Fosters

Fosters. Seriously, why do people like this revolting, faux Aussie crap? It tastes like fermented rat piss. Had a few cans of it as my first experience of drinking alcohol and aside from once more in snakebite I haven’t touched it since. Nasty, fermented sewage water.

Nominated by OpinionatedCunt

The Remoanstream Media

A cunting again for the Remainstream Media

Woke up got out of bed…dragged a comb across my head…..
Oh to go back to the days in my life when it was just like John’s lyrics above , but no , everyday it’s more ….woke up got out of bed …turned on the news and felt the dread….

Today’s fake news? Despite falling sales , people moving from diesel to hybrid, opening a factory in Slovakia, opening a factory in China and paying off 1000 agency staff 2 years ago….the middle management job losses announced at Jaguar this morning are due to brexit…. the words used ” Brexit consequences are beginning to be felt”.
Now I knew the betrayal was coming from the elitist establishment cunts from the beginning, my piss boiling is not about that…its about how fucking stupid they think we are with this project fear shit. It’s not even subtle anymore such is the panic in the run up to March. What’s more the media.. ..where do I begin with the treasonous remoaning liberal fucktard cunts. Exposed totally as the cunts they are last 2 years. They are all complicit…the reporter, editor and anchor
When I saw it this morning, piss boiled to steam.. fucking ranting at the wife at half 7 in the morning, I really have to be honest with my fellow cunters and myself. Maybe I need to stop posting and visiting this site. Switch off the news and any other media I keep up to date with and just take a break. I’m honestly sore jawed from clenching it this morning and pissed off before the days even begun….it’s not healthy. I always said I had to be aware and up to date with the betrayal, as ignorance is what they hope for in the populace but I’m seriously fed up of the total and utter war machine of big business and elitist establishment onslaught…. all given oxygen from a remain populace that embarrasses me as my fellow British. It’s easy to tell me to calm the fuck down and take a chill pill but there’s not a half our goes by without a fucking cave in or blatant lie from our Parliament and media …… I can’t sit among lie after lie and say nowt. It’s January and fuck 12 month of this. If there’s any advice from any cunter that peeled themselves off the fucking ceiling I’d appreciate it but really I think I just need to accept that it’s not the revolution that will be televised but the betrayal and switch off……..Squint out.

Nominated by Squint Cuntwood

Dominic West

Dominic West, the actor who I really enjoyed watching, when he portrayed Detective Jimmy McNulty in US crime drama The Wire, has unfortunately joined the ranks of other libtard actors and thus deserves a cunting.

Mr West recently suggested that the next James Bond should be played by…….wait for it…….a transgender actor/actress/shemale.

Why in the holy fuck? The character of Bond created by Ian Fleming is a notorious ladies man, who has no desire to play by his superiors rules and would no doubt be banged up for insubordination along with coerced sexual activities of young vulnerable women. Hero.

Anyway, Dom says that the above character should be played by some military officer woman who used to be a man……tell me how does that fit the character profile? First off, that would make JAMES Bond a woman, and I highly doubt a transgender actor would suitably play a serial womaniser. Also it should be noted that the person who he put forward for the role, isn’t actually an actor, she’s an officer in the army.

I’m fucking sick of liberal cunts fucking with institutions just so they can make them ‘inclusive’. Fuck off.

 

Nominated by Elboobio

Air Fresheners and Toilet Blocks

I would like to cunt my personal pet hate, air fresheners and toilet blocks. I fucking hate the sickly cloying pine fresh aroma more than the smell of wet dog and stale ashtrays. Unfortunately Mrs Magiccunt is very easily influenced by the power of advertising and rushes out to purchase the latest innovation in plug in scent dispensers or toilet deoderising systems. Just open the fucking window if you don’t like the smell of shit! And how the fuck am I supposed to know if there is blood in my bowel motions if the water is blue? The V.I.Poo adverts?!!?! How much does that fucking campaign cost? And I don’t want chemicals splashing up my arse when I’m playing sink the Belgrano.

This cunting is brought to you by Johnson and Johnson, a family of cunts company.

Nominated by Themagiccunt

‘Erro, Beeg Eeshoo! Beeg Eeshoo prease!’

‘Beeg Eeshoo’ Sellers

There was a time, not so long ago, that you’d see them in every high street and outside every supermarket. Decent, honest British pissheads trying to rehabilitate themselves and make a few bob by selling The Big Issue.
Then THEY arrived. Migrating predatory hordes from the former People’s Republic of Commietania, bent on snapping up every vendor’s pitch and driving the native population to the verge of extinction. Yes, they’ve tramped the length of Europe to take advantage of that big, brave new world of opportunity that is flogging The Big Issue.
Anyway, I came out of my local supermarket yesterday evening on the stroke of five, and there she was, resplendent in her national costume of headscarf, sleeveless padded jacket, ankle length skirt and trainers. As people passed she chanted out her litany with shit-eating grin soldered in place; ‘Allo, Beeg Eeshoo plizz, Beeg Eeshoo plizz…’.
Just then a sleek new Volvo came gliding to a stop, with a shifty looking type at the wheel and another couple of identikit women sellers in the back. She promptly grabbed her rucksack and jumped in, and the car sailed off. Mmm. Did I say something about taking advantage of opportunity? Well you can call me suspicious, you can call me cynical, but I spy with my little eye, something beginning with SCAM…

Nominated by Ron Knee