Radio Adverts.

I was listening to Smooth Radio today and noticed that the ads. all seemed to fall into one of two categories…

1st)…..Charities…..appeal after appeal for “Five Pounds a Month” for rheumatism,RSPCA, MS Trust,Cancer Research,The Endangered Snow Leopard and,of,course Um’Bongos….now I’m not saying that some of these charities aren’t doing a worthy job…I’m sure that they are but surely they must realise that most people will be too concerned about their own personal finances to want to start giving money to any charity, let alone donate to dig yet another well so that Rastus N’Bomobo doesn’t have to get off his lazy arse and go and seek water…. Charities should realise that we are all “charitied-out” (not that I was ever “charitied-in,tbh.)…too many well-paid directors and political agendas (RSPCA..I’m looking at you,you venal Cunts) for my liking involved in most charities.

2nd…..Fucking Govt. ads….Following on from the “Run,Hide,Tell” advice rearding terrorists,we now have more ” Nanny’ll tell you what to do,you’re too weak and pathetic to think for yourself” advice to “Stay Safe…only go out if you must…wash your hands…wear a mask etc.” They’d do the Country a damn sight more service by saying “Unless you are vulnerable…put down the wineglass,get off facebook,switch off netflick and GET THE FUCK BACK TO WORK….the paid holiday is over,the Country is bankrupt. …Emerge from your cellars,blinking in the sunlight…grow a set of bollocks and accept that you can’t live the rest of your lives wrapped in cotton wool supported by the State.”

Fuck Off.

Nominated by Dick de Pfeffel Foxchaser-Fiddler

Ingeus are cunts…

An old mate of mine has age and ill health catching up with him… Basically he used to work his bollocks off, but now his kidneys are fucked… Paid in all his life and all that and he is now looking for a job with less hours and to work around his routine (he’s now on all kinds of pills and stuff)… He doesn’t want to give up work and do fuck all, but he wants to wind down a bit and take his declining condition into account… Those lovely people at JCP (cunts) told him to go to these people: claiming they can help him with his health issues and ‘work’ with him…. Only one problem with that though… It’s total fucking bollocks…. Here is the lowdown (from him to me) on these buffoons…

1. Did not know what CKD (Chronic Kidney Disease) was. His ‘Key Worker’ (whatever that is) simply asked ‘What’s that?’

2. Showed little to no concern when told about CKD and what is was.

3. Did not even look at any of the Hospital or Consultant paperwork, official symptoms list (done by GP) or Doctor’s dictation he brought with him as evidence of health condition.

4. Did not ask about any symptoms or medication, or how it effects day to day life.

5. Because CKD is an unseen physical condition – as opposed to a visible disability or a problem like drug addiction, alcoholism or anxiety – he did not feel it was taken seriously. In fact, he knows he bloody wasn’t.

6. Although the scheme is titled the Work and Health Programme, he felt that little to no emphasis was put on actual health issues (which he does genuinely have) and was told that medical records, Hospital paperwork, medication details and test results were not needed. The ‘Heallth’ part of the scheme’s title seems to have little to no relevance.

7. It appears blatantly to be more about fulfilling targets and getting people into work – any work – regardless of health issues or individual cases. My mate was made to feel more like a ‘rank and file’ nobody and malingerer, instead of a person seeking employment as best and as suitably as possinle in his situation (which he does and has done).

8. Saw another ‘health professional’ there (separate to the clunk he had already seen) and they also didn’t know what CKD was and ignored any official medical notes, tests or paperwork. All but ignored his list of symptoms and did a stupid ‘ice breaker’ session where the silly cow wrote ‘key words’ on a board… For fuck’s sake, eh?…. Absolutely useless….

