The joys of wrapping.

a bah humbug nomination of Christmas presents.

My knee hurts, my back aches I have worked up a mild sweat on the carpet, what have I been doing, well not what you think.
Wrapping Christmas presents! various shapes and sizes, fucking round with sellotape and ridiculous wraps that are akin to sellotape and sellotape does not stick too.
well on the first round (yesterday) Mrs B suggested a little seasonal music as we went about the jolly chore ( She sits and I wrap) however I think its bad taste to stab people at Christmas with siccors so I declined.
I did however stick to last years promise which is quite simple, If it is not square or rectangular you can wrap it! so as you can imagine there was a little tension there (You haven’t eaten you’re grumpy ect).
Well as far as I know the deed is done, Next months bin fillers are nicely wrapped.

https://youtu.be/vfH_WFxpdKM

Fuck that till next year.

Nominated by Lord benny

Shouty Unskilled Immigrants

Most of the unskilled Euro and third world enrichment influx around my way seem to converse at a speech volume that resembles your average Tourettes sufferer walking around Sainsbury’s.

It seems that the education systems that mould these people never saw fit in their 10 years of educating them to teach some basic standards of behaviour, namely manners and vocal control. I learnt not to shout as soon as I could talk. Many non-UK nationals have still not learnt this as adults!

So, rather than talking at a polite and civilised volume, these cultural enrichers seem to converse by shouting, even when feet apart from the person they’re talking to.

I have a foreign crew near me and they literally shout when they’re talking to such a degree that it sounds like a fight or heated auction bid up over some camels every time they open their mouths. It’s like living next to the crazy frog with a megaphone strapped to it’s mouth with all the: ‘Da ding da da ding ding, da ding ding, da, da diiing ding’ etc..

Yet I shouldn’t think they even know the sound of my voice as I speak at UK DB levels and can’t be heard past five feet away. Cunts!

I could invest in earplugs, but I’d rather the Gov invested in controlling unskilled immigration to the UK. How many more doctors and surgeons do we need manning car washes and selling cars? Thirteen more arrived on a dinghy yesterday. Thank Christ for that though, as my car’s filthy and the doctors surgery is always fully booked.

Nominated by Cuntry Cunt

Jay Rayner

An end of year, seasonal cunting for bon viveur, gastronome, food snob and all round annoying tosspot luvvie… Layyydeeezz an’ Gennnerrrmenn, I give you all round arrogant CUNT, Jay Rayner.

What has blubber-the-gut done that has got The Sheikh so steamed up?

Notwithstanding that this festering pile of superiority is, surprise fucking surprise an EU remainer, keen to be ruled by an unelected hostile foreign elite which makes him a Grade-A vulval area on it’s own, read below for why he’s up there with so many other utter cunts whose “celebrity” and self-importance we have thrust in our faces:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-7754691/Jay-Rayner-Mum-Claires-ashes-West-End-show.html

Here’s a question for you fellow cunters. Would you want to eat in a restaurant contaminated with human ashes? No? There’s a fucking surprise. Yet the straggly bearded arsewipe has scattered/secreted his parents ASHES at some of the UK’s most prestigious places, for example, at the posh restaurant for wealthy up-their-own-arses, more-money-than-sense, celeb cunts, The Ivy.

Now I don’t know about you, although considering where certain contributors would stick their tongues, the thought of inhaling a lungful of desiccated, decarbonised, Claire Rayner dust while sitting down to an overpriced microscopic meal served on anything but a fucking plate, doesn’t exactly appeal. More to the point, as this stupid arrogant Cunt of the Century has admitted contaminating said restaurant with human remains, surely he has committed an offence AND affected the hygiene standard of The Ivy and other venues contaminated with his parents’ human remains.

Contact Westminster Council and complain about Rayner deliberately contaminating public places.

The odious straggly bearded slug lauds this as a “celebration”, while metropolitan Islington cunts comment of this “lovely gesture”. I wonder how “lovely” they’d find it if he scattered human remains in THEIR homes, all over the floors and kitchen seats.

The worst bit is the high-handed hypocrisy of the arrogant, self-important fuckwit. I mean, what actually does he DO apart from eat and complain? This is the hallmark of a truly decadent society when some fat tub of lard is “famous” for eating lunch. This cunt adds nothing to society, apart from his being an arrogant, pompous cunt. If I had my way, I’d have him dipped in beaten egg, 20kg of garlic/parsley butter rammed up his arse, rolled in his parents remaining ashes and turned on a spit, RAYNER KIEV a la mode, served on a bed of rocket (fuel) and garnished with remainer tears.

He is a cunt, his mother was an annoying busybody and hopefully he will fuck off into the great void, but not before being PROSECUTED for contaminating a public eating place. Anyone who doesn’t agree is a cunt, because I, the Imam of All Cunts, decrees it.

Nominated by Sheikh Anvakh

Christie Elan-Cane

CHRISTIE SOMETHING OR OTHER….

A cunting please for this ugly object, be it male, female or whatever, who wants “gender neutral” passports (will we be seeing terrorists in drag in future?)

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-50638629

Just look at the vacuous shit stain – clearly an underemployed man/woman/thing.

Why do these vile creatures have to look like something out of a science fiction mortuary?. And why do they have to have fucking daft names like ‘Christie’?

What a cunt.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

Joel Bennathan QC

Joel Bennathan QC….

Whilst all the finger-pointing goes on about Usman Khan’s release, I would like to nominate this ‘silk’ for a cunting. This man is the chief enabler of Khan’s release and much more besides.

You can read all about him, his legal talents, and some of the shit-heels he’s managed to set free here:

https://www.doughtystreet.co.uk/barristers/joel-bennathan-qc

The enemies of the good people can have many disguises.

Nominated by The Stained Gusset