Eurovision should be cunted… I should have a put a bet on the one legged bearded lesbian to win it though… Bucks Fizz were cunts, but Jay Aston looked as naughty as fuck… Bardot, from a year later in 1982, were even bigger cunts… And that hippy chick from 1983… A German singing ‘A Little Peace?’ Was she taking the piss?

Three thoughts on Eurovision:
1. That pile of crap almost makes me long for World War III…
2. A shame Russia didn’t win… Imagine Putin’s face when all those gays turned up…
3. If Nigella had got her tits out, the UK would have walked it…

And David De Gea’s bird is in this year’s Eurovision… No wonder he might fuck back off to Espana if he’s giving that one…

Nominated by: Norman

If they’d used my Eurovision song, they’d have pissed it!

Nominated by: Chas C

The usual crap offering from the UK, followed by the sycophantic voting for your neighbours, followed by the ritual humiliation of GB (because nobody in Europe likes us).

All presented by that sausage bandit Graham Norton..

Nominated by: Lez

I’d like to cunt banks, which I accept isn’t entirely novel but in this instance its against the backdrop of all the cunting that goes on with respect pay day loan companies.

You see when you do the maths,the interest you pay on a payday loan over a 4 week term is actually much less than the ‘fee’ the fucking bank would hit you with if you went overdrawn by the same amount over the same period. So in fact, Banks are much fucking worse than pay day loan companies and yet people say Jack shit about their extortionate rates.

Funking cunts.

Nominated by: The Great North Cunt

Knobheads who wish dead people a happy birthday are cunts.

I am aware that George Best would have been 69 years old yesterday, but as much as I loved him as a footballer, what is the fucking point of these Twitter Twats ‘celebrating’ a birthday which he isn’t here for? I bet some bellend will make a special cake and post pictures of it on Twatter/Fuckbook/CuntTube.

He was a great player (probably the greatest), the booze killed him a decade ago, and proper Manc Reds were choked at the time and that’s that… All this other stuff is bollocks.

Nominated by: Norman

Black Sabbath are cunts… Well at least two of them are…

Don’t get me wrong. The self titled debut, Paranoid and Black Sabbath Volume 4 are great.

But it has come to Ozzy and Bill Ward bitching and slanging in a way that resembles a Guardian comments column… Maybe Bill has some sort of case? Maybe Ozzy is having his strings pulled by the revolting Sharon Osbourne? It’s just sad to see a band of their stature and men of their age doing something similar to what happened when Robbie Williams got sacked (the first time!) from Take That…

Nominated by: Norman

Zero tolerance staff are cunts…

It’s apparently alright for some medical centre receptionist, council phone answerer or job centre lackey to talk down to someone and treat them like a five year old schoolkid and/or a piece of shit… Yet if someone (anyone) gets annoyed at this diabolical attitude the Little Hiter points at the poster that says ‘We do not tolerate any abuse or anti-social behaviour’ Even if the person isn’t giving them any and is just standing up for themself…

This zero tolerance shit basically protects them and not the client/patient/customer, and it gives these soft arsed cunts carte blanche to do and say whatever they bloody like…

Nominated by: Norman