Maggie Smith


Wouldn´t be great to watch a film or television series without seeing this prune-faced old bag and hearing her strangulated Lady Bracknell voice?
She turns up everywhere and looks more like a midden bin full of ashes and fish bones that´s been left out in the rain every time I see her.

Fuck off you old strumpet – to Downton Abbey, Hogswarts or that shitty old van you lived in when you played a bag lady.

And take your decrepit old pals Tom Courtney, Pauline Collins, Billy Connolly, Michael Gambon, Judi Dench, Vanessa Redgrave, Bill Nighy and Joan Plowright who are always appearing in your films with you.

Give me Barbara Windsor (RIP)any day!

Nominated by: Mr Polly

Numpty Computer Users

Yes, this is another tedious IT Nomination, but one that really frustrates the hell out of me.

As you may know, I work in IT (self-employed), and over the last 24 months I’ve been rushed off my feet with new customers asking for help building their home-office IT setup. And even though I spend hours doing precisely this, along with providing them with e-guides & PDF docs on what you should and shouldn’t do, time and again I see the same people coming back to me a few days or weeks down the line to say that:-

  • my hard drive has failed and I’ve lost everything. What should I do?
  • I have a virus, and I’ve lost everything. What should I do?
  • I dropped my laptop, and its beyond repair. What should I do?
  • I think my login has been hacked, and now I can’t access my machine. What should I do?

Well, if you’d read my detailed FAQs in my Help Guide right from the off, you would know exactly what to do. Here’s just a few for starters….

  • Always install an antivirus/antimalware application, and keep them updated (free ones are just as good as paid)
  • Always use Two-Factor-Authentication (2FA) for important accounts/apps (especially on routers). Or at the very least a complex password/passphrase (with hint)
  • Always install the latest Windows x, Apple iOS, Android & Linux updates when they become available (Although with Windows 10, best put them on pause for 7 days given how shite they are at fixing things)
  • Never switch off local firewalls, especially when using your machine/tablet in a public Wi-Fi  hotspot, or for device tethering.
  • Always activate syncing between trusted devices so that if your primary device becomes unavailable your synced data should be available on your secondary one.
  • Never enable Remote Desktop Protocol by default
  • Never have too many Administrator Accounts on one device
  • Always user a password manager with online/offline access (LastPass, NordPass, BitWarden, Keepass, ZohoVault – are all free apps)
  • Always activate & encrypt backups, either locally to an external drive/flash drive, or to the Cloud (Google Drive, offers 15Gb for free, which is a good starting point)

All of the recommendations listed above I put into practice when I set their computers up in the first place. All they have to do is maintain each one by simply following the e-guide instructions.

Why people choose not to take on board such important advice is beyond me. They seem to think “Oh it will never happen to me, so I don’t need to bother with extra login authentication or backups. Far too nerdy, and I don’t have time anyway blah blah blah”

But when it does happen to them they’re almost on the verge of crying over the phone with their “I’ve lost everything” bollocks.

Personally, I don’t mind because its more cash for me (Just under £6k in Jan from domestic customers alone, £3k for Feb, and £3.5k for March so far). But it really isn’t rocket science to set these things up and maintain them, if only people would allocate some time and do it!

Nominated by: Technocunt

Naga Munchetty (4)

Once again Naga Munchetty has made the news with her badly handled interview with Gillian Keegan.

After trying to gain our sympathy with reports about her dislocated knee won no traction, she now misinterpreted what the minister was actually saying to her, and made it a bit personal.

Give her the long walk off a short plank, fgs!

Nominated by: Jessum Priest 

https://www.dailystar.co.uk/tv/bbc-breakfast-viewers-switch-off-23833464

Looters and Rioters

Another dark key resisted arrest and while being cuffed, arrogantly got back in his car. The cop (a female) threatened him with a tazering and it seems, accidentally deployed her gun instead. The cunt died as he sped off and crashed his car.

