Evening Standard

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Me again – I’d like to Cunt George Osborne and the twats who write for the ghastly Evening Standard. It is a loathsome rag which can’t afford to charge anybody because no-one would bother buying it. It is infested with cuntish journos who ooze with sanctimonious self-righteousness, outwardly taunting readers who don’t happen to share their right-on, luv-a-freak, let-it-all hangout, Euro/Hackney/Camden Corbyn-loving bollox. In the dock on multiple trial stand Sam Leith, Richard Godwin, Rosamund Urwin, Nick Clegg and Matthew of Ancona. Twats the lot of them.

Nominated by Ben Philips.

Leaf blowers

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Cunting for leaf blowers and any fucking shitcunt that uses one.

Cunts start the fuckers up at stoopid o clock and proceed to blow leaves and dust from their fucking gardens and driveways out onto the street only for mother nature to blow the same fucking leaves and dust straight back as soon as said cunt with leaf blower turns his fucking back. But thats ok cos the cunts back at the same place and same fucking time a week later to go through the same fucking useless objective all over again.

Get a fucking rake you cunts, rake the fucking shit into a pile put the fucking shit into a bin bag and leave it for the fucking green recycling cunt to take away you fucking lazy bastards.

And the swish of a rake sounds lovely on a still autumn day.

Nominated by flexicunt

Dead Pool [86]

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Congratulations to Sir Limpy Stoke who correctly predicted that the comedian Ken Dodd of Diddy men and tickling stick fame would be the next dead dude.Dodd was 90 and had recently been in hospital for a chest infection and married his partner of over 40 years just days ago.R.I.P Doddy!

So on to Deadpool 86

Here are the rules (pay special attention to the first one):

1. Nominate who you think is the next cunt on the way out. You can have up to five choices. List your nominations in the comments of this post. It’s the current Dead Pool. Comments not in this post (e.g. in the previous one or other posts) will be ignored!

2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and we start again. Of course, you can always be a really annoying cunt and steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the previous pool (like Black and White Cunt frequently does).

Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored. Any anonymous cunt who can’t be bothered to make up a name for themselves will also be ignored. Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies.

Nominations are now open on this post only. AND BEFORE YOU NOMINATE, FUCKING READ THE EXISTING NOMS TO CHECK THAT NONE OF YOUR PICKS HAVE BEEN TAKEN ALREADY! Good luck

My nominations (Shaun of the Dead):
Leah Bracknell
Marieke Vervoot
Stefan Karl Stefannson
Manohar Parrikar
Colin Butts

Whoopi Goldberg [3]

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Whoopi Goldberg is a cunt…

Apart from being an untalented in your face exhibitionist cunt, Goldberg is yet another hypocritical cunt who claims to care about women who have suffered harassment or abuse, yet she is another Hollyweird cunt who has her tongue firmly place up a n@nce’s arse…

How can this fucker have the nerve to speak at a women’s march, but say Roman Polanski didn’t commit rape on a child and defend him to the hilt?!! Polanski was/is guilty as fuck and the whole world knows it… I know wimmin are liars and change things to suit themselves, but this is taking the piss… A lover of p@edo Polanski speaking at a march against sexual assault?! Why don’t they just book Maxine Carr for the next one and have done with it? What a joke and what a fucking cunt Whoopi is… Fuck off, Momma!

Nominated by Norman

Peter Rabbit, the bully

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I cant believe I’m actually writing this, but yesterday I had the misfortune of trying to keep up with what’s going on in this cunty world in the firm knowledge that something or other would make my piss boil. Maybe Junker the Drunker waddling about like the EU’s version of Sepp Blatter taking the cut out of everyone? No! It wasn’t that. Maybe Barnier looking about Downing Street like some elitist cunt being showed where Fagan once lived? No! It wasn’t that. Soros pumping half a fucking million into reversing the most attended democratic fucking vote this country has ever seen ( sorry Fred West )? NO!!

It that the fucking libtard snowflake cunts are boycotting Peter ” trap me / choke me / skin me / roast me / enjoy me whilst camping …Peter fucking Rabbit “… because it promotes…wait for it….. ” Food intolerance bullying ”

WHAT THE FUCK !!!!!!! The wee imaginary talking rabbit whom we see most days in 2D form on our national roadways looking like some posh cunts miniature bear rug spread out before our eyes as we thump over it at 60mph…flings some blueberries at some other pixelated cunt on screen that doesn’t like blueberries……… and off goes twitter in a fucking apoplectic meltdown on food alergy oppression and bullying.

“My wee bairn has a food alergy….. we will boycott this until Disney apologises”

Fuck me! I’m a Scot and we have an intolerance to almost anything you can call food!
If some cunt threw rice at a Scottish Wedding we’d all come out in fucking hives and rashes, rolling about the floor dousing ourselves in whisky and Irn Bru! So fuck off you snowflake, neo liberal, inferiority complex suffering fucks.

Cunts pure and simple

If I get 6 months to live from a doctor then unfortunately there is also others with that diagnosis because I’m going postal.

If we tolerate this then I’m afraid its not our children next, we’re next, its accelerating at an unstoppable rate

Nominated by Squint Cuntwood