I’m sure this has been properly cunted before, but I’d just like to add my nickel’s worth (sic).

Why in the name of suffering Jesus on the cross being poked with a spear, does anyone in this country, thousands of miles away, have to be told every detail, every nuance and every tedious utterance of this contest for the governance of the world’s largest banana republic? And then endure hours of drivelling slot-filling commentary from the professional commentariat? Why does all news everywhere else have to yield to the fake urgency of this essentially tribal mass shouting match? Isn’t our own bad enough?

Why must there be incessant clips from both the demented egotists in the race, demonstrating their mutual incompatibility even with with the cliche of a pissup in a brewery? These cunts aren’t going to run the country, ffs. The bankers will be doing that, as usual. So you don’t actually need a president with an IQ greater than an amoeba, or one with any knowledge at all of economic or international relations. (Hence Trump, incidentally). JP Morgan and Goldman Sachs will continue bribing, lying, asset stripping, selling worthless derivatives and subverting due process in order to achieve their own preferred outcomes – but so handy to have a Technicolor ™ clown performing in front of the cameras to distract the voter from the uselessness of voting at all.

And our media not only buy that, but pay top dollar for it. A hack in every swing state gibbering to camera on every bulletin, although the result won’t be known for weeks, if at all. It would probably be cheaper to go out and look for real stories – but it would be so much more arduous.

By the time this goes up, it should be known which cunt’s picture will be inescapable for the next four years*, but there will be no relief, because the Yanks love elections so much there will be another bunch in two years.

*Assuming the orange cunt doesn’t declare himself President for Life, of course, Dear Leader and Father of the Ruling Dynasty. A strong possibility.

Nominated by: Komodo 

…and in a roundabout kind of way, here’s one from Norman

Emily Maitils and the BBC are cunts.

That Jimmy Hill in drag cunt, Emily Maitlis was absolutely disgraceful during the US Presidential Election coverage. Blatant and shameless hate and disrespect towards Big Don and an obvious bias and favouritism towards Uncle Joe’s Mintballs and Che Kamala. It certainly wasn’t balanced or impartial news coverage like it’s supposed to be.

And anyone who says Maitlis is ‘sexy’ is a complete cunt. She looks like she has got one of Worzel Gummidge’s spare heads on.

About thirty years ago, Connery made a comment during an interview that he thought it was ok to slap a woman under certain circumstances. From the moment he said it, to the day he died on the 31st October few, if any, people spoke out against it. I think their was outcry at the time, but not a fucking word since. But now that he’s pegged out, they’re all coming out of the woodwork, to denounce him as an evil, white, toxic male.

The latest is Daily Fail columnist Jenni Murray, who says she can’t grieve his passing because of the comments he made several decades ago. Fuck me. If you’re the kind of person who can’t get over a silly comment made so long ago, then it’s YOU who has the problem, not Sean Connery. It’s pathetic. The time to speak was when he was alive, but the man is dead, show some fucking respect.

I have to admit, I wasn’t a fan of his. In fact, he always struck me as a bit of a miserable git. But I watched his movies because, for the most part, they were great, and he was a brilliant actor. I don’t agree with the comment he made, but he was entitled to his opinion. And there was more to him than ONE stupid opinion.

But no, this is current era, where a man can literally be accused of rape, just for farting in front of a woman. They didn’t even have the decency to wait until after the funeral, it literally took a couple of hours before the shit slinging started. They couldn’t even wait until he’d gone cold. It’s cowardly and immature. People like this, are cunts.

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw

Step up to the plate again, Frances O’Grady; first woman General Secretary of the TUC.

She is always haranguing the government about lack of support for this or that group despite the billions already spent. In O’Gradyland money does indeed grow on trees.

Yet the most annoying thing about her is her patronising attitude and her grating voice. She always sounds like her mouth is touching the microphone, with bacon and eggs sizzling in the background.

Her words are delivered with a heavy lissssp and the spit must fly everywhere in her vicinity.

Shut up you irritating super spreading mare.

Nominated by: Lord Helpuss

Gary Lineker is a cunt.

Lineker says ‘Rashid’, a refugee he hosted in his home, “didn’t overly like” football.
First of all, ‘Rashid’… A peaceful adult male ‘refugee’. What a fucking surprise, eh? Is there any other kind?

Second of all, the ex goalhanging human oilslick merely ‘hosted’ the peaceful chappie in his mansion. Which means ‘Rashid’ was there for five minutes, if that.

For all his gobbing off and lecturing us ‘riff raff’, Gary will not have any of the ‘refugees’ he adores so much in his house permanently. I might have bloody well known. What a fucking cunt he really is.

Nominated by: Norman

(More here – DA https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/uknews/13055240/gary-lineker-letter-refugee-mansion/ )

Dear Fellow Cunters, I invite you to compare and contrast the following:

Sometimes I wonder how I spend
The lonely night
Dreaming of a song
The melody haunts my reverie

And I am once again with you
When our love was new
And each kiss an inspiration
But that was long ago
And now my consolation
Is in the stardust…

(“Stardust” Carmichael & Parish)

and

Xanny bars, suicide door, brand new bag
College girls give a nigga head in my Rafs
Rockstar life, so much money it’ll make you laugh, hey
These bitches they hate and you can’t miss what you never had
Hey, hey

Off the juice (juice), codeine got me trippin’ (juice)
Copped the coupe (coupe), woke up, roof is missing (yeah)
Ice (ice), lemonade, my neck was drippin’
Ice (ice), lemonade, my neck was drippin’

(“Lemonade” by Internet Money, collective)

We may wonder why the world is being fucked over by every kind of cunt imaginable, In my opinion the “Music Business” can take a large share of the blame. An industry that once promoted some of the most wonderful and accessible poetry about the human condition and music that lifted the spirits of generations, has transformed into a gravy train for cunts that have dedicated themselves to eulogising sexual assault, drug taking and general criminality.

The yoof are too busy aping these morons to realise they are the being royally fucked over by monsters for whom the Internet Money collective and their fellow artistes are simply useful idiots. To the “Music Business” – go fuck yourselves you turd peddling cunts.

Nominated by: Twenty Thousand Cunts Under the Sea