I believe it was an accident. Bodycam footage appears to support this. There is no fucking way, right now, that any cop would shoot at a dark key in Minneapolis. A honky? They’d blow his brains out without a second thought, but I digress.

Cue the expected response to this incident though. Thousands of dark keys (and a few honky Antifa types, but it looks about 95% dark key on the footage I’ve seen), devoid of any of the facts, take to the streets to attack the cops and to use this as an excuse to loot the local businesses.

I’ve seen recent footage of a white guy in America (with weed in his car) trying to speed off when cops stop him and ask him to get out of the car. The cop deliberately shot the man through the window about 3 times, killing him instantly. The cops’ verdict was the copper acted correctly. To see this footage, you’d need to go to Bitchute and type in ‘Emily Youcus’ for a long (and very graphic …be warned) video on black violence featuring government statistics and footage. Some of this lady’s opinions are not opinions I agree with, but she’s right on blacks being more violent than other races (even allowing for socio economic reasons for other races in the same income and social brackets).

Did white people take to the streets and riot when this honky was shot? I must’ve missed that one.

The facts show that in the US, that during arrest, white people are more likely to be shot by cops than black people. It was a black academic who pointed this out too. However, black people are much more likely to resist arrest, so you would expect more of them to be shot. Hmmmm.

The media never seem to point out that the dark key cunts who get shot, are always caught in the act of committing a crime and resisting arrest.

It’s about time this group of people took some fucking responsibility. Perhaps stop committing crimes could be an answer here? How about you stop glorifying crime, cop killing and looting in your ‘music’? Maybe, just maybe, resisting arrest isn’t a great idea with a cop with a gun? Remember, these cops go to work every day/night genuinely thinking it could be their last. Cops have guns pulled on them all the time, which is why they’re so ‘jumpy’ during arrests.

I notice though that here, the riot squads/National Guard were quickly deployed this time though. Tear gas and a few beat downs were given.

Good.

However, Trump would’ve been lynched for allowing the same. Under Biden it seems, the cops can do this. After Biden and his cronies were demanding the cops stand off and refusing Trump’s offer of the National Guard being deployed. Not now they’re in charge though, right?

Yes, it’s Yankeeland, but our thick cunts, with the help of our media, make sure the same shit will go on over here. The deification of George Floyd has been sickening and adds to this shit. His brother’s badly acted crocodile tears at the trial yesterday were a fucking joke. He went on about his ‘Christianity’ and helping those in his ‘communidee’ with prayer.

Not much kindness was shown to the Hispanic (notice NOT black) woman he robbed at gunpoint, eh. “He was turning his life around” they all say. Well, the cunt who he was in the car with when arrested with the take note had arrest warrants out for him and, when caught after going on the run, he gave statements which showed Floyd was slipping into and out of consciousness before Chauvin took him down (which helps Chauvin’s case). He’s now pleading the fifth (refusing to talk). With these cunts, the facts do not matter, of course.

My verdict? If you resist arrest you run the risk of getting yourself shot, you thick cunt. And if you think you can then riot and loot businesses every time this happens, then you deserve to be shot too.

Fuck off.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-56724798

Nominated by: Cuntybollocks 

Stephen Lawrence Day [2]


An emergency cunting for the crock of shite thought up by Treesa the Appeaser, Stephen Lawrence Day. Apparently it’s today…

Now don’t get me wrong. I have every sympathy for any young man murdered by a gang of thugs – regardless of their skin colour – and for the families that have to endure that loss, but certain things spring to mind :

(1) If I get my kid murdered by a bunch of thugs, does that mean that I get a peerage and get to sit in the House of Lords? No? Thought not.

(2) In the same circumstances would I get a memorial day for my dead son? No? Thought not.

(3) Would the reaction be the same if it was a white kid murdered by a gang of black thugs? Well, form your own opinions.

So other than the above, exactly what did Doreen Lawrence ever do so earn the same rank and privileges as Margaret Thatcher. Answer : fuck all, that’s what.

This really boils my piss…

Nominated by Dioclese