I would like to Nominate “Wild” Swimming. Here is a link about it (warning, it’s the Grauniad)

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/jan/29/swimming-wild-trend-social-media-cliche

This mediocre hobby involves hipsters and beta males swimming in British streams and passing it off as adventurous. If you need to swim in cold, filthy water in order to convince people you are adventurous, then you probably deserve to have your clothes stolen by chavs, along with the inevitable viles disease from drinking the water. Instead of this feeble attempts at being interesting, why not actually do something interesting, and go scuba diving.

Nominated by: Angryman 

I heard this mentioned on Mike Graham’s Plank of the Week show.

Their coat of arms features a ship and during a council meeting, one of the cuntcillors noticed the ship and raised the issue that it could possibly be a slave ship.

An investigation has now been launched over this potentially heinous image, a great use of public money.

Nominated by: mystic maven

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9264175/Probe-launched-Hammersmith-Fulham-councils-coat-arms-racist.html

Superstitious savages are cants…

Just in case you haven’t noticed, some strange metal monoliths have started appearing around the world in the strangest of places, a desert in Utah, a field in Belgium, even on a beach in the UK. This strange phenomenon has been meet with wonder, curiosity and interest. However when mentioning the strangest of places one has cropped up on a roundabout in DR Congo and true to form has been attacked by a furious mob citing among other theories, satanic evil origins, so they promptly trashed it in barbaric pitchfork and torches style?

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-56112310

Fuck off!

Nominated by: TheBestRevengeIsLivingWell

I just know that all ISACers will be touched by the success of this Gambian asylum seeker-turned cushion designer who only charges €80 to € 95 per cushion which he has sewn with his own artistic hands. That £70 to £82 which I´m sure you´ll agree is very reasonable.

The Financial Times recently featured him and gushed that “If joy could be sewn and stitched with ruffles” then it would be found in one of Paboy´s creations. These come in mixes such as “Raspberry pink with mango-tree-green ruffle” and “Pompeii red with sandy-yellow piping”. His latest design is a “gorgeous Yves Klein blue and navy-blue combination”.

The good news is that Paboy is in Italy and is unlikely to turn up in your street offering his cushions. After two years attempting to cross the desert and Mediterranean and sleeping rough in Libya, he got a permit to enter Italy. In Naples, he found a “dormant Singer machine and some vintage fabrics forgotten under a bed” which led him to found his business. No, they did not fall off the back of a lorry. He now plans to expand into bedding, tablecloths and duvets and employ fellow migrants.

Gambia´s loss is obviously Italy and Europe´s gain but as Gambia is now a functioning democracy maybe Paboy will let us down and just go back home.

http://www.ft.com/content/11a8dc07-87ca-467d-a6ba-4577a75e1fd8

Nominated by: Mr Polly

JAY & DOM’S HOME FIX:

A BBC Golden Radish nomination please for the most blatant example of daytime TV penny-pinching since the almost-daily cheap “News Reports”.

Dom is Chinea and Jay, of course is the now you see him, now you see him again dark key wide boy, the black Del Trotter, Blades and each weekday afternoon between 1545-1630 they do this:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000scr6/jay-and-doms-home-fix-series-1-episode-1

It involves one of the cheap makovers or “repurposing” items with wood and bright coloured paint interspersed with “gems” from the archives – even today (February 17th) an excerpt from a 2003 episode of “Flog It”, which, though it ceased recording three or four years ago goes out nearly afternoon intact on BBC2. Oh, and Alan Tichmarsh from 2002. The newest item appeared to be a 2016 Money For Nothing.

Jay wears his intellectual black specs (no doubt acquired during his days as a “philosophy stoodent”) and Dom has a black shirt and an artisan beard and looks a bit like the late Michael Flanders.

There is cheao and there is shop-soiled with staiined packaging and a leaking tube, Jay and Dom belong in the 75% off bargain bucket in Poundland.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs