I’d like to nominate Overton Windows, or more precisely the narrowing overton window of those who use social media.

Peter Hitchens made a good point about how social media creates a stifling political conformity where the majority silently accept that certain things must be believed and anything else shouted down, and that careers need to be destroyed because of political heresy.

One of the striking things is this default position of those on the Blairite liberal-lef that anything that happens that does not conform to the pro-EU, multiculti BBC liberal worldview is a dystopian develooment, and draws immediate comparisons to the very overrated series Black Mirror from snarky idiots on social media.
‘When will this episode of Black Mirror end?’
Fuck off and try living under the threat of nuclear annihilation, or religious persecution you myopic, pampered cunt.

The comparison with current events is a bit more understandable, but still a little dramatic, and the comparing of the election of Trump and Brexit only highlights the amnesia nd ignorance of so many ‘educated’ people, who seem to believe the world began after 1992 and the only thing that ever dared to disrupt their lives of liberal democracy, shopping for accessories, gormless John Lennon worship and surfing the web promised by Francis Fukuyama was 9/11 and the 2008 financial crisis.

Basic bastard cunts.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime

Mental birds

I think it’s time I tried to take my mind off the bat flu for five minutes by reminiscing about mental birds I’ve hung out of in the past.

I don’t know about you, but I seem to attract lunatics? I have learned my lesson though and have a normal lady now (married the fucker), but fuck me I’ve had some mentals.

For example, it started when I was about 11. I was kicking a ball around outside and this lad came out and asked if he could play. Said he was called Mike (or something) and was new to the area. So, we end up having a kick about. We get on well and start hanging around together. Next, another mate says, ‘That’s not a boy. It’s a girl. My mum is friends with her mum. Her name’s Claire.’ I confront him/her and she confesses. Next, I’m getting love letters through the door with threats of suicide if I don’t go out with her. Right carry on it caused. She’d post drawings through the door of her stabbing herself with ‘This is why we must be married’. Fucked me right up lol.

This was at age 11 ffs. But it gets worse.

At 17, I pop my cherry with a proper fit bird at college. We get serious. Then she confesses that she has a kink. She liked to be peed on. I laugh and think she’s taking the piss (pun intended). Well, it got to the stage where I would sit down to piss, because she’d follow me into the bog for me to piss on her. I had to pretend I was having a shit. Thank god she wasn’t a poop muncher, is all I can say.

Then there was the one who came at me with knives when she was on the blob. There was the one that thought I was having an affair every 5 minutes (I wasn’t) and would check my phone, internet use and call my mum asking her if she knew I was having affairs.

There was another one that slapped me across my face for speaking to a girl who said hello to me in a shopping centre, because she had been in my class at secondary school.

The good news is that I’ve picked up the vibes of ‘Harridan’s Disease’ nowadays and I’m married to a relaxed and non possessive lady. Pain in the arse sometimes (drama queen), but I’ve done alright there.

One wonders if other ISAC members have their own stories in a similar vein too? One can only wonder how the likes of tongue to arse injectors and those who live in towers have dealt with their own nutters?

Nominated by Cuntybollocks

Ellen DeGeneres

The delightful US Talk show carpet muncher otherwise known as Ellen DeGeneres has been blasted by her TV crew for poor communication and severe pay cuts while she hosts show from home with non-union production staff during lockdown

Ellen earns $87.5million a year (!!!!) for the talk show and has a net worth of $490m.

Warner Bros. issued a statement saying they ‘are committed to taking care of our staff and crew and have made decisions first and foremost with them in mind’. This translates to
her TV crew receiving a massive 60% pay cut which they were told about only last week.

Earlier this month the stupid overpaid tart came under fire for comparing quarantine to jail.

Last month she was the focus of a viral Twitter thread calling her ‘one of the meanest people alive’.

Staggered firstly that someone clearly so little talent can command such a huge salary (think Oprah, now a billionaire) however suppose this the ridiculous USA for you, and secondly how someone can have such contempt and disrespect towards her work colleagues, without who lets face it, her miserable programme would not see the light of day.

Nasty horrid bitch.

Nominated by Willie Stroker

Christ on a fucking bike will nobody rid me of these fucking meerkats???

I have now reached screaming pirch and am in genuine danger of smashing the TV screen when this fucking advert comes on. Bad enough when some fucking dickwit thought up compare the fucking meerkat. Worse that they ring it to death. But now they give us Auto-fucking-Sergei.

Let’s be objective for a moment. Comparison sites push the companies that pay them for click through. Then they push the companies that pay them for advertising.

When you get through all that shit, remember that the prices they quote are “indicative quotes only” so when you actually get the price, it’s inevitably different.

So – bearing all that in mind – would you seriously let this piece of crap do your switching for you using your money? Do you really think you’ll be able to get the best deal? If you do then you’re fucking soft in the head!

I reckon it’s time for, some fresh approach to meerkat advertising . After all, they must be running out of ideas. So how about…

Life insurance : Watching meerkats boiled alive in oil
Car insurance : Driving a car full of meerkats over a cliff and being smashed to bits
Home insurance : A house full of meerkats burned alive

Or best of all, travel insurance : A plane load of meerkats crashing into the Compare the Market headquarters with no survivors.

I’d pay money to watch those…

Nominated by Dioclese

LORDS AND LADIES:

Words fail me – the greedy fat elderly piss-stained fuckwits who sit in the House of Lords are “demanding” to receive their £323 a day “attendance” allowances for sitting on their shit encrusted arses in their own homes, instead of attending the private public urinal they normally squatin at Westminster:

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/politics/2020/04/17/peers-demand-323-daily-allowance-log-virtual-parliamentary-proceedings/

Considering the fucking nuisance most of these bastards made of themselves during the Brexit debates, I would suggest they are told to either “contribute” at home free, or just shut the fuck up. They need to be reminded that they can’t take it with them when they go – it would probably melt.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

Peers of the realm are due a nomination. With the times we’re living in, most people have either been furloughed or outright lost their jobs completely. Peers are in the fortunate position of not having to worry about this sort ‘ordinary’ person sort of thing by virtue of the fact they’ve been getting overly generous salaries, courtesy of the British taxpayers for years, sometimes even decades. They have enough in the bank to ensure that they don’t have any financial worries.

Now that parliament is closed, they’ve accepted that things have changed and that they won’t be able to live in the manner to which they had become accustomed, i.e. dining in one of the Lords subsidised bars, clocking in in the morning and then fucking off during the day just to pick up their daily allowance. That kind of freeloading has come to a temporary end. Well, the dining has anyway. It seems a number of our unelected officials have been demanding they start receiving their £323 TAX FREE daily allowance when they attend the virtual parliament that will shortly be opening. I need to stress that this is only a minority. Surprisingly, most of them seem to have realised that taking a large tax free payment for sitting at home in front of a laptop to conduct parliamentary business would send out the wrong message to us peasants.

Unfortunately, some of these cunts have decided that having to actually do what they were put in the Lords through cronyism to do for a change means they’re entitled to pocket our money. I disagree. These are the kind of twats who, as I said, turn up in the morning, clock in to ensure they get their daily allowance, and then leave the Lords to spend the day…doing whatever lazy bastard Lords do when they’re not earning the money they just effectively stole from taxpayers. What are they going to do? Refuse to appear via Zoom? Then kick them out. It’s that simple.

I’ve just done some quick sums. £323 per day for five days comes to £1615 per week. That’s £19,380 per year. Then of course there’s the expenses and other…err…’perks’ of being an unelected member of the upper chamber of parliament. Not a bad screw, especially since that minority don’t actually do anything to earn it.

Nominated by Quick Draw McGraw