Thank You Thursday (TYT)

No not a character name for an indigenous Bond Girl (but if it was doubtless you could write your own screenplay for that one) but yes, another Yank Wank idea to part you from your hard earned with a dose orf guilt and syrup. Has been aroinde in Yankland for some years now, on a par with Father’s Day and Mother’s Day and intended to flog crap Hallmark TYT cards, boxes orf foul Hershey TYT candy and similar shite. Idea is you bang some orf same in the post (or use an extortionate bespoke delivery service) as a mark orf delight at the tat some cunt at the last minute has remembered to give you for Christmas. Now as ever the tawdry concept has been dumped very second hand on poor Blighty’s heaving shores. Reports orf snowflakes agonising over what to write and etiquette sites appearing advising you how to.
Yours Truly’s advice? Punt the self same crapola back at the cunts from whence it came withoit comment and withoit stamps so the cunts are suckered in to pay excess postage. A further steer from YT. Do not give away any sign orf your identity so the cunts have to work oit to whom the shite was given.

Fuck Orf Friday anyone? For a modest fee (plus expenses) YT will regale your loved one(s) with a personal message orf Yuletide and Noel Joy any Friday after Christmas.

Nominated by Sir Limply Stoke

Neckbeards.

Flaccid, flabby (not necessarily fat) young men unable to manage decent stubble growth due to low testosterone, who address their close friends as ‘sir’ and ‘madam’ and in other overly deferential terms . They usually have dirty, long unstyled hair, and go on about wearing monocles and cravats and spend their social life snorting and hooting about the latest shit memes and the comedy of Richards Herring and Ayoade at the back of a Games Workshop branch, but have never visited a pub, raised their voice beyond their bedrooms or wargaming club, or a pint glass.
Can’t make eye contact with a woman who isn’t their mum, or whatever obese, shrill and mentally ill blue-haired thing they call a girlfriend, even when merely ordering food or drink, mumbling and murmering their order to the increasingly appalled barmaid/waitress, who the neckbeard is now convinced hates him.
The neckbeard has trouble holding down even a minimum wage job or working full time. He finds ‘traditional masculinity’ (which he abbreviates to ‘trad. Masc.’ offensive (threatening) and doesn’t speak to his father. He is careful to avoid contact with any older male who looks like they ‘work/worked for a living’. He is also hugely resentful of men his age with well paid, full-time employment and good-looking girlfriends, who he will denounce as a ‘normie’ or ‘chad’, if his involuntary celibacy has completely crippled him to such a sorry, infantile state.

Fucking neckbeard cunts.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime

As if we don’t have enough meddling bastards in our country keeping on remoaning the fucking Germans are at it now:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-46918009

One of the letter writers to The Times in the picture that accompanies that article looks like a lezzie and the other a poof.

Why don’t they keep their meddlng snouts out of our affairs. Germany just wants another mug – us – to share the bills and the immigrants they don’t give a fuck about us.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

Flabapottomus again. Sorry.

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2019/jan/18/diane-abbott-accuses-bbc-question-time-of-legitimising-racism

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before:-

It’s not that she is a clueless, patronising waste of space, devoid of even the most basic grasp on maths, or even reality.

It’s not even the mad way her eyes roll around her head, suggesting a sandwich or five short of a picnic.

It’s waycism.

rolls eyes

yawns

It’s hilarious up until the point that you remember she is only a couple of random events from being home secretary. Imagine her and catweazle running ting’. Having said that, I don’t know a single person of sound mind that would vote for Corbyn. Having said that, the mong hordes are stupid. So who knows.

Pretty much the worst advert for affirmative action anywhere, but her fellow…….people…….never miss an opportunity to vote her back in.

Nominated by Mecha-rigsby