As the whole world knows, the UK finally left the bloated, undemocratic European Union on 31st January. That evening, the EU appeared to deliver a final poke in the eye for Brexiteers by displaying a ‘Scotland Loves Europe’ light show on the side of the EU Commission building in Brussels. “Thanks for nothing”, we thought.

“Oh look”, gushed SNP Fuhrer, Nicola ‘Wee Jimmy Krankie’ Sturgeon as she tweeted an image of the building. “The EU Commission tonight (and if you look carefully, you’ll see that they do appear to have left a light on for us!”.

Er, really, Wee Jimmy? It’s a bit strange then that spokespersons for the EU are now claiming “nous n’en savons rien, chef” (‘don’t know nuffink abaht it, chief’). I’m afraid that your weasel wording “it does appear…” has let the cat scramble out of the bag. It’s being stated in the meeja that in fact, the SNP itself commissioned an Edinburgh company to set up the display. If this is indeed the case, it’s extremely concerning to see the ScotNazis trying to imply that the EU connived in this tacky stunt, particularly if it turns out that it was paid for with tax-payers’ money. The EU has confirmed that the SNP did not seek authorisation for the display. Almost certainly, agreement would have been denied, as to agree would have seemed to be an active, public encouragement of secession on the EU’s part.

This looks like a shabby deceit played upon the people of Scotland; part of the SNP’s game to deflect attention away from its dismal performance in government north of the border. Oh dear, Wee Jimmy; seems as though you’ve been caught with your tartan drawers around your ankles, and it most definitely is not a pretty sight. You should be embarrassed, but I don’t think that’s in your make-up. Just do us all a favour. Shut your gurning and yapping and stick to the day job for fuck’s sake, you malicious little shit.

Nominated by Ron Knee

A nom please for “Home”, a new comedy show coming to channel 4, these days home of the woke.

Now my ears instantly prick up when any ad for a show opens with a quote from the Grauniad, extolling how wonderful it is; lo and behold, such is the case for this sack of spunk. The show is about – get this – the wacky adventures of a Syrian migrant new to the shores of the paradise where all is free, the UK.

Of course in current fashion, the immigrant in question is less your knife rampage, suicide vest, death-to-the-infidels type and more akin to a cuddly brown version of Andy Kaufman’s Latka Gravas from Taxi; a laugh a minute, jolly ball of fun that doesn’t want to fuck your 12-year-old daughter, honest.

Reality – overrated according to C4 and the Grauniad. Mind you, don’t mention C4. Our gimmegrant pal has never heard of it.

Nominated by Cuntan the Cuntarian

‘Listen guys, d’you want to talk about the game? See you in the gent’s at coffee time…’

Would you believe it? Chat about football, cricket and other sports should be ‘actively curtailed’ in the workplace according to dingbat Ann Francke, Director of the Chartered Management Institute. According to Mizzz Francke, sports chat can exclude women, and can be (wait for it) ‘a gateway to more laddish behaviour’, and if unchecked, ‘is a signal of a more laddish culture’, such as boorish sexual banter.

Christ on a bike, where do they find the fuckwits who come up with this nonsense? In a stupid factory somewhere? For a start, these comments are actually sexist. Millions of women up and down the country follow, and indeed participate, in sport of all kinds. To suggest that they are poor little dears who might feel left out and unable to take part in a sport-related conversation is ludicrous. At the same time Francke suggests,rather oddly, that ‘talking about technical aspects of football, such as video assisted refereeing,could disproportionately exclude women’. She seems to be implying that in fact, women are too thick to appreciate such things, which doesn’t strike me as being a very consistent line of argument. Or indeed very sisterly.

What happens then, when the conversation turns to films, or kids, or the weather, or holidays? Is everyone who isn’t interested in these things presumed to be left feeling excluded? Taking Francke’s line of thinking to its logical conclusion, talk about anything other than work-related matters would have to be ‘curtailed’. And as for her assertion that sports chat can lead to a more uninhibited type of conversation, I can only respond by stating that in any of my places of work over the years, women have never been backward in coming forward as far as sexual banter is concerned. There’s a bit of a ‘ladette’ culture about as well, if my experience is anything to go by. No mention of that though by Francke.

I do find it odd then to think that all these strong, empowered women we keep hearing so much about are simultaneously in need of measures to protect against any bruising of their delicate sensibilities. I don’t know, maybe I’m just being a bit paranoid; maybe Francke’s comments are nothing more than another banal bit of SJW-type posturing, making what she thinks are the right noises. Yet these comments do seem to me to be indicative of the kind of thought police mentality we get so much of these days, putting men in the sights of the identity politics warriors again. Moreover they smack of hypocrisy. If some bloke suggested that women should be ‘curtailed’ from talking about make-up, handbags, clothes or whatever, this banshee would no doubt be wailing ‘misogyny!’ and ‘sexism!’, and ranting on about men wanting to control women. I conclude that this self-styled ‘expert on gender balance in the workplace’ only believes in free speech when people like her get to define what it actually is. Methinks that here’s another one who’d like to control the narrative to suit her own agenda.

I’m with Piers Morgan on this, who responded by saying ‘we’ve got to stop these virtue-signalling cretins sucking all the fun out of life’. No doubt many of you out there in IsACland will go further, and demand that this gobshite should get back in the kitchen and put her old man’s tea on.

Management potential, then? I’d say it’s more a case of sacked in the morning, you’re getting sacked in the morning…

Nominated by Ron Knee

Answering every question starting with ‘So’….

It’s taken a while, but fuck a rubber duck, this trend, if you can call it that, is really getting on my tits now.

There was a time when beginning a sentence with the word ‘so’ was appropriate, such as asking certain questions e.g. “So what’s all this about then?” and “So when are we going to go?”, but now everyone from little runt school kids to university professor’s are using ‘so’ as the default start to most replies. Sooo irritating, and if it’s irritating then it’s cuntish, just like this shitty spelling checker that changes cunt to count, the useless cunt (sorry going off piste a bit there, ISACers)

After a little research on the net, it seems that this misuse of the little conjunction was the favourite of geek programmers and techies, then it went viral when Mr Million dollars-an-hour and master life manipulator “Cuntbook” CEO Mark Fuckerberg was starting every reply with ‘So’ in interviews. The guy makes me sick. He has so much fucking clout, the expressionless faced cunt. Looks like a character from Star Trek; I just wish someone would beam him up.

Now I don’t pretend to be word perfect, but the feeling I get when everyone and his wife now uses this sentence initial when being questioned is that they are trying to avoid answering properly, because they either don’t know how to, or can’t be bothered, the lazy fucktards. ‘So’ is the new ‘basically’, as far as I’m concerned and if it doesn’t bother anybody else fine, or should I say cool.

Fuck me, I’m turning into a trendy slang cunt.

Nominated by Dai O’Rhea

“No platforming”….The deliberate, nasty and premeditated practice of not allowing a different opinion or viewpoint to be debated, or discussed by preventing the speaker FROM SPEAKING!

This abhorrent practice is becoming more and more widespread, accepted and promoted and it’s just plain wrong.

The loony, laughable left and their official wokesman, Owen “rusks and milk” Jones, are ceaseless champions of this abomination and are actually allowed to get away with it, claiming they do so in the name of “democracy”. A quick heads up kids – one of the fundamental underpinning principles of democracy is FREE SPEECH and if somebody has a different opinion to you, that does not make them automatically wrong and it is not acceptable to demonise them.

People are waking up to this, and some are now calling it out for what it is – Racism, Fascism, bigotry and Hate speech, because:

“No platforming” IS A CUNT!

Nominated by Vernon Fox