It’s time for my compulsory annual GDPR online training course, after which completing, I shall destroy my workstation with a hammer and kill the next three layers of management. It’s that fucking bad. The brain bleeds at the sheer unnecessary waste of time and cognition required to click through the pages and sub-pages of jokily illustrated guff….illustrated, yes, with cheaply animated pictures of ethnic wimminz with watermelon smiles, in office garb, haunting every single fucking page. Obligatory, that.

Assembled by an external consultancy no doubt making millions from this utter waste of time. Millions urgently needed elsewhere in my organisation, in my area of which necessary funding has dried up completely.

Do I have access to sensitive personal data? Do I fuck. I’m not management. None, zilch, nada. Do I need a detailed description of the law as it applies to free ballpoints with the customer’s name on?* Are any of my colleagues coloured? No. Are bad actors fully trained in the art of extracting data from networks without my accidental help? Yes. And they didn’t need to do this shit course either.

Allow me to cunt the gradual replacement of on-the-job commonsense by online “training” courses sold to gullible management suits by corporate scammers, to the frustration of the victims and to no useful end whatever.

* I made this up, but you get the idea.

Nominated by Komodo

POSTING PERSONAL DETAILS IN YOUR COMMENTS AND NOMINATIONS IS UNACCEPTABLE AND WILL RESULT IN YOU BEING BANNED FROM THE SITE.

THE SAME APPLIES TO INCITEMENT TO PERSONAL VIOLENCE. THIS IS ACTIONABLE IN LAW, SO KNOCK IT OFF NOW!

I thought long and hard about making this nom and apologise for the somewhat sombre tone of it.

I think it’s pretty fair to say that solitary confinement is a cruel, sadistic and inhuman form of punishment. And yet we have our government enforcing it on it’s subjects who have broken no laws.

Please note I am not downplaying coronovirus in any way, shape or form, it’s a horrible disease and I have every sympathy with people affected by it. I’ll use myself as an example – again, I am not trying to evoke anyone’s pity just attempting to put a different perspective on things.

I live on my own. I have a brother who is many miles away and the rest of family and my friends are an equal distance away in the opposite direction. My parents are both deceased and I have no children. I don’t mind living on my own but my one method of escape was visiting the pub. I could meet people even if I didn’t particular like them but at least I was interacting. Unfortunately that little avenue of pleasure has now been closed off.

However I can go to the supermarket and get closer then the arbitrary 2 metres of the checkout girl to pay. Couldn’t this girl just as well be the barmaid at my local? The pubs stayed open during the Blitz for fuck’s sake. Anyway, I’ve drifted. Being on your own with no other human contact your mind plays tricks. You start thinking about all sorts of things which really don’t make any sense.

I’ve re-read some of my posts here and realise I wouldn’t have made them under different circumstances – apologies to anyone who’s taken offence. I always read Isac’s own Mike’s Place excellent blogs and there was one where I think he stated that suicides went down during the Blitz. However, I can see the reverse happening if this lockdown goes on for much longer. Please note, I repeat I am NOT wallowing in self-pity and rest assured I will not add to the suicide rate. Hopefully we can get back to normality asap and get the fucking pubs open!

P.S. Admin, I have no objection if you feel this is too miserable and morbid to post but I’m just glad to have got it off my chest.

It is not morbid, some of the cunts on here have survived a lot worse, it could be a group therapy thing.

Nominated by Cupid Stunt

Sheila Oakes, labour councillor is a cunt. This fat cunt will die if she gets China pox but is perfectly happy wishing death on those she doesnt agree with, and Boris Johnson in particular. How is it the left can prance around in a halo of false virtue while being the vilest people on earth. Luckily most of this country can see through these cunts and wish Bozza the best.

Nominated by Smug cunt

Councillor Sheila Oakes
As I type this nom, heinous Sheila Oakes is still the mayor of Heanor in Derbyshire. How much longer she can hold this position must be open to conjecture.
Fat cunt Oakes has been forced to apologise for making an extremely unpleasant comment about Prime Minister Boris Johnson, who, of course, is currently sick as a parrot with Coronavirus and flat on his back in intensive care. Replying to a Facebook post suggesting that prayers could be offered for Bozza, caring, compassionate Oakes stated ‘he completely deserves this, and is one of the worst PMs we’ve ever had’.
Classy. The Amber Valley Labour Party has also issued an apology to the PM and his family, has withdrawn the party whip from Oakes, and indicated that an investigation would be conducted into the gobshite’s conduct.
Now of course Oakes (or anybody else for that matter) is perfectly free to disagree with Bozza; that’s the nature of politics. But for fuck’s sake, the guy’s been struggling with one of the worst crises since the war, has the weight of the nation on his shoulders, and now he’s got cunts like this crawling out from under their stones and making this sort of comment while he’s gravely ill.
If Oakes had any sense of decency she’d resign. Nobody in their right mind would wish Coronavirus on anyone else. Come on Boris; I’m rooting for you to make a complete recovery, because it’ll get right up the noses of cunts like this. It’s to be hoped that Oakes herself doesn’t succumb to this modern day plague, as she’s already struggling to cope with the terrible symptoms of foot-in-mouth disease.

Nominated by Ron Knee

A nomination for Sheila Oakes, mayor of Heanor in Derbyshire who has been forced to apologise for saying Boris Johnson “completely deserves this” after he was admitted to intensive care with coronavirus.
“I didn’t think what I said would upset so many people,” Oakes told BBC News, “It came across as not a nice thing to say. I’m concerned about nurses and doctors who don’t have protective equipment. I said something when I was angry without thinking about the prime minister or his family.”
‘Came across as not a nice thing to say’. No shit Sherlock, perhaps she’s somehow a distant relation of that horrid cow at Warwick university, who I nominated last week for saying something similar. She hasn’t resigned yet though, nor has the horrid cow at Warwick, the one who looks like Jabba the Hut’s grandmother.

Nominated by Mystic Maven