Bargain Hunt

Posted on March 20, 2016 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

The BBC should do the decent thing and rename their lunchtime show Bargain Cunt.

Wonacott rarely fucking shows up these days, apparenlty because he’s had a row with the producers so they’ve booted him off the gravy train. I wonder if he twatted one of them like Clarkson (allegedly) did? Hope so, they probably deserved it. I think the real reason is because he’s busy helping the BBC rip off their other show (Antiques Roadshow vs Road trip, either way it’s fucking boring) or he’s at home dyeing his barnett an ever darker shade of ‘Raven’s Feather’ black…

So now we have to put up with the so-called array of ‘experts’ whose attempts at replicating Wonacott’s lively patter generally translates as bouncing around and grinning like they’ve shat a Faberge egg whilst managing to consistently buy any old shit for more money than anybody else will ever pay for it. There’s got to be some back-handers afoot here (it is the BBC)… I saw one show when a fucking dealer turned up at the auction and bought his own item back, for about £20 less than the contestants had paid him for it! Does the Beeb expect me to believe that this inner circle of junk-shop merchants aren’t all in it together? It all seems pretty fucking chummy to me.

Money for old rope. Literally.

Nominated by: Nickleby

Michael Parkinson [3]

Posted on March 20, 2016 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

Parky deserves a serious cunting for fronting the Sun Life Guaranteed Over 50 Plan for so long.

Many people of a certain age trust Parky, so it’s a great choice for Sun Life. What the ill-informed cunts don’t realise is that these plans are one of the worst type of so-called investments that it is possible to make. “All we ask is that you keep paying your premiums for life, or your Plan will end and you’ll get nothing back”. “Depending on how long you live, you could pay in more than the cash sum paid out.” Cunts.

And don’t get me started on you get a free pen just for applying. That’s something you really need when you’re over 50, isn’t it. A fucking pen. Cunts.

But Parky gets the cunting for promoting it.

Nominated by: Pedro Almovar

Bob Monkhouse

Posted on March 19, 2016 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

Bob Monkhouse. A smarmy cunt of the highest order.

Supposedly had hundreds of jokebooks compiled over his career. Pity they were all full of self effacing baron shite that wouldn’t even make a moron grin. All that “what….” after/ before getting to his dire punchlines and looking around for acceptance. Needs a punch up the throat even though the cunt is dead.

Good riddence to a dire excuse for a human piece of shite.

Nominated by: Dave Moor

Will Self [4]

Posted on March 19, 2016 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

Will Self. I could almost leave it at that.

Will Self encapsulates all that is most sickening in the modern left. He is sanctimonious and supercilious on any subject he is ever allowed to comment upon. His sneering contempt for any rebuttal to his position seems studied to make any normal person wish to take a brick to his face. That his views have been shown, time and again, to be wrong, and disastrous when allowed to be tried, has no effect upon his self absorbed psyche.

Will Self is worshipped by the Fat Carole’s at the council offices and the Tristrams at Uni. These people, who can only find joy in life through fucking over their fellow man, while trying to place a patina of respectability to their evil souls by espousing a doctrine they feel makes their actions somehow less reprehensible as it is “all for the greater good”; love Will Self as he is willing to be the obvious cunt they wish they had the balls to be.

The world will be a better place without Will Self, and an improvement will be if he could take his fans with him.

Nominated by: Cato