I would like to nominate amnesia for a proper cunting, as it seems that if you are a woman born any time in the last 50 years or so you suffer from a rather debilitating version of selective amnesia in which you all of a sudden remember hideous sexual abuse and harassment when your memory is remarkably jogged by either an Al-BBC reporter or a lawyer.

It seems that 67% of women have suffered some form of sexual harassment and then “got on with their lives” completely oblivious to the fact that it actually was abuse until the witch hunter comes a knocking, at which point, sometimes many years later, they suddenly remember the trauma and abuse and start blubbing and claiming a ruined life for something they previously hadn’t given much thought about, the poor souls.

There was a time when we used to be able to say anything to each other in the pursuit of chasing the opposite sex, flirting it used to be called. It was innocent and both ladies and men used to do it in the hope of having it off with someone eventually. Now it seems any kind of historical chat up lines can be brought to bear as harassment and sexual abuse. Amazing that something only matters when its given a label and a price tag.

With flirting and sex now off the table it appears the human race is doomed to die out, good fucking riddance i say, cos a world without paying compliments, flirting and, gulp, sex isnt worth saving.

My overriding worry in all this is that in primary school in 1977 me and Mary Smith played “you show me yours and ill show you mine”, so its only a mater of time now…..

Nominated by Detective Sergeant Cuntstubble.

Daytime TV needs a good cunting in my opinion.

Using up some holiday and I have to say what a fucking horror show daytime TV is.

Endless repeats of ancient Top Gear, Police Interceptors and Can’t pay, We Won’t Take It Away are the HIGHLIGHTS. When you did deeper the torture that can be found is amazing.

Move To the Country is a fine example, insufferably smug middle age cunts selling their 700k townhouse and sniffing at a huge country mansion, cunts. There’s also a version where the cunts are buying holiday homes in shitholes like Spain and Portugal where they’re not sure if it’s “quite right”….it’s Spain you thick as shit cunts, stray dogs and more dog shit on the streets than you can shake a stick at combined with British pensioners and chavs smelling of cheap perfume and chip vinegar.

Then you can move onto the ultimate terror…..daytime advertising, it comes on like every thirty seconds and all channels show adverts at the same time so there’s no escape.

I don’t have PPI so fuck off cunts.

I’m not injured so you can all fuck the fuck off too.

I’m not stupid enough for utter dross like the “Postcode Lottery” where council house mongs leer at you from the screen with their oversize novelty cheques.

The very worst though are those fucking Clear Score ads where the cunt continually checks his credit score and talks bollocks to his dog while his wife looks and speaks like she’s taken a massive does of Ketamine. Look you cunt, there’s no such thing as a credit score in the UK so take your dog, junkie wife and your shitty website and shove it up your arse.

No wonder there’s so many untaken days holiday if this slack jawed dross is all you have to watch.

Nominated by Spanky Mc Spank.