This twat was arrested just a few days ago for public order offences, racial abuse and threatening to slit the throat of a hostel worker – just another typical day, I suppose!

Turns out he has well over 200 other crimes under his belt, a quarter of which were for public order offences.

A probation officer came up with a very obvious No shit, Sherlock, conclusion – “There was an established pattern of offending which included serious threats of violence. There was a concern Bell’s behaviour could escalate.”

With all this in mind, what was the outcome of his latest offence? Well here it is, and I quote:-

“Magistrates imposed a six-week prison sentence but suspended it for 12 months after hearing that a short immediate jail term was not deemed beneficial by the probation service. Bell must also pay £50 compensation to hostel workers involved in the incident.”

The magistrates are cunts for such a pathetic 6 week stay in prison. But this was overturned by the Probation Service, who felt it would “not be beneficial”. Instead he gets a 12 months suspended and to cough up 50 quid for being a bit naughty! (The £50 will be courtesy of the Taxpayer as he is claiming benefits.)

It’s amazing enough that this cunt is still out on the streets despite making a career out of crime. But now we have another farcical “sentencing” even though some poor hostel worker suffered racial abuse and the deadly threat of having his throat cut!

Bellend walks out of court laughing, while the hostel security guard has to cope with PTSD for the rest of his life. And I bet he won’t see that 50 quid either, or at least not in one big chunk!

Magistrates and the Probation Service really are deluded cunts, but this case not only takes the biscuit, but the whole fucking tin!

Cumbria Crack

Nominated by: Technocunt

Remember the good old days when you showed up for work, put in a shift and then fucked off home? Well thanks to a toxic mix of a labour shortage and the selfish entitlement of Gen Z now entering the workforce exploiting the post-Covid ‘new normal’, those days are now over.

Companies desperate to hire and retain staff are giving in to ridiculous demands from woke Gen Z employees such as time off for birthdays, yoga sessions and pet bereavement leave.

Daily Mail News Link

This won’t make a business more productive. Once you cave in to these demands and go down down the rabbit hole of appeasing these spoilt infantilised brats, like anything woke, it is never enough and more demands will be made. They will be paying them to get out of bed and a private taxi in next before they even set foot inside the office.

They seem to think every company should be like a Silicon Valley tech start up, lounging around on beans bags brainstorming and eating their hippie salads for a £100,000 a year.

The carrot and stick approach can be incentivising and produce results but fuck the carrot, these workshy bastards just need a good fucking clubbing.

Nominated by: Liberal Liquidator

Here I am sat enjoying my Sunday afternoon and I thought I’d have a quick look at my online banking. Some utter cunt has had it away with £1686.42.

What’s odd about this is the first transaction was for SAGA £76.84 the rest was made up of 45 transactions to Hobbycraft. The cunt had sat there for about 9 hours skanking money in £5, £10, £20 £35 and £40 amounts.

I have to say my bank, Barclays, were absolutely brilliant in dealing with it, within 24 hours or so every penny was refunded.

The chances of catching the cunt that did this is virtually nil, the bank is unlikely to investigate further. To be honest I thought the SAGA payment would be easy to trace, the cunts only flog insurance and holidays I reckon.

Todays lesson is not to have too much sat in your current account, which I’ve already addressed. Scum bags, I’d publicly flog them before rubbing lemon juice in the flayed flesh, all this is prior to letting a pack of hound on the cunts.

I know banks get a cunting from time to time, but on this occasion I have nothing but praise for the way I was treated.

Nominated by: Bertram Cuntatious DCO

And seconded by: Norman

Superb cunting, Bertram, and seconded by me.

I was once screwed by one of these cunts a few years ago in 2012, and I have refused to do online banking ever since. Even now, I still do it the ‘old way’. People always tell me ‘But… But… It’s the way it’s done now and you need an online account’.

No, I fucking don’t. Yeah, it’s convenient, but it can slso be a pain in the arse. When my brother in law made more than one payment from his online account, his cunt of a bank actually stopped his account, thinking he was a fraud. Yet, it was his account and his fucking money.

Now, in certain quarters, this lot are being ‘reassessed’, with people who didn’t used to to like them giving it the rose tinted stuff and all that ‘They weren’t that bad compared to the crap that’s around today.’ sentimentality. Oh, and that one: ‘At least they were a proper band’.

Well, popular music is so bad now, even Dido or James Blunt sounds good next to the likes of Ed Sheercunt and Titless Swift. But giving Oasis due for being the most unoriginal band in musical history? That’s just taking the piss.

Aside from their notorious bullshitting, staged fights and self mythologizing bollocks, these cunts nicked from other artists time and time again.

Now, I can hear someone say ‘Yeah, we know. T-Rex and the New Seekers’. But there are more of them, fucking loads in actual fact. Everyone from Thin Lizzy to Cliff Richard (straight up) has been pilfered by that unibrowed bluenose knobhead Noel.

And as for them being a ‘real’ band? A band that had four drummers, four bassists, and two rhythm guitarists? As soon as the orignal line-up broke up, it was the Gallaghers and loads of sidemen. It was hardly a magic mix like Daltrey, Townshend, Moon and Entwistle.

If people want to get nostalgic about 90s bands and all that Britpop bollocks, then can find better than them to eulogise. Simple fact is they weren’t very good then and they aren’t very good now.

Here is a complete list of all the songs they nicked. Has to be seen to be believed.

You Tube Link

Nominated by: Norman

Have been spending the last few days working at a customer-site sorting out some of their IT infrastructure, most of which needs some serious upgrading.

Anyway, during my time there I could not help but notice that a lot of the staff were pissing about on their phones and tablets rather than focusing on what they’re paid to be doing (it’s a credit ratings agency of about 70 employees).

Because their datacentre has glass panelling, I can see right into their main office of about 30 people and most of them were fucking about on their phones, standing around by colleague’s desks taking selfies and constantly staring at their phones.

There is no adjoining offices for the bosses, but if they saw what I was seeing they would be giving their entire team a right royal bollocking (unless they themselves were tap, tap, tapping away on their own devices)

This isn’t the first time I’ve been to customer sites and seen similar activity. It wouldn’t be quite so bad if it was during a tea/lunch break, but quite a few people are quite brazen about it.

Such low productivity seems to be de rigueur these days and is it any wonder a lot of cunts still want to work from home!

Therefore, when you’re trying to contact customer services by phone, this is what they’re probably doing while your 76th in the fucking queue.

Nominated by: Technocunt

And speaking of cunts on phones, here’s another from Captain Magnanimous

People who talk into their mobiles on loud speaker are cunts, aren’t they.

Furthermore, if you hold the phone at an angle to speak into the bottom to seem like you’re important, you achieve bonus cunt points.

If you do this, you probably have a man-bun. You might even have a circle beard. You definitely vape. You could also be one of those crass mothers in a dressing-gown dropping the brat off at school. Alternatively, you might be a mortgage broker attempting to seem important. You definitely wear Crocs.

They probably brush their teeth before eating breakfast.

These people are crass idiots. Why do I not only have to hear your mundane, inarticulate opinion, but also your equally banal, fuckwit mate’s response? If only the airbag would open whilst you did this driving and scatter your wretched teeth around the car.

You look like a cunt shouting into a piece of toast.