Not Very Good Christians

I have a friend. His now ex wife is very Christian. Bible based. So my friend accepted Jesus as ‘his Lord and Saviour’ and has proceeded to carry on as he always did -namely bolting from his house to go on benders, borrowing the money to do so because he has lost most of it gambling, taking absolutely no interest in his young son.

I could go on but I am conscious of a Bible verse ‘He who casts the first stone…’but take it from me he really is bad. Better say a kind of lovable rogue type. But really what takes the biscuit is he knows I am a Catholic and sits me down (invariably he falling off the sofa) and tells me where I am going wrong. I can see him now pointing to his head ‘the journey of faith is from here to here’ pointing to his heart.

I cannot but think that the ‘ease’ with which found faith is indicative of its superficiality. It has not gone very deep I believe.

I mean you have to work at it. Simeon Stylites sat atop a pillar for 37 years wrestling with the things of faith.You might think it a pointless but at least it took some EFFORT.

I anticipate criticism of Catholicism here. Often said you can drink and debauch then go go confession and you’re forgiven and you do the whole thiing all over again the next weekend. But once again there is some effort to get up and go. Whereas my friend just has to lift his eyes to heaven…

I don’t know what I am saying here or who I am criticising. Luke warm Christians I suppose.

But then my friend’s ex wife comes to mind. Oh she’s soooo Christian. She gave me a lift to work one morning. For small take I said ‘nice day?’ ‘yes I’ve been out earlier photographing the beauty of God’s creation’.

I am conscious once again of ‘He who cast the first stone…’ but I was always a bit of a Pharisee.

I know do it this way.

‘The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and left untried.’ Chesterton. Discuss.

‘I’d be a Christian if it wasn’t for Christians’. Was that Ghandi? Discuss.

My long dead brother- ‘it is only a veneer Christian civilisation’.
Discuss.

Nominated by: Miles Plastic

A red faced, just what the doctor ordered cunting please for this opportunistic arsehole, who, while trained at enormous public expense as a doctor preferred the easy life of politics, and became for 2 long years the MP for South Shields (didn”t that used to be ducky David Milliband’s mining ground?). In 2019, after many attempts to derail Brexit, South Shield, who vogted Leave, kicked the arsewipe out.

This year Dame Keir decided he would be ideal for Leave voting Hartlepool, and parachuted him on a selection list of one – with, as they used to say in the best comedy shows, “hilarious consequences”.

Despite visits to Hartlepool from the Dame himself (3 times) and Mandy Mandelson slithering round for 4 days this week – well you know the tragic consequences.

What boils my piss is that, unlike every other candidate, the snooty cunt didn’t have the decency to appear at the declaration:

https://www.aol.co.uk/news/labours-hartlepool-candidate-makes-hasty-123439723.html

Even his brother from the Monster Raving Loony Party stood there, after only gathering a few votes.

It is clear Starmer put him in place in the hope that if he won he would help Labour get the Brexir debate going. As it is Mandy is distraught and nearly had a turn on TV yesterday, and Adonis is calling on him to resign.

What a liar and coward Williams is though – his excuse was that he had to “take his children to school” – AT 5.00 IN THE MORNING?

Nominated by: W.C. Boggs

(PS. We do have a nomimation about Starmer (and Rayner), due to be published very soon! – DA)

Three dead after taking zombie spice drug, well all I can say is fuckwits who take drugs are cunts and get what they get, my heart bleeds I don’t think.

Natural selection has deprived us of having to support three useless fuck ups in my opinion and not a single fuck is given, these useless cunts probably claimed every benefit in the book anyway, so good fucking riddence in my opinion, fuck they and the drug mule they rode in and subsequently out on, druggies are cunts

Nominated by: Fuglyucker

URL provided by Dickie Dribbler, thank you

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/three-dead-after-taking-dangerous-24019606

I am astonished that nobody has nominated Elliot, formerly Ellen, Page.
First she announced that she was trans and queer as if anyone gives a flying fuck. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-55147975

Now on Oprah of course where else?https://www.bbc.co.uk/search?q=Elliot+Page&page=1 she’s treating the brain dead cunts who watch that shit to how she feels more like a boy now that she’s had her tits off.

Well, fuck me sideways, no shit you cunt! Then she/he/it makes the leap to trans people being stopped from playing sport and says that young people will die because if it.

No they fucking won’t you brainless cunt! If an ex-woman finds herself on the rugby field faced with a 280 pound prop forward she might though. And ex-men playing women’s’ sports? How the fuck is that fair?

This talentless cunt is/was, apparently, an actress/actor – I know I’ve never seen any of its films because I would have remembered puking – and it’s the only reason she gets on telly to spout this shit.

Have I said nobody gives a fuck yet? Even a much more famous cut and tuck, the one and only Cuntlyn Fucking Jenner disagrees with it on

sport https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-56960011 In between times it decided to divorce its wife. Clearly just being a tuppence licker didn’t get it enough attention.

Utter cunt, just fuck off.

Nominated by: SirCuntsALot 

My Employer “Don’t give a fuck corp” has concluded that with the scarcity of some retail materials and a lack of staff the workforce may be a little under the weather.

So after a massive brainstorming session they have gone on a recruitment campaign and slackening up our supply chain criteria…………….Have they fuck!

We receive “Stress busting” e-mails from some moron who eats fortune cookies.
Every day we receive helpful suggestions, “Turn you screen off for 5 mins every day” the system crashes at least once a day as it is or decides to install an update in the middle of a transaction.

“Get to know your colleagues” after 11 years there is very little I do not know about them, the guy who sits opposite does not sleep in the same room as his wife, he has one child who is a fucking moron, and I privately suspect that he is married to his sister, but its ok they have been sterilised.

“Go for a walk in your break”, this is one of my favourites as I rarely have a break and I cant walk that well, but its not as good as the other one.

“take a socially distanced walk with a friend” now apart from the walking issue I can somehow see the distance between us increasing as I shuffle along behind them so that’s a crap idea too.

They said something about crafting something to make you feel better, I have taken that one on and have made quite a nice shank from a ruler that I will try out on the prick who makes these e-mails up.

There that’s me done, off to shout at the pigeons now always feel better after that.

Nominated by: lord benny(not quite deceased, but close)