You hear a lot about ‘Conjoined twins’ .

It’s bollocks.

They’re two headed women as any carny will tell you.

Recently, a yank named Josh Bowling married Abbey Hensel.
She has 2 heads.
But josh is only married to one.

So when Josh is banging his wife he’s also rooting his sister in-law!

Far out.

This is apparently quite common in the states.

It’s kinky, weird, disgusting and a bit of a turn on admittedly.

Our very own Mr Cuntengine due to be going stateside will no doubt get in on.the action!

Have a look.
Conjoined?.
2 fuckin nuts.

Metro

Nominated by Miserable Northern Cunt.

Jesus Christ this is getting exhausting. Every day two new Swift articles pop up, her awkward pointy features in massive article headers, and titles kissing her arse and making her out to be the world’s greatest woman. Am i missing something here? I was under the impression that the BBC was supposed to be neutral and not prompted particular ‘products’, yet the continuous marketing campaign, is either for that theoried election psy-op, or her agent gave them a load of cash.

Anyway, the latest gutter trash article from the formerly renowned BBC is about two depressed ‘Swifties’ in their 30s (their THIRTIES. As if that wasn’t sad enough since her market is late teenage girls) looking for guidance from Miss Swift on relationship woes. Here’s a bit of advice, ladies, perhaps don’t go around in your 30’s calling yourselves Swifties and worshipping a woman famous for being unable to hang onto a man.

Apparently they’re finding solace in Taylor Swift being as hapless a failure as they are when it comes to forging successful relationships. The only difference is Swift has successfully turned break-ups into a lucrative business every time she releases a more-of-the-same song about getting over another ex. It’s so powerful that not one of those ex’s have given a shit.

The big takeaway from the article is that modern dating is hard (no shit) and that people are waiting far too long, are too indecisive and are wasting time. A lot of women, like the two in the article, end up as depressed, childless, husbandless, lost sheep with only the bottle for company. It’s a pretty depressing end to 60+ years of life. Yeah, that IS pretty depressing.

Of course they’re all completely blind and blame everything on men, completely without awareness that women shoulder likely over half of the blame for this mess. As for Swift, is it any wonder she can’t hold a man when she’s off touring for 90% of the year, and is an anti-Republican Country singer. Two things that go together like Macaroni and Chee…rios.

So to Taylor Swift, fair play…milk the idiots dry.

To the sad sacks still absolutely obsessing over her over the age of 23, it’s really time to grow up…

Oh, and to the BBC, fuck off because ‘other artists are available’.

Nominated by Migrane.

I’ve let you off without a link because it’s obvious to anyone who has looked at the BBC web page or turned on a BBC radio station that your assertion is correct. Though I cannot agree that she has a rat face C.A.

London mayoral elections are coming soon ” Whoop-dee fucking-doo”

The king goblin and his supporters are crowing about the pledge to supply free school meals for four years.

Now unless he has a star trek type replicator or he is friends with jesus it’s going to cost 500 million..

So how the fuck is it free?

Free health care, education and prescriptions. Isn’t that marvellous.
But it all costs money..

I’m sick and tired of politicians and celebrities taking credit for things that sucker taxpayers are funding..

“There ain’t no such thing as a free lunch”

bbcnews

Nominated by Barry zuckercunt.

In recent years with the rapid progression of Artificial Intelligence we have all heard the warnings about such advanced technology with job replacement by robots, bias in algorithms, too much power in too few hands to a Terminator Skynet-style end of the world scenario.

But before all that we have Saudi Arabia’s first AI robot called Mohammed, unveiled at an event in Riyadh and one of the first things he did was inappropriately touch a female reporters arse. Excuses were quickly made of a “technical glitch” and an “accident”. Is this fucker programmed to drive a taxi or pilot a small inflatable dinghy?

The Japs have had these things around for decades and do useful stuff like backflips, make coffee or cater to the depraved needs of the average sexually repressed salaryman living in a Tokyo shoebox who wears at nappy at the weekends God help us if the Afrocunts drag themselves into the 21st century. It would stab the nearest reporter with their pen and demand reparations.

YouTube

Metro News

Nominated by: Liberal Liquidator

 
“Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s Home Affairs correspondent Ron Knee reporting from Peckham, where protestors are trying to block the transfer of migrants from a hotel to the Bibby Stockholm barge. I’m joined by socialite and self-styled social justice warrior Araminta Heymer-Pratt; perhaps you could tell us why you’re here?”

“Well like okay yah. I mean, I’m not really sure and stuff, but like my besty Portia said it would be jolly fun, shouting ‘all migrants are welcome’, and knocking bobbies’ helmets off and shit, isn’t it? We’re like soooooo hoping to get arrested…”

“I see. Isn’t there something more constructive you could do, such as get a job?”

“Golly no. I mean, what good’s a third class degree in Gender and Diversity Studies in today’s job market? Besides *giggle* daddy’s soooooo generous with his ickle girl’s allowance. And you’re forgetting what you said yourself; this is like social and political activism to prevent the fizz (all coppers are bastards, by the way) from implementing oppressive state policies or something. These people can’t go to that place. Portia says that they can’t get a soy latté or an avocado dip there. It’s like worse than Austerlitz, and against health and safety and shit like that”

“I don’t mean to be rude, but you seem to have little grasp of the situation. For example, aren’t you concerned that unprecedented numbers of migrants are putting severe pressure on the supply of housing and access to the NHS?”

“Golly I mean I live in Hampstead, and daddy has private medical insurance for us all. It’s like soooooo not my problem”

“Then you wouldn’t be prepared to make a personal sacrifice by taking a couple of them in and looking after them yourself?”

“Oh we couldn’t possibly. We’ve only got five bathrooms, so we soooooo don’t have space. And mommy has an allergy…Oh corkers here’s my boyfriend Roddy in his vintage E-type. Isn’t she a beauty? Sozzers and all that, but must dash. We’re off to the Savoy for afternoon tiffin; the smoked salmon savouries are simply divine with a glass of champers…”

“So there you have it. Another day, another round of vacuous, trendy virtue-signalling. This is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”

Daily Fail

Nominated by Ron Knee with a second helping on this topic by Sixdog Vomit below.

I’d like a short sharp cunting for the protesters who prevented a coach from taking illegal cunts to the Bibby Stockholm barge in Dorset.

I don’t want them to be put on a barge in Dorset either, I want anyone who arrives here illegally sent home and their government billed. If you can’t provide ID and won’t tell us where you’re from we will assume it’s Gaza and drop you there.

Not these cunts though, they want the illegals to be housed and fed etc at everyone else’s expense as a reward for arriving here illegally.

If you’re an asylum seeker you seek asylum in the first safe nation you enter, you don’t cross continents and multiple safe countries.

Build camps for the cunts, call them concentration camps if you like, I don’t care.

The illegals stay in the camps, get fed three meals a day and a dry warm place to sleep and a field to exercise in. Leave the camp without permission and your asylum claim ends there and then.

The way the system works now just attracts more and more of the cunts. The protesters can all fuck off. They should pay to keep the cunts here if they love them so much.

Read it and weep…

bbcnews