A new low for humanity with this case; an evil sick cuuunt went up to a 9 month old baby in a park and drenched it with a thermos of hot coffee, causing horrific pain and burns, then ran away, leaving the mother utterly distraught.

The world seems an increasingly violent place. Stabbings, murders, stonings, beheadings, depending on where you live.

The rational part of me puts this increase down to increased population, therefore more bad apples in the gene pool. Another part wonders if Satan himself has let loose legions of demons, possessing people to commit random and deliberate heinous acts.

Soon The Daily Mail won’t have any space left for the sleb gossip column; it’ll just be stories about murders and stabbings with ads.

Daily Fail

Nominated by Cuntologist.

Mrs. Yank and I like to eat out occasionally. It’s often a mine field because many establishments cannot be fucking bothered to actually disclose what is in, on or to the side of their menu items.

Certain allergies aside, there are some things we just don’t like and will not eat. Let’s consider some examples.

Pizza (*).
The takeout variety is usually safe, but dine in Italian eateries are very fond of sprinkling parmesan cheese on everything. Parmesan cheese smells like vomit (be honest) and probably tastes similar. As such it will not pass my lips. Do they mention this crap on their menu or give you the choice of not having vomit sprinkled on your food? Nope.

Tex Mex.
We like queso which is sometimes described as a “3 cheese dip”. That’s great, but which 3 cheeses, FFS? In a Tex Mex place, it’s unlikely to include parmesan, but gouda is equally as revolting and needs to be banned. If ordered, it can sometimes show up as queso blanco which is not the same thing. Plus it might have other nasties in it (e.g. onion) which Mrs. Yank can’t touch. Were any of these surprises mentioned on the menu? Nope.

Burgers.
Yanks are in the habit of adding all manner of diabolical shite to burgers. It’s a known fact (recognised by international law) that mayonnaise comes from the devil’s arse crack having been fermented in herpes rich untreated sewage. If you add depleted uranium to it, you get salad cream (true story). Anyway, not everyone in the world likes mayonnaise and yet there is it on your burger, completely unmentioned on the menu. Another common practice is to serve a burger and fries with a fucking pickle (gerkin) on the plate. Pickles are of unknown origin, but are believed to be the decaying genitals of ancient civilisations from across the galaxy which somehow enter the Earth’s atmosphere and land on people’s plates at dinner time. Complete with some vinegar infused juice, probably some ancient lube used for ancient bumming. Does the menu mention the dangers of pickle and lube juice co-habiting your plate? Nope.

After the surprise and the resultant complaint, some dishes can be re-made. But then you’ve got awkwardness, the delay factor and possible ‘tude from your server. Other dishes can have the offending item(s) taken off and the plate of food returned to you. The problem here is, if your food were on the same plate as a dog turd, would taking the dog turd off the plate still make the food edible? I think not.

Sometimes it’s just not worth the hassle if you have to clarify or have removed 3 or more things. You know they’ll forget and get it wrong, so you might as well eat somewhere else. Home for example.

(*) I’ve spent a lot of time in Italy and what passes for pizza in the UK/US contravenes the trades description act. If you know, you know.

Nominated by Imitation Yank.

are a cunt.

(The latest government who are very, very keen to rush as many things through without even the token vote due to parliament being closed)

Not content with the indoor smoking ban (my personal belief is that it is mostly a good thing in most places but pubs should be given the option to declare themselves a smokers pub) they now want to rush through a smoking ban covering beer gardens in pubs too.

Pubs are the cornerstone of British culture, a place for villagers and workers to meet and chat over a few pints of ale, or lager for those who have no taste, or Guinness for those who buy into that nonsense.

The pub, the last bastion of free speech where unlikely stories of a bloke down the pub said such and such.

The smoking ban killed off many, very nearly killed off many more, Pushed up prices to make up for lack of footfall.

So now they want to ban smoking outside. Smoking areas, beer gardens, OUTSIDE, in the fresh air where taxpaying adults choose to stand/sit to smoke their tax paid smokes.

Nah, this is clearly a targeted attack on drinkers which is haram.

bbcnews

Nominated by Cunt of Peeblesshire.

Put your hands together (clutching your valuables) for today’s BBC hero, “Ross” described as a “prolific shoplifter”. After 15 convictions and stealing goods worth hundreds of pounds every day, he still hasn’t been to prison (perhaps because he didn’t shout at a police dog?).

What makes it worse is that he “stole to order” – I wonder if this will become a new way of life, when the cost of Net Zero catches up with us?. I will have to get a poachers pocket put into my blazer to get my Gillette Fusion blades (and they are expensive enough already). Perhaps the government will give him a small business start up (clearly daily shopping lists take a great deal of time) – or perhaps Rachel Reeves will just “accidentaly” drop a tin of John West salmon down the leg of her drawers. Kweer won’t have to worry because his sugar daddy buys all bis clothes for him, but Ross might be able to help out with cans of beer.

bbcnews

Nominated by W C Boggs.