Just when you thought modern life could not get any more absurd, we now have ‘outrage’ and woke arseholes ‘literally shaking’ because of an “offensive” word in a new song lyric.

That’s right pop pickers, the output of da moosik biz is now being monitored for “ableist” slurs, reports the BBC:

https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-62376575

A number of questions race through my simplistic little brain. I didn’t know “ableist” was a thing. Is it? Since when has new pop releases been subject to such scrutiny? Who has the time or inclination to sift through the lyrics of every new release each week looking to be offended? The hurty word is only referred to as “the S word” (so we’re doing that now are we?), so I’m guessing it was “spastic” or a derivative thereof? It wasn’t that long ago we had The Spastics Society and those coin collection figurines outside shops of a little girl with leg braces. Not seeing the problem here.

Since we’re in the territory of policing song lyrics and demanding reparations, apologies, public floggings, etc. how about we also go after all the black/rap “artists” who continually use the “N word” in their lyrics? The same lyrics which also promote promiscuity, violence, killing police officers and partaking of illegal substances? Hmmm….thought not.

My favourite quote though was from some random bellend on Twatter called Stephen Callum (yeah, me neither, but he does state his preferred pronouns – quelle surprise):

“Language is such a complex thing and words can validly mean different things to different people, but I don’t see why any artist would use a word in their song that causes so much upset to millions worldwide.”

Brilliantly defeating his own argument in a single sentence. Classy.

Nominated by: Imitation Yank

With a second verse from Chuff Chugger

The ‘offensive’ word used was Spaz, which in Blick language is ostensibly used in a colloquial way to mean going crazy or wild, which is derived from “spastic”

The lyrics in question were: “Spazzin’ on that ass, spaz on that ass.”

All a load of fucking shite bollocks

Emergency cunting for dumb public cunts who run or cycle alongside athletes on pavements during the marathon, triathlon or events held on public roads.

The other day I sat down to watch the Commonwealth Games marathon and triathlon events. During both spectacles I watched two daft cunts, both with phones in hand, run alongside athletes on the pavement as the individual athletes approached to take selfies and, I’m guessing here, put on social media under “Look at me running along with this athlete like a cunt”.

Back in the day I represented Scotland at international level in a team sport and at our best we gained a European silver medal and came 7th at world level.

I trained hard, it took four years of hard work to get to that level for the Europeans and worlds (and no – no government funding as we were classed as an amateur sport – funded it myself, don’t get me started… £25k of my own money…..) and did not appreciate cunts running alongside me, and asking for selfies when I was training.

Simply, when I see these daft cunts run or cycle alongside an athlete it makes my blood boil as I have a sudden urge to smash each one hard in the face. It is a mixture of vanity, disrespect, and utter annoyance. From someone who spent 12 years at international level don’t run beside athletes on open roads. Cheer them on instead you cunts.

Nominated by: Raiders of the Lost Cunt

Spacca cyclists.

The Commonwealth Games have started and, unlike the Olympics, the spaccas have their go while the proper athletes do their thing. I sort of have no iss … well actually I have many.

There was a Norn Iron swimmer interviewed last week in the build up and she has a learning difficulty and therefore is able to get a spacca qualification. To summarise, she has problems with her short short term memory. Right, so she’s a bit dim, which is why she is not an elite swimmer.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bethany_Firth

But what what really got my my goat was the tandem sprint/time trial. If you’re blind what the fuck are you doing on a bike? And I’m assuming the Gordon Brown is on the back, not on the front. One of these non-seeing fuckers had a lead rider who was twice the size of him. How the fuck does that work?

Raspberry fucking cunts.

Nominated by: Dark key cunt

Here we go again.

”RFU will open investigation into racism at Newcastle Falcons after Luther Burrell claims”

Another ex player, and the ‘ex’ is significant, suddenly claims racism in his sport.

”Burrell, who won 15 caps for England between 2014 and 2016, gave an interview to The Mail on Sunday last month in which he claimed that racism was “rife” in rugby union and that he had been called a “n—–” and a “slave” by teammates.”

Funny how none of this was an issue 8 years ago. Is it compo setting in? Revenge for being dropped?
Fuck me when I played colour was the least of your problems. Abuse was constant and god help you if you were ginger.
He should look warily at the oily little parking stanley who tried to destroy Yorkshire cricket and see what a glittering career he now has.

Guardian Link.

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble