I used to enjoy Ben Elton – for ‘The Young Ones’ and ‘Blackadder’.

I believe he’s now making a comeback stand-up tour, since he’s apparently doing the media rounds of plugging it; maybe someone out there thinks he’s the right person for these times.

I stumbled on his 17½ minutes with Matthew Wright on Talk Radio’s YouTube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaQK9yROwm8

I had actually just watched the excruciating interview between Lisa Nandy and Mike Graham when the above video thumbnail popped up on the right-hand-side column. The click-bait that drew me in was “Comedian Ben Elton talks Brexit and Boris Johnson”. For those of you who can’t be bothered to watch it, I’ll give you a little critique, but before we go there, here’s a clip from a 1986 performance on Channel 4 as a reference point.

Only one and a quarter minutes in and we’re hearing allegations of crude sexual misconduct involving President Ronald Reagan and the Russians. I guess nothing really changes, does it?! This is Left-Wing material from 33 yrs ago. Just let that sink in.
Now back to the present-day, Ben Elton has aged but he’s still a motormouth (like John McEnroe but without the charm or wit). Oh, and Matthew Wright is still an obnoxious twat, so no change there either!!
With all that out of the way, here’s your viewing guide (WARNING: it reads like the class notes of an A-Level Politics student):

– A gentle, earnest start as he describes being blamed for the invention of Political Correctness.
– Caring, SJW-credentials wheeled out with compassionate voice at 0:13: “Political Correctness is normally just good manners”. That’s right, Ben, only with a Marxist agenda to subvert and manipulate.
– A discussion Led by Wright, about PC bullshit for a couple of minutes, then ‘new-book-what-you-just-wrote’, led by Wright.
And that’s when the triggers start to come thick and fast:

2:26 – No British cultural homogeneity
2:29 – ‘The Wall’
2:31 – Scottish Independence
2:33 – Brexit
2:37 – Identity Boundaries (apparently what most people are thinking about)
2:52 – Cultural division of Britain into virtual communities (Hello, Plebs!)
6:18 – Donald Trump
7:18 – Donald Trump Lies
7:21 – Climate change
7:57 – Racism & sexism
8.53 – NHS
9:52 – Identity
9:54 – Brexit
12:30 – Faatcha (an oldie but goldie. Hear him say – direct quote – “I always had a lot of respect for Mrs Thatcher”)
13:04 – Boris Johnson (here comes the new material, everyone)
14:00 – Putin
16:17 – Prorogation (the MENDACITY to call an election BEFORE Brexit)
16:42 – Crashing out

Seeing how Ben’s only had 33 years to come up with new material, I think the man deserves a word of praise and, to be fair, he’s entitled to his opinion. And if any of you might feel that Ben’s message is hackneyed and jaded, just remember there’s a new generation who haven’t discovered him yet (think Corbyn). It’s just that the the older generation hasn’t forgotten him yet. I’ll leave you with two classic examples of his schoolboy humour:
Q: Why shouldn’t you answer the front door in your pyjamas?
A: Because Chernobyl fall-out
and
Q: What’s pink and hairy, and hangs out of your pyjamas?
A: Your Mum

Nominated by Cunt me in

I’d like to give this regional weather reporter a fuckin’ good cunting.

Now, he might not be known by many and that’s why a quick look at the clip below will put you in the picture:

https://ilovemanchester.com/bbc-north-west-tonight-weather-presenter-owain-wyn-evans/

This notorious shirtlifter is also known to people in Yorkshire and the Midlands. He’s a fuckin’ mincer of the highest order and makes Tom Allen look like Charles Bronson. When he’s giving the forecast, his fuckin’ arms are waving all over the place.

He said “I do camp it up sometimes doing the weather, but I don’t even notice I’m doing it, when I’m waving my arms around”.

After reporting on a Fun Run, one of the other presenters asked him would he join in to which he replied “I can’t really run”. You would you cunt, if I stuck this red hot poker up your arse. And don’t stop till you and your boyfriend get back to Wales where you can wait for the next cold front to kick you in the cunt.

Nominated by Bertie Blunt Ubercunt

Oliver Letwin…

Boris’s deal may have been a bit shite, but Letwin the cretin has got his revenge on Boris for sacking him with his ‘Brexit blocker’. In short, even if we get the best deal ever, the Remoaners can now delay it. Forever.

What a pathetic, vindictive little cunt. Throw him in the Thames!

Nominated by One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Cunt

A special Saturday cunting please for this old fuckwit who has meddled yet again and forced yet another delay to Brexit:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/uk-politics-50107443

What a pity the old motherfucker doesn’t get his arse off the green benches right away, fuck off home and entertain some rough trade in his home at 5.00 in the morning. I am sure he has the money – why else would a rentboy drill his raddled old ringpiece?

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

Oliver Left-TIT and all those Remoaning MPs holding us and our government captive.

What an utter bunch of devious cunts of the highest order. Elected under a manifesto that they had absolutely no intention of sticking to.

Boris’s attempt is shit, but voting to delay inevitably is a Cunt’s trick.

Utter BASTARDS!!!

Nominated by Blimpo

A nomination for self-confessed idiot Steven Smith, who thought it would be a spiffing wheeze to get his mate to squirt pepper spray in his eyes – because he didn’t think it would hurt.

He thought he’d blinded himself after he pulled the stunt, using a £3 spray he bought online from China. After getting an unnamed pal to squirt it in his face, dad-of-three Steven turned the spray on his mate – before they both doubled over in agony. Postman Steven from Widnes, Cheshire, said the pair couldn’t breathe properly or open their eyes for 20 minutes. Asked why he did it, he said he thought it “wouldn’t be that bad” but admitted it was “the worst pain I’ve ever felt”.

His unnamed mate is a cunt too.

Nominated by Mystic Maven

Yes, you thought there were some things the modern world couldn’t intrude on……there are some things the snowflakes can’t touch. Think again my friends. Now we have Christmas trees for our bent community.

They’re not real, of course, but is anything real these days? Yes, artificial trees decked out in the rainbow colours. Available from Amazon at £196 a pop. You should get one…….they’ll last for years and you don’t want the ‘Thought Police’ kicking your back door in (oooh, cheeky) on Christmas Day do you?

Jesus Christ! He was gay as well you know? Seriously. Fucking fact.

Nominated by Freddie the Frog