I’d like to nominate Judge David Fletcher for sending pensioner Maurice Snelling to jug for selling mince pies and wine at his shooting club during lockdown.

He did try to cover it up but hey cut him some slack – he’s old and has a heart problem. But no this denizen of the law wants him in chokey……

Nominated by: Rumncoke

(This is a fairly short nomination (see rule 3 of Nomination submissions. But since you’re new we’ll let it through this time – Day Admin)

Stoke Sentinal News Link

With supporting link provided by: Jeezum Priest

A well deserved cunting for the greedy grasping, expenses swindling bastards, who like to be known as “honourable ladies and gentlemen”, who have now been given permission to host Xmas parties ON EXPENSES!. As if the bastards don’t steal enough already:

Daily Mail News Link

This is on top of some of the bastards, like Rachel Reeves, Jess Phillips and – of course – Liam Byrne – claiming their gas and electricity bills on “expenses” as well, and of course Byrne famous for his fucking “Sorry there is no money left” note in 2010, made sure he really pushed the boat out by claiming more than £1000:

Inews News Link

In fairness, it has to be said that this greed has spread to Sunak’s Blairite party but Byrne, the great greasy heap of steaming shit, as ever claims more than anyone else. He has been a Birmingham MP for 18 years. The people of Birmingham are equal cunts for electing this bald bastard so often knowing his greed.

Dame Kweer, if he really is a man of great “integrity” needs t do something about his lickspittles.

It should be said that alcohol will not be able to be paid for with our largesse, but how fucking barmy do they think we are if we believe they won’t find their way around that proscription.

You would find more honest ponces in Parisian pissoirs than you do in parliament.

Sly News Link. (Latest developments – NA)

Nominated by: W.C. Boggs

I know we are often light hearted on here but the following harrowing tale puts things in perspective. (Go on, we’re listening – NA)

‘Staying here is intolerable’: the truth about asylum seeker hotels”

This concerns the dreadful treatment of Ali, who has fled religious persecution (??) in Iran, desperately crossed 8 or 9 countries to reach our shores.
He is banged up in a Berkshire hotel where:-

”The food is repetitive, his fellow guests never leave, the streets of Reading rarely change. “There is nothing to do. Nothing happens”

Yes, the racist bastards of Reading never change the streets for him.
He has been banged up here for 489 days with only complete freedom, food and a money allowance to cling to.

We should be ashamed of ourselves and can thank the Guardian for bringing this to our attention. If you open the attached make sure you have hankies at the ready.

MSN Link.

Another MSN Link. (Additional link provided by Jeezum Priest)

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble

WILLIAM HICKSON is a dozy Geordie cunt.

Hickson was arrested in Newcastle with 41 £20 notes stuffed into his sock. Now I know that Geordie slang for ‘pounds’ is ‘poonds’ but as far as I’m aware Newcastle has yet to issue its own currency – so notes with a value of 20 poonds on them would seems to be a bit obviously suspect.

Amazingly they had to call an expert in to verify that they were forgeries.

Words fucking fail me…

Daily Fail Link.

Nominated by: Rt. Hon. Dioclese

I recently did a job and was stripping down a treble wardrobe for a customer,
I asked him to pass me my screwdriver (bespoke, expensive)
And when he passed it me It was with horror I noticed he had long fingernails!!

I’ve seen this before,
Unclean fuckers who have talons like Diana Ross.
No excuse unless you’re a werewolf,
Or a Hindu fakir.

A man should have closely cropped nails
For working, and not some Draculaesque talons that can inadvertently scratch or puncture bystanders.
It’s incredibly ducky
And deeply suspect.

I took a instant dislike to this customer,
And although I remained professional throughout I did it with a air of contempt on my face.

These people should be forcibly shorn .

Nominated by: Miserable northern cunt

And supported by: David Cuntsbury

Oh my word yes MNC, I had to grab a vomit receptacle the other day when I inadvertently began to watch Time Team. There is a greasy, smelly-looking Dorset yokel (Phil Harding, presumably – Day Admin) on there who has been ‘developed’ by Channel Four to become a television personality archaeologist. In the early days he was very meek and quiet (just look for an early episode on Youtube), but somebody at C4 had a word and told him they’d have to get replacement archaeologist if he didn’t start to develop a noticeable TV persona, and now the cunt is so full of himself he’s set to burst all over Lefty Robinson.

What truly horrifies me though is the length of this human greaseball’s finger nails. They are longer than most women’s nails, and rather than looking scrubbed and clean, they look like he scoops them out with the C4 canteen teaspoons, or one of those revolting nail care penknives that your next door neighbour brings back for you from Malta. I appreciate his job isn’t one that attracts those with an on-site manicurist, but his dirt resembles aged faeces, tooth scrapings and armpit oil. He is a dirty, smelly, unhygienic cunt of a man, and is the reason I had to stop watching TT.