Polishing Fat Turds

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I would like to nominate polishing fat turds for a cunting.

I was recently in Germany on business and whilst waiting for the sky train to Dusseldorf airport (that part of Germany is a shit hole full of Turkish cunts by the way, avoid at all costs, honestly I’d rather go to Middlesbrough) and what do I see standing in front of me? Two “plus size” land whales checking their make-up and doing their hair for a selfie next to the sky train.

Walking (waddling) evidence that it is in fact impossible to polish a turd unless it’s been fossilised. Your hair and make-up don’t matter one jot when you’re as fat and ropey as Jabba the Hut after a monster sesh on the broon ale and kebabs.

These horror shows then have the nerve to complain when Asda can’t find a sailing ship canvas big enough to cover their arses.

https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/fashion-news/asda-hit-complaints-dressing-plus-23199201

Bad enough we have to literally orbit these cunts in the street!

Nominated by: Dr Geordie Cunt, I presume

Seconded by: Get Fucked Woke Cunts

As people are sooo fat do they really have gravitational pull. Is this why cyclists and cars and pedestrians have accidents. Should they affect insurance quotes.

the story continues.

Jussie Smollett [2] and Supporters

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Jussie Smollett and his Supporters

This cunt is desperately playing the victim card like I’ve never seen and why not? He has his dumb fuck fellow cunts supporting him for no other reason than his skin color and choice of cock holster.

This turd pusher has been fully exposed for the criminally racist cunt he is. His flailing and screeching in spite of his gig being up is bad enough, but now fellow cunts are coming out of the woodpile to lend open support. Most people would slink away in shame but this arrogant race baiter only doubles down. He expects the world to feel sorry for him because somehow his staged hate crime and being convicted for it make him a victim of racism.
The mental gymnastics are breathtaking!

To support this cunt is next-level cuntery. The blind reaction to scream “Racism!!” with every shred of evidence to the contrary tells us that there is NOT a desire to do away with racism. It’s too valuable and powerful to ever be done with it.

So we should never try to appease any of these cunts because there is no making them happy. Racism will never be allowed to die and false claims will always be used to threaten, shake down, cancel, or neutralize guilt.

On the good side, even casual observers will see this for what it is and hopefully the race card will loose it’s effectiveness.
May his career never recover and he reap every appropriate consequence for his horrible life choices.

I hope every appearance he makes will result in tanked ratings so he will be avoided like the plague.

FFS his sentence wasn’t any where near what it should be and probably because of fear of the accusation of “Raaaacism!!”

Fuck this unrepentant pillow biter and all who come to his defense!

Actress Taraji P Henson compares Jussie Smollet to Emmett Hill

https://mol.im/a/10609337

Nominated by: Meat Curtains

Free Range Egg Shortage

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Free range eggs unavailable from Monday!

Oh the shock. Oh the horror. What are Joycelyn and Jocasta supposed to have for breakfast?

https://amp.theguardian.com/world/2022/mar/18/free-range-eggs-unavailable-britain-avian-flu

From what I can gather, there’s been an isolated case of evian flu ( correct me if I’m wrong) (OK then, it’s “avian” – NA) and all farmers, egg producers, have had to isolate their free range birds. So from tomorrow, they can no longer sell them as free range.

Over reacting much, munch?

Nominated by: Jeezum Priest

Dead Pool [241]

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Congratulations to Deploy the Sausage who correctly predicted the next famous stiff would be Madeleine Albright the former US Secretary of State who died today from cancer aged 84.She was the first woman to serve in the role during the second half of the Clinton administration.Looked a bit like my Grandmother who is unfortunately unable to be picked as she is already dead and wasn`t famous.

On to Deadpool 241

The rules.

1)Pick 5 famous cunts you think will die next.It is first come first serve.You can always be a cunt and steal someone elses nominations from previous pools.

2)Anyone who nominates the worlds oldest man or woman is a cunt and will be ignored.

3)It must be a famous cunt we have heard of.

4)No switching names mid pool unless they have already been taken.

5)Please check your nanes havent already been nabbed as we cant be arsed to check.

Celebrating in Restaurants

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I’m rapidly running out of places to eat because I cross off places that sing happy birthday or some other shit to cunts who are celebrating.

We ate at a Turkish place last night and the fucking loudspeaker blurted out 4 times for some cunts birthday.

Sometimes a little cake with a candle on is presented and this is duly followed by clapping and cheering.

The recipients nearly always look embarrassed by it so why bother. Just let them eat their meal and fuck off.

If I’m not mistaken singing happy birthday is illegal anyway or used to be as it’s still under copyright.

Happy Birthday Copyright Link
(Fabulous link provided by – Part Time Admin – PTA)

I reckon that Marie Antoinette started it all. Fucking frog.
Sorry no link, it just pisses me off.

Nominated by: infidelgastro

Seconded by: Geordie Twatt

I’ll second this. Noisy bastards celebrating something not worth celebrating are complete cunts.

In particular I’d single out an authentic Burns Supper complete with piper for particular opprobrium. What the fuck is there to celebrate about a tax inspector who penned a bit of doggerel anyway?

Then there’s all that fuss about a bag of minced sheep’s offal, and some cunt in a skirt does his best to burst everyone’s eardrums. I know some people who subject themselves to this torture every year who even have no family connection whatsoever to Scotland, stupid sods.

Point of order, however. Marie Antoinette was Austrian, not French.