Does anyone remember being sold this glorified school sports day by that odious little cunt Ken Livingstone with the statement that it would cost the taxpayer no more than a walnut whip? Well, that walnut whip must be roughly the size of the northern fucking hemisphere once the sums were done and it came in at £24Bn.

That figure was arrived at once all of the disruption, the cost of building the Olympic park, the cost of putting up all the hangers on in top hotels, turfing established businesses out of their premises, bribes, bungs and brown envelopes to officials and the loss of £300m from the sale of the athletes village flats. How the fuck do you lose £300m on 2800 flats in London when there is a housing shortage?!

For two weeks we had to put up with a bunch of gurning cunts who use their personalities as birth control for the sum total of 29 gold medals. Anything less than a gold is a defeat in my books. So each medal cost the taxpayer £827,586,206.

The actual cost of an Olympic gold medal is £365. So for that price every man, woman and child in the UK could have been given their own Olympic gold medal and not have to endure an opening ceremony that was as cringe worthy as it was blatantly socialist and also not have their lives disrupted for a bunch of nonentities to run, jump and throw shit for a fortnight.

Put into context, this is the price of 24 top of the range county hospitals, or 4 brand new aircraft carriers (we currently have none), or decent equipment for our armed forces that would prevent them coming home in a box. In fact anything would have been a better use of the money than pissing it away in a style reminiscent of a thousand Dray horses full of lager. Yes, really that much pissing away!!

What galls me most is that this freak show only appeals to the kind of sad cunt that spends their Saturday in the pouring rain watching fucking losers run around in circles while sipping a thermos full of weak lemon squash sheltering under a kagool.

Look at it this way, right now there is some poor cunt in Syria running a fuck of a lot faster than Usain Bolt ever will, trying to escape the clutches of ISIS.

There is some illegal immigrant in France currently jumping higher than any Olympic hopeful trying to get onto the top of a lorry bound for England.

And there are scores of North Africans rowing like fuck across the Mediterranean trying not to drown on the way.

The Olympics can suck my fat one for being a waste of time, waste of money and a total cunt magnet.

Nominated by: Odin’s Balls