are a cunt.

Wolverhampton Council have introduced a “fat tax” on burials for obese persons, due to increased demand, of all things.

Wolverhampton resident Rosemarie McLaren said she felt the move was “discrimination, it’s not acceptable”.

“Someone like me who’s a bit bigger, is going to be charged [more] because I’m fat,” she added..

Unsurprisingly Rosemarie is a twenty stone Dark Key.

It appears that cremation has never occurred to them,but then again,why wait til the fat cunts die of natural causes,such as an excess of Di Chiggun?

Light em up!

bbcnews

Nominated by Unkle Terry.

are a cunt in many cases.

Fucking hell where do I start…I don’t know, this one twists my melon, Counterfeit chocolate, what the fuck is that? any way.

The old corner shop is due a cunting, always there for those little things when you need them.
Though nowadays it seems they just scan winning lottery tickets and tell you that you have lost, Mr Kapoor has taken it to the next level with a vast array of illegal stock he bought from “John” and supplying minors with prohibited goods.
The article made interesting reading.

Edward Elton, on behalf of Surrey Police, said: “A man attended the store because his 17-year-old son, a child in law, had bought £530 of nitrous oxide from the Wharf Road Stores, and he’d done that in one day.

so that’s one pissed off adult, £530 spend in one day on laughing gas to a minor.

The list of breaches said to have been found within the store, he continued, included soft drinks with unlawful additives, best before dates on alcohol rubbed off, box after box of counterfeit cigarettes and counterfeit chocolate.

This counterfeit chocolate brings to mind this

his dodgy fags made of shredded doormats are another matter entirely
Then we have,

He said that was “just the latest of the failings”. On other occasions Surrey Police found two canisters behind the counter that were seized and sent for testing, tests came back confirming they contained the psychoactive drug THC.

So he was selling class B and C drugs from behind his counter and topping it up with Stanley knives! and the place is next too a sodding youth club.
You just cant make this up.

The good news is he is “Very sorry” and his licence has been revoked, but fuck sake how can he get away with it?

He said the Class B drugs were marked as ‘not for sale’ and left in the back of the shop unused. Mr Kapoor added: “I have my parents who are already dependent on me, my dad is over 85, my mum also”, before having to pause when becoming visibly emotional.

That’s not a bad idea, I will have to right “For decorative purpose only” on my favourite prohibited items, just in case.

ant way fuck sake, what have we brought upon ourselves.

youtube

Nominated by Lord Benny.

is a cunt

Worrying about hamas’s copyright on Oct 7 massacre footage.

No fucking way, right?

Mentioned it in passing lately, not many saw it… Toronto Film Festival were due to screen a documentary about the events that kicked off the current bout of munitions lobbing in sunnier climes but have pulled a U-turn on it.

Why?

“Toronto film fest nixes Oct. 7 doc screening, cites Hamas ownership of massacre clips”

Shit the cunts livestreamed for all and sundry at the time on various terroristy file-sharing webshites I mean sites …. and TFF are scared of – presumably – being sued for copyright infringement.

Beyond ridiculous. And cowardly. n.b. Some more mainstream sites(e.g. NYT) carried the same story, but only this one not paywalled.

Times of Israel

Nominated by Cuntemall.

is a cunt.

Spare a thought for man-bun hipster soyboys Hugo and Josh, cunters. Finding a £7-a-third barrel aged mango and pineapple blancmange New England IPA is getting harder and harder as oh-so-cool Brewdog has finally been found out. Fewer and fewer pubs are stocking their overpriced rat urine.

The Ben & Jerrys of beer have never missed an opportunity to leap onto the latest passing woke bandwagon to demonstrate their cool, bien pensant credentials. Which makes the fact that their shitshow is now dependent on Wetherspoons and their Brexit-supporting boss Tim Martin all the more ironic.

Come on Tim, chuck the cunts out of your pubs as well and hopefully they’ll go bust. Hugo and Josh will just have to hold their noses and mix with all those ghastly Reform voters in Spoons in future. It’s no wonder they’re in tears.

the sun

Nominated by Geordie Twatt.

is a cunt.

Go on cunters, admit it. You hoped that you’d heard the last of the notorious Wee Jimmy Krankie look-alike after her desperate and spectacular fall from grace as Scotland’s First Minister.

‘Fraid not. The chunky little chancer is still seen hanging about Holyrood very occasionally, still trousering her MSP’s salary for seemingly doing very little. But lately she’s chiefly out and about on the promo circuit, desperately trying to drum up enthusiasm for her memoir ‘Frankly (or how I shafted Alex Salmond)’. No doubt stacks of these volumes will shortly be making their way to remainder bookshops and charity stores near you. Snap up your copy while stocks last.

But that’s not the worst of it, no. Get this; wee Nick Nick is talking about leaving behind the bagpipes and misty mountain land of her fathers, in order to seek some anonymity away from her goldfish bowl life in Scotland. Her persistent self-promotion notwithstanding, she’s claiming that the constant glare of being in the spotlight is all getting a bit much.

Whence might some solace be sought, I hear you ask? Perhaps lost among the teeming millions of Paris or New York, or in the quiet stillness of the Alps? Er… well no. Apparently Wee Jimmy, who has spent much of her life as a professional berater of England and the English, now spends a lot of her time in London, and is thinking of moving there. Dr Johnson’s noble prospect of that high road south does indeed beckon.

‘England is not yet a foreign country, would never be a foreign country, obviously even when we’re independent’ burbles Krankie, somewhat confusingly. Funny, but if Scottish independence is ever realised, here’s one Englishman who’s under the impression that England will indeed be ‘a foreign country’ to Scotland, just as much as France, Switzerland, or anywhere else for that matter. But then I don’t think that Sturgeon ever figured out just what independence for Scotland would REALLY mean in terms of its future status vis-a-vis the remainder of the UK. I think she thought of it somewhat in terms of the Markles’ ‘half in half out’ arrangement with the monarchy; keep the good bits, ditch the bad.

Personally I’m not enamoured by the prospect of some hypocrite who’s made a career of moaning, whingeing and bitching about the English moving south to take up residence, so as the wife would say, ‘get tae fuck Krankie’. Scotland’s fucking welcome to you.

the courier

Nominated by Ron Knee.