Mike Ashley (2)

Mike Ashley is a fat cockney tight fisted cunt. This bloke who is somehow a multi billionaire came out a few years ago claiming he wanted to win something with Newcastle. I would usually have not blamed him for any problems that occurred after he started spending money on the club. But now the fat cunt has decided because we haven’t won anything yet he doesn’t want to spend anymore money on Newcastle. He reckons he can’t afford to giving anymore money yet Jabba the cunt has recently bought 200 million worth of property! And I wonder where it came from since he hasn’t got that money to spent? Fuck off back to your hole and sell Newcastle while your at it you lying humongous sub human tub of lard cunt!

Nominated by Lord cuntington.

Edinburgh University


An emergency cunting for the University of Edinburgh after they decided to investigate one of their students for an Islamaphobic hate crime.

It seems that 21 year old law student Robbie Travers wrote a Facebook post after the US Air Force bombed an ISIS stronghold in Afghanistan in April. This sparked a complaint from fellow student Esme Allman, who accused him of ‘blatant Islamaphobia’. Not sure, but from the picture, said complainant looks a bit peaceful?

Travers wrote ‘I’m glad we could bring these barbarians a step closer to collecting their 72 virgins’ – a sentiment I’m sure cunters on here share with the majority of the population.

Plod are quite rightly entirely disinterested in the whole affair, but the University are behaving like total absolute cunts.

Travers says he’s considering taking legal action and adds ‘Wish me luck!’ Good luck, mate

Nominated by Dioclese

Brighton, East Sussex

Brighton, the Place to Be.

Spotted a number of cunters admitting that they reside within the purlieus of Brighton and thus generating a fools paradise of interest. Allow me to mark some cards. Have had connections in Brighton for many a year. Have seen it evolve from Poof’s Paradise (which it still is me darlings) to a multi-gender-multi-cultural Greens/Labour cesspit. Along the way the classically (allegedly) dodgy council is obsessed with obliterating its delightfully seedy Vicky/Edwardian seaside heritage. After allowing the wonderful West Pier to burn and rot and replacing it with a glass doughnut viewing ring riding up and down on a phallus that grinds to a halt mid air whenever punters are aboard, next move in “regeneration” is stripping out all the remaining genuine heritage. Replacements? Endless booze joints stinking of stale beer and “clubs” thumping out mega loud bass.
The greasers in The Council have trousered a vast quantity of Heritage, Lottery and EU Regeneration cashola. Natural next step? Use that money (though not all of it apparently, allegations of diversions into private slush funds, council bribery and corruption ect ect) to fuck over that for which it was intended ie The Heritage in favour of a weird pastiche of concrete and aluminium (in place of cast iron and brick) reminiscent of Ostend on speed. You can view this EU Remainers paradise from the new Zip Wire dear hearts.

Fancy a walk on the wild side? An evening stroll skipping over spilt booze, used syringes, dosser turds and sharps safes (plastic boxes for used needles cunts) ? Watching a couple of dykes tongue fucking is sure to melt the hardest of hearts. The moon is out, is that a shooting star? (could it be Elizabeth Hurley or one of the slappers from Strictley?) Take a seat in a Magic Booth, one of the few remaining seaside shelters (avoid if possible unless they remind you of home, the ones with dosser cardboard that stinks of human piss and any with blood on the seats) . Your drugs of choice will be brought to you, Also avoid, unless that way inclined, the attentions of the dosser prossies, occasionally genuine refugees but mostly Rumanian skanks. Gotta be hard core to shag one of those. Respect if you can.

So much to do, so much to see. A trip down Marine Drive to watch Dyke Beach Volleyball (avoid needles in the sand) is recommended if the cunter appreciates boy shaped fillies arses (fat arsed variety can’t hack it). Down towards the Marina the discerning cunter may view Pikeys on holiday, caravans nicely parked up in a public car park right on the sea. Heavenly. Opposite on the grass a benefits “refugee” camp of our young male muslim friends . Feeling so loved up now.
Cunters with young children are sure to want to visit and play that old game “Spot a White Face”. Main areas like Western Road and London Road not recommended to avoid disappointment. Frustration and tantrum counseling readily available in Brighton.