9. Every time he goes in there he is greeted with a ‘friendly face’ i.e: false bonhomie, and the minute he sits down he is never asked how his medical situation is. He’s then immediately shoehorned into either taking a job he either can’t do or doesn’t want. When he mentioned his health, all he got was ‘Well, if you can walk here, you can work’. He attempted in vain to explain that CKD is much more complicated than that and all he got was ‘Well, you should apply for ESA then’. Naturally these sods offered him no help and advice at all with this statement and my pal knows only too well that claiming for ESA is harder than pulling teeth… Only smackheads, pisspots, ex-cons, transbenders and foreigners get the fucking thing… The English working man or woman is at the bottom of the list….
Now, this pal of mine is a good old boy, a nice lad and has been a grafter all his life… But when he needs help like he does now, he’s not getting it… It’s simply filling quotas, setting targets and he could die for all this lot care, as long as they have ‘done their job’ and crossed him off their list… Ladies and Gentlemen, this is Great Britain and how it now treats its people… A combination of the workhouse and the scrapyard.

He was also told by these fuckers to lie to potential employees and businesses. My mate was told to keep his medical issues from firms to ‘get his foot in the door’. Which basically means be dishonest and if he dies on their premises then it’s tough shit on them (the company) and him. Obvious they want hin to lie so he will get work -any work- and they can cross another off their quota list. Morally bankrupt corrupt pigs.

And now with this virus thing going on, my mate is officially in the high risk category. But these Ingeus fuckers are still mithering him about ASDA needing extra staff to help with the demand because of Covid-19 and asking him about ‘online courses’ when he has told them time and again that he is not interested. He did tell the daft bitch that the Doctor told him in writing not to leave the house and that he had to self isolate… What part of that didn’t they fucking get?! Cunts!

Nominated by Norman

House husbands

‘Men’ who stay at home and look after the kids so the wife can have a career are cunts. They are a disgrace to the male of the species. I will add the caveat that it’s acceptable if the bloke has been injured in a war (or something) and can’t work.

But I keep seeing TV shows where it seems a normal thing for a bloke to be the woman in the relationship while the woman goes to work. Even happened recently in a series called ‘Liar’ where a dark key male played the role of a faithful housewife. Never seen such a thing. Doesn’t happen.

We do have plenty of honkies who do it though. Have an old mate who does just that. Pathetic to see him on Cuntbook wearing an apron and ”getting the kids’ lunchboxes ready”. What the fuck is all that about? I sometimes wonder if their wives strap on a huge dildo and roger their ‘men’ half to death of an evening. He didn’t take too kindly to me saying that he’s making himself look a tit by being the woman in the relationship and posting such shit. And that it’s a man’s job to provide for his woman. Truth hurts. Fuck it.

It’s a fucking disgrace, as others are wont  to say.

Nominated by Cuntybollocks

Praying is a cunt, isn’t it.

If a family rocks up to the hospital to see Grandad and tells the nurse that they’ve all been praying for him, does that mean the nurse can give the ventilator to somebody else? He won’t need it, will he. Somebody without divine help could benefit from it.

Praying is a thought placebo performed by empty-eyed gullibles. Talking to yourself is acceptable, just don’t assume anybody is listening.

The only way putting your hands together during the Chinky Virus has helped, is if you use some soap and water.

Prayer: The Best Way To Achieve Absolutely Fuck All.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

Just to prove I’m an equal opportunities cunter, let’s do a cunting for mine and your favourite bloke in a frock. Raise your glasses and give a big hand for Little Justin Welby aka the Archbishop of Canterbury.

It appears that Justine has taken time out from counting the money generated by his church’s vast estates to slag off all us white supremacists.

God’s justice and love for all creation demands that the evil of racism is properly confronted and tackled.

Joint statement by Archbishop @JohnSentamu and me: https://t.co/2HbvVrP1to pic.twitter.com/lib1FVEDsi

— Archbishop of Canterbury (@JustinWelby) June 2, 2020

I can only apologise for being white.

Is your heart going to weep for the Christians currently being persecuted in countries where they are in the minority? I’m not going to hold my breath on that one.

I have recently come into contact with 2 of your vicars and they are top notch blokes and I think you are destroying all the good work they are doing.

And here endeth the lesson.

Nominated by SimmyJavill

Amen.