Dame Inga Beale

Who is this old trout, I hear my fellow cunters say – well, your guess is as good as mine – perhaps it is Eddie Izzard one step beyond. Perhaps she is a friend of Dildo Hardon, perhaps she is some ignorant old tart who knows fuck all and got “appointed” like everyone’s favourite virologist Doreen Lawrence (there is nothing like a dame).

Whoever the meddling old cunt is she has jumped on the “test” bandwaggon, and wants “everyone” tested for HIV:

https://www.standard.co.uk/aidsfree/aidsfree-campaign-hiv-tests-elton-john-aid-foundation-b128392.html

Old hairycunt Beale, who probably shares her shit-stained knickers with Anal-Ease Dodds, and enjoys smelling the stale 4 week old piss stains, is the “chairperson” of the HIV Commission, and seems to think old men and wimmin in their 80s or 90s, schoolkids under 10 or anybody else who has never taken a trip down the Marmite staircase is HIV positive. What a fucking liberty, as well as being insulting and ignorant.

What a fucking insult. I am getting sick and tired of the old women of both sexes who insist on monitoring and controlling us. On the day when the government have pissed even moire millions to prop up Crossrail, the last thing we can afford is to waste public money – already billions spent on Covid, this this fucking Nazi’s fantasies.

If she wants to test people, try it on the poofter MPs and mincing civil servants who clog up Westminster

Nominated by: W. C. Boggs 

Dead Pool [187]


Congratulations to Whymeforfucksake for correctly predicting the merciful release of dear old Babs Windsor, aged 83.

She was a Carry On films icon and all round good ol’ girl. She’ll be missed. RIP my dear.

Onto Dead Pool 187. You know the rules:

1) Pick 5 famous cunts you think will conk out next. It is first come first served. You can always be a cunt and steal other cunters’ nominations from previous pools.

2) Anyone who nominates the world’s oldest man or woman is a cunt who will be ignored.

3) It must be a famous cunt we have heard of.

4) If your pick has already been taken, tough titty. Pick someone else because we can’t be arsed to check.

So on your marks, ready….set…..go!

A New Police State

The old bill are cunts.

They have become an arm of the state rather than the upholders of law and order. A

cucked, woke bunch of cunts that the people who opposed Peel warned us they would become.

I used to laugh at the idea this country could ever turn into the soviet union, but it is, one salami slice after another.

Anyone over 50 will remember freedom, no one under thirty will. They wont even think they have lost it.

Nominated by: Smug cunt 

Royal Mail (6)

(The pic above is admittedly 3 years old, but it got lost in the fucking post – DA)

I would like to draw the attention of my fellow cunters to Royal Mail who have decided to increase the price of a first class stamp by 9p (over 10%) from January 1st.

Way back in the 1960s when I was suffering a public school education my dear old pa wrote to me every Sunday and the letter was delivered each Monday without fail. The stamp cost 3d ,a gnat’s whisker over 1p. A pint of beer cost eight times the price of a stamp.

Whilst our postal workers tend to be excellent the management is shite. Mrs Guzzi recently sent a birthday card to a friend in Cornwall; it took 17 days to arrive from Derby with a first class stamp.

Royal Mail says that 2020 has been ‘challenging ‘. Well , I have news for them , 2021 is going to be even more challenging for them.

On a more positive note , Mrs G and I have become grandparents. My daughter gave birth to Sophie Emma at 2.06am on December 1st.

Nominated by: Guzziguy 

Oliver Dowden CBE MP CUNT

The Rt. Honourable Oliver Dowden CBE MP

A cunting please for nanny state twat Oliver Dowden for wasting ministerial time and taxpayers money meddling in things that do not concern him, namely his demand that the makers of The Crown post a ‘Health Warning’ at the beginning of each episode of their drama informing viewers that The Crown is not a documentary.

Fuck off cunt, this country’s infantilised enough without your mindless interference.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8996921/Culture-Secretary-Oliver-Dowden-demands-Netflix-make-clear-Crown-fiction.html

Nominated by Ruff Tuff Creampuff (Apologies to Mr Creampuff, as we had totally forgotten who the nominator was when putting this together. Probably drunk at the time – DA)