Same goes for that baldy cunt wiggling his fat arse for Money Supermarket, or that bearded twat dressed as Carmen Miranda on that bingo advert…

Don’t cunts like that have any self respect?

Nominated by: Norman

“You buy one, you get one free. I said you buy one you get one free!”

Yeah, I heard you – now fuck the fuck off! You seriously expect me to buy windows from a cunt like you ?!?

Nominated by : Dioclese

These minimum wage monkeys in high visibility jackets are pig ignorant, power mad wankers… Little Hitler syndrome isn’t in it…. At Old Trafford these cunts are the scum of the earth…. Throwing people out for singing, standing up or bringing in flags (unless you’re the untouchable Glazer stooge cunt, Tufty, with your crappy and tasteless ‘official’ banners: like that dreadful ‘Chosen One’ monstrosity for Moyes)…. These cunts even stopped an elderly away fan bringing in his crutches…

But these bastards are everywhere these days…. Acting like the Gestapo on crack if a player celebrates a goal with the fans… Wading in as if Jack Kennedy has been shot for a second time… These thugs also throw a fit if someone dances a little jig at a concert… I know Elton John can be a cunt, but he was right to bollock one of these steward Nazis when they got tough with a fan dancing at one of his gigs…. These power mad twats using the health and safety crap to get up to all sorts of nastiness need a good kicking… I never thought I’d say this, but I would rather go back to when the cozzers did matchday security….

Nominated by: Norman

Nothing good has came out of Twatter or Fumbler.

Now excuse me gents as I have day filled with Hashish, Fart Porn, Video Games and Music. You raping bastards will never understand how difficult my life is.

Nominated by: Titslapper

You know the types, “like O M G” or “L O L” or even worse use a website name “You’re confused.com”

They should all be rounded up, forced to work for nothing, fed on Iceland Turkey Twizzlers and treated to endless repeats of TOWIE until they die live on TV – we could call it “I’m a fucking retard, get me out of here and bury me now”

Presented by Ant & Dec of course!

Nominated by: Jimmy Savile’s corpse

Fuckers chomped their way through two of my courgette plants last night.

Don’t even get me started on ants.

Nominated by: Fleaboy

Slugs and snails, and puppy dogs tails
That’s what little boys are made of !
“Sugar and spice and all things nice
That’s what little girls are made of!”

Corbyn and Harman come to mind. One right out of two ain’t bad…

Nominated by: Dioclese