Also the Seagulls down here are mugging bastards (and I don’t just mean the football team).

Nominated by Sir Limply Stoke.

What is the difference between Robert E Lee and Robert Lee?

I’d like to nominate neo-liberalism (old fascism) for a much overdue cunting.

The final straw being – in this era where “group think” is the main salience point on any decision – when ESPN decided to pull a Robert (please note no “E”) Lee from their University of Virginia college football coverage in case it offended any snowflake cunts in Virginia (following the Charlottesville unrest last week).

Yes ladies and gentlemen, thus is how far the reach (or is that Reich) of the liberalist agenda tech giants goes!

So afraid are other companies in the public eye of being vilified by these tech giants (and their global opinion reach) that they’re not so much “walking on eggshells” but have buried the chickens and have denounced that such a creature ever existed in the first place!

So ESPN’s Robert (no “E”) Lee. He must obviously be an old old white guy with a southern drawl, white hair and goatee to match right?

Wrong,, this Robert Lee is of Chinese origin a’la Bruce Lee. WTF!?!

When I heard the story I thought it was a wind up but no, ESPN actually released a statement saying that they thought it best not to use Robert (no “E”) Lee for the coverage….just in case it caused any offence.

Has it really gotten to the point where people’s given names are a source of offence!?! Are they for fucking real!??!

Guess so. Well in that case – cunts – I’d like to ban the name “Mohamed” (and its 4 billion other fucking spellings) because I find *that* name really fucking offensive!

Sure that would have to include Muhammad Ali but every cunt refers to him as Ali anyway so the “Muhammad” bit can be comfortably dropped and everyone will still know who you mean.

Fuck’s sake!

http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2017/08/23/espns-decision-to-pull-announcer-robert-lee-from-game-sparks-outcry.amp.html

Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!

Modern Parenting (3)

I’d like to deliver a royal cunting to the sharp-elbowed shitcunt ‘modern parents’ who allow their fucking brats to behave like absolute cunts in public. Watching the news earlier, I saw this little shit clambering on the news desk in front of Alastair Stewart, while he was trying to deliver his autocue reading. What did the fucking mother do? Smiled and simpered in that fucking fist-chewingly morose way all modern Bugaboo-wielding shitcunts do.

All kinds of complex socio-political decisions have got us to this point where kids are largely uncontrollable. The liberal left, unsurprisingly, have had a major faeces-smeared hand in fucking up the boundaries of modern parenting. Demonising almost any form of discipline; putting the inclusion, and even fucking opinions of children above the rest of society; decimating the traditional roles of men and women in families, and even expecting teachers to fill all the fucking roles that modern parents increasingly want to rid themselves of – even down to giving them fucking breakfast and counselling.

A few months ago I was at a restaurant with some friends. Notwithstanding it being late on a fucking Friday night anyway, these two utter cuntfucks brought their screaming sprog into the gaff. Once pacified, he then was allowed to wander around the restaurant, putting his fucking hands in other diners’ food and all kinds of fucking liberties until some geezer, quite rightly, roared at the parents for being so shit. They eventually looked up from their fucking smartphones and finally did something at that point. The entitlement and self-importance of these sorts of fucking idiots is off the cunt-charts.

The next time some father of an uncontrollable kid tries to excuse all the banging on your walls/ceiling as being down to them ‘having kids’, tell them “having kids doesn’t fucking exclude you from showing your neighbours a bit of consideration.”

The next time some left-lib-lush tries to argue that her precious sprog “will be your future carer, doctor or local policeman”, tell them that her actually not-so-fucking precious “may equally end up being my future mugger, unscrupulous landlord or crooked financial advisor who tries to diddle me out of my meagre pension.”

And the next time someone tries to tell you it is “society’s responsibility to bring up their kid”, be sure to tell them “fuck off you self-entitled cunthole”, and be sure to tell them that I sent you.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back.