Bugger me (or not as the case may be) but yours truly has always regarded himself as a broad minded old cunt – minor public school, obligatory few terms at Eton before being sacked under a cloud then a decade or two tasting the fleshpots orf Europe and the Middle East before assuming the poisoned chalice orf inheritance, matrimony, progeny, stately home and servants. In short a well rounded old aristo who has seen it all and done most orf it.

But bugger me this telly fuckdoodle now orn Channel 4. Always been orf the belief that one lets the lower classes get orf as they are so inclined, keep a cap orn it so to speak so lorng as it is in private donchaknow. Really beyond the pale. Turns oit the host, one Anna Richardson is strapping orn the dildo for her ever loving partner and favourite orf this blog, Sue Perkins. More C4 crapdoodle necessarily follows. This “dating” show is played oit full frontal and full Brazillian (brings the tears to me eyes), and correct, not a pube to be seen (had a look at a 4K set in Curry’s just to be sure).

So full C4 then. Cut cunts and cock eyed cocks. Naked dykes and trannies, paraplegics and wooftahs, hairy marys and skins, the inked, the filed and clipped, all orf the rainbow nation orn display and looking for love orn HD TV. As we said in the ’60s. Let it all hang oit. A lot orf dangling. Fancy some horse radish on your beef ma’m?

Indeed me only complaint is that not all orf yours truly’s proclivities seem to be catered for. Must keep watching I suppose.

Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke