People who make meat-free food. I dont mind veggies/vegans that much when they dont claim to be better than me because I eat meat. You want a fruit/veg diet, thats fine. But why are we pandering to them by making meat-free bacon and sausages, and dairy-free cheese? If you want bacon, sausages and cheese then dont be vegan, dont make us produce this horrible fake shit. Oh, it tastes the same. Um, no, it doesnt mate! Now, fast food places are making meat-free burgers and stuff. I go to mcdonalds (not fucking maccy d’s) specifically FOR a burger, not for a veggie meal! Lets stop pandering to these nob-ends and just tell them to go eat a fucking carrot!

Nominated by ElDiablo666

No, not this devil. This devil’s alright.

The Devil  is a cunt, isn’t he.

What a lightweight Beelzebub must be. Apparently, he had his arse kicked by a Nigerian clergynan. Yes, Chukwuemeka Ohanaemere popularly known as Prophet Odumeje claims he won an international spiritual Wrestling match against Satan then displayed his championship belt. Of course.

Previously, this ‘pastor’ has claimed to have resurrected a dead woman by moving around her then…erm… laying on top of her.

Who in their right minds still believes in angels and devils? Does anybody base their life around characters from fairy tales like Voldemort or the Grim Reaper?

Nigerians, it sems. Not at all loud, ill-mannered, scamming conmen. Some of them are devil-dodgers.

“Commot man, if na MO-ney I wan tek, I for go aks you for de charatee doNAYtions. Anyways, YEE can buy ma VI-dee-O on-line and if you don laike, I REE-fund yous straight, cha. All you need do is provide your name, address, date of birth, bank details and mother’s maiden name.”

?

https://www.faceofmalawi.com/2021/12/30/nigerian-prophet-odumeje-says-he-won-international-spiritual-wrestling-match-against-satan-displays-his-championship-belt/?amp

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

Is there any group of people on Earth worse than hippies? From the sanctimonious bellends of Extinction Rebellion to money-grubbing bastards like Jobs and Branson, the sort of people who would go through a dog turd to find a 5p piece, hippies make the world just that little bit more unpleasant for everyone…

ABC News Link

Mitchell hasn’t been relevant since Nixon was in the White House. Young? Fuck knows. When was the last time he had a hit? 1980? I got him confused with Neil Diamond when discussing this with the Empress but fuck him anyway. Spotify have basically told him to fuck off.

This is in no way in support of Joe Rogan, of whom, like Chamberlain, I know nothing. All I would say is that anyone who has that wankstain Petersen on his show must be a bit of a cunt.

Two great philosophers on hippies…

“Never trust a hippie” – John Lydon.

“I know hippies. I’ve hated them my whole life.” Eric Cartman.

YouTube Link

Nominated by: Emperor of East Anglia

Cunt Ghost Hunters United States.

Sick of these fuckin money grabbers, influencing their fucked up, believe everything they are told, everything is a fucking conspiracy, 70% of us believe in ghosts, countrymen/women.

I fuckin hate the dead being used by these total fuckwits. My dear departed relatives and friends are not “stuck” between life and death, condemned to walk the earth as a “white” or “grey” shadow figure. My dear departed were not buried in a pet semetary, on ancient Indian burial grounds, axe murdered, abused etc. Let the fucking dead rest in peace you fuckin blood sucking cunts!!!

Nominated by Cuntybaws

Yes, you did hear me right – toilet twinning. Here’s the idea : you pay £60 to have your shit hole twinned with a shit hole in an African shit hole of your choice. When I got over the disbelief, I pissed myself laughing (see what I did there!?!)

If you don’t believe me then this is a link to their shite – sorry, site ; Toilet Twinning Link

Some of the stuff on here, you just couldn’t make up. For example “Flushing away poverty one toilet at a time” or “The sanitation crisis – kicking up a stink”. Or “Bogtech – one loo doesn’t fit all” FFS who writes this shit?

Seems you can also have the opportunity to become a “loominary”. Whowza!

Apparently, they send you a certificate to hang in your loo which contains a picture of the toilet your toilet is twinned with. I’m sure the photoshop wizards in Admin will have a field day mocking one of those up.

Maybe I should sign up for this crap. After all, I’ve been talking shit for years…

Nominated by: Dioclese