If you’re a new soldier based in South Korea, it’s probably not a good idea to punch a local in a nightclub and then have a go at the rozzers when they turn up.

It bought him a ticket home and a ‘fuck off out of the army’ card, it seems.

Did this chippy fellow take it on the chin like a man? Learn from it?

No, he secretly arranged a trip to the DMZ on the North Korean border with a tour group. Something that takes weeks.

He then slipped the guards at the airport taking him back to the USA and went to the DMZ.

And legged it into (yes, into) North Korea. He was lucky he wasn’t shot.

Leave him there I say. What a plonker.

But I’m sure we’ll get the ‘mental elf’ shite and the septics will spend millions trying to ‘bring him home’.

Let the stupid cunt stay out there. He’s earned it.

BBC News Link.

Nominated by : Cuntybollocks

I’d like to cunt the government for what is clearly fuckwittery and cuntery of the highest order.

The cunts that rule us seem to have worked out how to kill two birds with one lazy, thoughtless, poorly aimed stone.

Daily Fail Link.

If these trades are in short supply it means the day rate of those trades should be higher than if they were abundant. When youngsters leaving school see theres money to be made in the trades they may go to college and gain a vocational qualification and enter that trade to earn some good honest dosh and boost the nations economy whilst doing so.

If the government think relaxing immigration rules to let foreign trades come in what they flying fuck do they think will happen to the day rates of those trades when the market is flooded with an influx of workers that will work for less? Our youth wont be much motivated by the thought of busting their guts for 80 quid a day will they?

The Gov is about to fuck another industry if they’re not careful. You’d have thought that lessons may have been learnt when they pissed our ship building industry up the wall. Evidently not. Cunts.

Nominated by : Cunter S Thompson

We know it happens, but here is an especially egregious example. In November 2021 an elderly (white) woman was injured by a (fierce looking) black woman. She died in hospital just before Xmas 2021, Today – July 17th 2023, the London “Standard” has published this:

The Standard Link.

Too little, too late – a lot of these dusky ladies wear wigs, different ones on different days, and would any member of the sisterhood grass after 18 months. Because casual violence is common on the streets of Sadiq Kunt’s London who would remember an incident over 18 months ago. Did it really take the Metropolitan Police all this time to find the photo of the culprit?

Nominated by : W. C. Boggs

Lucy Spraggan and the use of her rape as a marketing tool.

BBC News Link.

This Lucy Spraggan (no, me neither) Apparently she was a contestant on X-Factor some 11 years ago. During the course of her short lived time on the show, she was apparently raped by an hotel porter. Accused went to court, was found guilty and justice won the day and quite right too. You may not have heard of all this, because at the time the young lady simply wanted justice to be done and get on with her life.

It would appear her life hasn’t financially gone quite to plan, so has now published her ‘memoir’ (who the fuck is going to read it outside her family and friends?) Here then lies the issue…how do you get some exposure to sell your book if people have forgotten who you are- even if they actually knew who you were to begin with that is?

Simple, you NOW bring to the media your rape story and hey presto according to the media this is now headline grabbing news, which they give you your platform to shift sales.

Rape is awful, but using rape to promote sales of something most wouldn’t wipe their arse on is deplorable.

Read the article

She is a cunt.

Nominated by : Chuff Chugger

It’s idiosyncratic I know, but there’s just something about commemorations that get right on my tits.

There are just so many of the fuckers. Okay, I realise that a lot are very well-meaning; they aim to draw attention to, and promote action on, a whole range of important topics, from numeracy and literacy, to fighting diseases such as cancer and strokes, to world overpopulation, to remembering our armed services. It’s a saturated market though, and I for one just blank out from it all. Take the issue of sanitation in the third world, for example. When were you last galvanised into action as a result of World Toilet Day?

What really gets my goat however is the sheer irritating pointlessness of some of these celebrations. I give you Teddy Bears’ Picnic Day, World Emoji Day, Tattoo Day, Talk Like A Pirate Day, Star Trek Day, Take Your Houseplant For A Walk Day… Anybody planning to ‘come out’ on Coming Out Day? Anybody know anybody who’s ‘come out’ on Coming Out Day? And don’t any cunt mention World Bicycle Day, or I may spontaneously combust.

Then you’ve got commemorative weeks. It feels as though we really need the likes of National Chip Week, National Homoeopathy Week and Curry Week in our lives.

Then (oh Lord) we’ve got the months. Whole fucking months to ‘celebrate’ Veggies, Vegans, Mustaches, Black History, and Pride. Yeah, get your LGBTQXYZ rainbow flags out everybody, and insist that MAPs get added to the alphabet community, they’re so marginalised and misunderstood.

Believe it or not, we actually just celebrated National Bikini Day. That’s right, a day to celebrate bikinis. Don’t believe me? Well, take a look;

Daily Fail Link.

Er, hang on a mo, I could definitely spring into action for this event. Lordy, but International Masturbation Day on the 28th May suddenly seems like a hell of a long way off…

Nominated by : Ron Knee