Reading the nomination about “Another nail in the coffin for free speech, and DA’s footnote of cancelling his/her/it/them/etc. DT subscription, puts me in mind of why it is so friggin’ difficult to cancel a contract/subscription online these days!

Phone providers, TV/satellite providers, utility providers, and many many more insist on making life just a little more difficult by trying to dissuade you from leaving them.

A simple letter or email to say “I’m giving you the required 30-day notice so that I can move to a far more organised/cheaper company than you robbing bastards!” will no longer suffice. Instead, you have to ring one of their customer “outreach” support desks and justify yourself for having the temerity to want to leave!

They will try every trick in the book to keep you, even to the point of offering you discounts. They will also try and push you into a “matey” conversation in order to soften you up. Talking about the football, or the weather, or some soft shite – all of it part of the leverage process so that by the end you’re suitably forgiving enough to at least accept another 12 months with them with a very small discount.

I hate all that shit. No wonder I hate the phone so much. My patience goes as far as 2 on a scale of 10 before I’m inclined into calling them a bunch of cunts and slamming the phone down (which of course ultimately achieves nothing as I have to ring the bastards back and start over!)

I can understand the need for security procedures to be put in place, especially involving banks and personal finance. But to move from British Gas to So Energy, or to move from Vodafone to GiffGaff really shouldn’t need so many hoops to jump through, especially when it involves phoning the bastards!

Nominated by Technocunt

It’s bollocks. We lose totally.

The food standards in Australia for raising meat is disgusting and illegal here. They’re going to flood the market with cheap product that’ll fuck over our farmers who can’t match it as they raise their cattle properly. What do we gain from this? nothing and we have a great chance to lose a lot. But it’s “amazing” according to Boris who doesn’t have a fucking clue.

Who wants chlorinated chicken? Or battery farmed pigs?

Only thing worse would be accepting meat from the USA and if that happens I’d almost consider becoming a vegetarian and I hate vegetarians.

Trade Deal Embargo

Nominated by: Lazybiscuits 

Victoria’s Secret – taking the fun out of life.

An example of how to lose your place in the market by kowtowing to the woke.

Have you ever wondered how to rekindle the passion in your relationship? A romantic meal for 2 in a fancy, expensive restaurant perhaps or a weekend away at the hotel where you spent your honeymoon? How about some raunchy underwear to set the pulses racing in the bedroom?

If it’s the latter then never fear, boys and girls, because Victoria’s Secret may soon have the latest solution and become the primary source of inspiration of gifts for the hard to please love of your life.

Yes, in the name of all that is PC they’ve brought on board Megan Rapinoe, the US bean flicking footballer extraordinaire (in her mind at least) who is guaranteed to give brewers droop to even the most desperate of dirty old men; Valentina Sampaio, a Brazilian tr ân nīė*, model and actress (supposedly); and former Miss World 2000, Priyanka Chopra Jonas, who has clearly changed her tune from her Miss World swimsuit days despite it having helped enormously with her current career in Bollywood.

Therefore, expect no more titilating, sexy see through, peephole, crotchless stuff. Expect instead to see a new range with adverts proclaiming something along the lines of:-

“Out soon, a Victoria’s Secret special available online only. It’s just what your non-gender specific acquaintance always wanted for the fossil fuel free December 25th Winterval. Yes it’s a rainbow motifed boilersuit printed with quotes by St George of Floyd and heavily perfumed with the ‘before & after’ scent of a vegan Vindaloo curry. Lined with the finest halal approved “Mekka” brand faux goat hair from Arabia it comes with a detachable and biodegradeable imitation black Rhino horn strap-on designed and personally tested by Sandi Toksvig.
Complete with a 12 months supply of palm oil free lubricant designed to sooth both dry f@nny itch and prolapsed bottoms. Made in Luton, UK by (mostly) TB free, undocumented migrants in eco- powered yurts from ethically sourced and sustainable soya beans”.
Modelled by the fat, shameless twerker Lizzo & O Jones.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-57508848

* The WikiP page for Sampaio currently makes mildly amusing reading as some wit seems to have slipped in an interesting and as yet unnoticed description of him/it as follows:-
“Valentina Sampaio
Born: 10 December 1996 (age 24) Aquiraz, Ceará, Brazil
Nationality: Brazilian
Occupation: Model, actress
Years active: 2016–present
Modeling information: Height 1.77 m (5 ft 9+1⁄2 in)
Hair color: Brown
Eye color: Green
Valentina Sampaio (born 10 December 1996) is a p ê r v ê r t ë d MALE Brazilian model and actor who thinks he is a female. He became Victoria’s Secret’s first openly “t ran sg end er” p ë r v ê r t model in August 2019, and became the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue’s first openly t ran sg end er model in 2020”.

Won’t be long before it gets spotted and changed.

PS. Apologies for the gaps and spelling of certain words in the attempt to bypass the usual WordPress moderation.

Nominated by: Dickie Dribbler

Then added to by: Dickie Dribbler

Bug ger! That didn’t take long. While I was laboriously typing away, the WikiP page for Sampaio was updated at 20:43 (UTC) on 17/06/21 to remove the P ver t references. Some people just have no sense of humour.

These cunts think they have a point, they don’t.

They think laws don’t apply when they do (you can look up Sovereign Citizens and their insane logic). They waste police time for no reason when they can be actually stopping crime.

Worst of all they film it and think they’re right!

Look at this ‘owning’ clip. Oh those terrible cops they just got ‘owned’, no you’re a a cunt and I wished they’d punch you in the face. They didn’t because they’re actually better than you as they have decency and a job.

More Info Here…

And here …

Nominated by: Lazybiscuits

I want to nominate the two cunts who left their two dogs locked up with the windows up ,

when returning to their car they found the police officers smashing the car windows in to get some air in the car, then the cheeky fat cunts complained to the police officers because they broke the windows to get in,

and here is the icing on the cake about the cunts they had the cheek to complain about the food they had earlier on saying it had hairs and was substandard, that was after the greedy cunts had ate most of it, and as these pondlife were leaving the restaurant they were seen taking money from the tip jar, what cunts,

I despair…oven please for the cunts. Couple who locked their dogs in boiling car were seen on café CCTV hours earlier ‘taking money from staff tip jar,

Cunts beyond belief

Two Dogs Rescued from baking hot car

Nominated by: Sidthesexistsforeskin