Comic relief (4)

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Be fair… it’s shit isn’t it?

Every year the chuggers wheel out a load a load of puerile, cheap telly courtesy of the BBC. It ain’t funny, it’s just a load of people arsing about to part us from our hard earned cash. Nationalised chugging persuading us to give money to spongers, third world dictators and people in famine and war zones breeding children when they should know better. How do they manage it? Anorexics don’t have children – their bits shut down. So how the fuck do they manage it in these third world shit holes?

Sir Lenny fucking Henry FFS! The only knighthood he should be have would be one to keep his ears warm in bed.

Rant over. Won’t be watching. Won’t be donating. If everybody did the same, we could get shot of this crap once and for all!

Nominated by Dioclese

As if we don’t pay enough in taxes in contributions to the overseas aid budget It’s that time of year again when the biggest bunch of left-on virtue seeking wankers appears on our screens and airways, telling us to part with even more of our hard earned… crowds of nobs drive their cars around with stupid plastic appendages attached to the grill and others dress in fancy dress crap or bake cakes for ‘good causes’. Cunts one and all.

A quick look at the Red Nose Day website shows you those ‘good causes’ there’s a picture of ….lots of little sambos all smiling like heavenly angels for the camera, with a ginger cunt (Cordon?) but you can just see in reality the little peaceful ones are really thinking, I wish my brother mustapha had returned with the AK47 sooner…

The website even have the balls to tell you they are making a difference in the UK and Africa. FFS what is this obsession with helping the lazy good for nothing sand wogs and jungle bunnies. We tried for years – but you can’t help those that don’t help themselves. Why don’t we learn.?

And if that’s not bad enough the Beebistan Broadcasting Caliphate are using our licence fee money to run adverts promoting the whole sordid event every time there is a gap in programmes. The latest I heard on the radio this morning tells me to tune in Friday for hours of comic fun and entertainment. Really??? I’d have More fun pulling me own nasal hair.

The whole advert thing was scripted around ‘Sir Lenny Henry and invites us to enjoy the evening with the likes of Jo fatty Brand, that bird that was once in Doctor Who – Cunthrine Tait the oh ‘so funny’ mincing Grahcunt Nortone and Uber Cunt Russell Bland….

Hell of night that’s gonna be, fat dykes, gay Iorish fellas and a long haired tallentles uber cunt… Think I’ll spend my cash on a whiskey or too, so I can cultivate my own red nose.

Cunts.

Nominated by Leonardo di Cunty

Gareth Southgate

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Gareth Southgate is a cunt…. Apparently we, The English, must drop our ‘Island mentality’ and ‘learn from elsewhere’… Don’t know if that’s more anti-Brexit propaganda (he was probably prompted by the BBC)…. And even if he means in football terms, it’s done a fat lot of good so far, hasn’t it?… What with Sven and then Capello… Truth be told though, there hasn’t been a decent England manager since Bobby Robson, and that was nearly 30 years ago…

Nominated by Norman

Praising McGuinness

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We shouldn’t be surprised at the list of our favourite cunts who have queued up to pay tribute to the late great Martin McGuinness. The only thing we should be surprised at is that he’s never been cunted on here before!

Nicola Sturgeon released a statement on Tuesday saying that without his “hard and brave work to bridge the divide” that “peace would not have been achieved” in Northern Ireland.

Bill Clinton : “He believed in a shared future, and refused to live in the past, a lesson all of us who remain should learn and live by. May he rest in peace”

Tony Blair : “For those of us able, finally, to bring about the Northern Ireland peace agreement, we know we could never have done it without Martin’s leadership, courage and quiet insistence that the past should not define the future.” Apparently he had “genuine affection for the man I came to know and admire.”

Jeremy Corbyn declared himself “very sad” to learn of the death of McGuinness. IRA sympathiser John McDonnell said ‘bombs and bullets could unite Ireland’ and joked ‘gutless wimps’ opposed to Sinn Fein should have their knees blown off’

Alastair Campbell said “A great guy, a good guy, I liked him a lot” The same Alastair Campbell who said people who voted democratically leave the European Union were “Thick, fascist, racist, xenophobic cunts”

The list is endless. Even the BBC has sunk to new lows with this one and has been accused of ‘fawning coverage’. Jon Snow summed it up with “A great loss; an extraordinary life that culminated in great service”. The BBC coverage has been endless and never a bad thing to say about the man.

Martin McGuiness was an evil cunt. The only good thing about him is that he’s now a dead evil cunt.

Nominated by just about everyone who comments on this site

Michael Parkinson (4)

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Professional Yorkshireman Sir Michael Parkinson is massive bore. I see he is making a comeback on the telly selling Yorkshire Tea to follow his smash hit flogging insurance to confused old dears.

You can stuff your free Parker pen up your arse Parky.

What really pisses me off about this cunt is that he got his knighthood for 30 years on the fucking BBC sticking his tongue up celebrity arseholes. Did this creepy tosser ever ask a penetrating question in his life? All he ever goes on about is fucking Yorkshire, fucking Barnsley and Dickie fucking Bird. Don’t ever mention Gene Kelly or Muhammed Ali when this cunt is about or he’ll bore you to death.

Fuck right off Parky you wanker.

Nominated by Freddie the Frog

Samantha Bee

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Every fucker who voted for Brexit or Trump is a Nazi! That’s the go-to response of any libtard snowflake when they don’t get their own way!

In fact one yank (so-called) libbo comedienne Samantha Bee (nope, I’d never heard of her either) had a dig at young attendees of the CPAC convention (The Conservative Political Action Conference) by shouting “Nazi Haircut! Nazi Haircut!” at CPAC footage whenever a young white male appeared on the screen that didn’t look like some beardy hipster cunt (i.e. clean shaven and a well groomed haircut).

http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2017/03/09/full-frontal-host-samantha-bee-sorry-for-mocking-cancer-patients-nazi-haircut.amp.html

The story, however, only came to light after one of the boys labelled “Nazi!” turned out to have stage 4 brain cancer.

Whether the boy had cancer or not – tragic as that may be – is irrelevant to me. What gives this cunt the right to call anyone a “Nazi!” from just looking at some stock footage of a convention? Oh that’s right, because it was a “Conservative” convention and conservatives are fair game these days in the land of the liberal facists!

However, what would happen if there was a libbo snowflake convention and while reviewing the stock footage…

Every time a non-munter pretty libbo lady (a rare commodity it has to be said) came on-screen and the joke was to shout “WHORE!”?

Evertime a black man in a baseball cap appeared the joke was to shout “DRUG DEALER!”?

Or everytime a “peaceful” cunt appeared in a doylie hat and beard or a hijab and the joke was to shout “BOMB MAKER!”?

How do you think neo-liberal facists would respond to that! Exactly there’d be riots across the whole fucking nation!

But because it’s said by a libbo bint and is attacking anyone with a conservative point of view then that makes it all right then, and the libbo press and media excuse it off as a bit of “high jinks”.

Well Samantha Bee, it is NOT alright and you, and your vacuous TV programme deserve a thorough cunting! Consider this your nomination!

Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!