Professional YouTubers need to be pencilled in for some serious fucking straight talking.
Back in the dim-and-distant, sun-drenched vista of 2006 or so, this cracking new website called YouTube appeared which allowed people to share their videos; usually long-forgotten VHS crackly bollocks or the like. Harmless fun for real people, not yet infected with the twin-cancers of social media online validation needs and the nadir of reality television.
Then, as with everything online, it became big, became all about the moolah, the advertising. Bought by Google, this marked the almost certain death-knell of the site for any genuine fun or creativity. Worst of all, it bred the Frankenstein’s monster of modern times – the professional YouTuber.
These cunts follow a very strict template:
– Loud and overbearing? Check.
– Lots of infantile stupidity in vomit-crayola colours? Check.
– Apeing anything and everything in popular culture? Check.
– Promoting the latest tat and shit merchandise from corporate brands? Check
– Earn millions of $$$ in the process? Cheque and mate, cunt.
The burden of approaching middle-age is that family members of teenage years or thereabouts deluge you with their inescapable shite. And in this era, included are YouTube ‘stars’. With nephews, nieces and cuntsins aplenty, there is never a device or computer left without one of these barking simpletons screaming at the onlooker. I therefore sadly know far more about these fucking YouTubers than I ever should.
As one example, let’s look at our very own British whitebread snowflake princess ‘Zoella’. This cunt has become a multi-millionaire whilst still in her twenties, thanks to her beauty ‘vlogging’ and the tacky crap featured on her channel. The cunt wrote a book, called, I don’t know, ‘The Life and Times of a Bath Bomb Loving Shitcunt’, or something. Anyway, it turns out that large parts of this book (i.e. all of it) were not actually written by her at all, despite the heavy promotion. Hey, most zlebs have ghostwriters for their autobiographies, that isn’t uncommon. Difference here is that this shit-book was actually a ‘novel’. Promoted as hers. And she basically wrote fuck all of it. This fraud became a moderately big story here.
Following this, she did what all millenials do when the heat in the Aga becomes unbearable – she fled the fucking scene, citing the need for a ‘break’ and the good ole’ hasty retreat beat to the lavender and jasmine scented safe space.
This just demonstrates the problem with ‘professional YouTubers’. They forget that their fame and popularity is all thanks to the me-too culture of instant gratification in the form a fucking thumbs up. No talent of any kind is required – you can simply be an autisitc black kid from Sarf Landan reviewing pizza – it’s all about the currency of LOL. So when these cunts try their hand at anything which does require actual, real ability, then they fail, and fail badly – or, they simply get someone else to do the real work. Other YouTube cunts have attempted to release films which were reviewed and recieved as poorly as you would expect. The commercial shite they push and the corporate cock they take deep enough to tickle the appendix reminds us just what a cynical fucking industry the whole field has become. And since it is Google-owned, you can expect any attempts to search for anything you might really want to watch to be headed in the results by promoted, unrelated shite like Shane Dawson eating his own fucking ear wax or something similar.
The link below is of a professional YouTuber who one niece loves. Obama appeared in one of her videos. I will simply say nothing and instead let the exceptional talent shine through and do the talking.
So a major cunting for these neon-painted, shrill loudmouth cunts who continue to give kids an early start into their own millenial cuntdom. I know my own younger family members are rapidly heading down that path and for me, it is a race to the grave before having to face the sheer magnitude of their future adult cuntdom.
nominated by. The Empire Cunts Back
