Can I nominate young blokes with beards for a cunting please?

Seriously, did your Dad’s old photo album not teach you anything about poor fashion choices that you think facial hair is anything that remotely hints at being a good idea? I have no clue why trying to make your chin look 80 years older than the rest of your face is currently in-vogue among the metrosexual beta male, but exactly how attractive is it to the opposite sex to have a head like a 1970s vagina? Not discounting the fact that the beard is always about 3 shades further into the red spectrum than the hair on their heads. How can this be?

Call me old fashioned, but apart from giving the impression that they are maths teachers, art historians or fugitive kiddie molesters, the only reason young blokes should sport a thick grizzly beard is to hide an acute dose of herpes.

Nominated by Megacunt.

(Note:This is not an actual picture of her as far as I or anyone else knows)

A short Cunting for Aqueelah Khusheed.

This a mother of 4 from Nottingham whose 12 year old son. Rahjs Wajid was given the choice of washing pots or detention after several instances of misbehaviour. He chose washing pots,but broke down in tears in his mothers arms after this dreadful punishment had been completed.

His mother has accused the school of slavery and is consulting a solicitor because she believes that his human rights have been abused..

What an ungrateful grabby bitch. She should have disciplined her brat,and thanked her lucky stars that she lives in a country where education is free for her tribe,along,no doubt,with housing,benefits and anything else she can get her greedy claws into.

Typical scummy,greedy,selfish behaviour from another ungrateful “Cultural Enricher.”

Nominated by Dick Fiddler

Emergency cunting for lard boy Watson. I know it’s pretty much a given that if you’re going to Glastonbury you have to dress like a cunt, but Watson has really plumbed new depths of sartorial cuntitude as the photo above bears witness. Look at the ludicrous three-quarter length jeans with the exceptionally low-slung crotch (I’m guessing the inside leg measurement can only be around 9 inches), the slip-on casual shoes that look like they’ve been ordered from those little catalogues that fall out of Sunday newspapers, and the flattering powder blue short-sleeved polo shirt: surely only a monumental cunt would be seen in public dressed like this. But for me, it’s the choice of hat that screams “NO ONE IS A BIGGER, FATTER CUNT THAN ME” – didn’t The Beverley Sisters wear caps like this in the 1960s? And as MailOnline might say, “The Deputy Labour Leader flaunts his flab by daring to go bra-less at Glastonbury”…

Nominated by Fred West.