Julia Hartley Brewer

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How this right wing twat ever manages to string together a coherent sentence let alone a shit radio prgramme every afternoon is beyond the comprehension of even the smallest ameoba.

Yep, she may have ‘mumsie’ appeal to fucking Tory central office but it doesn’t wash with me. Talking over silly cunts who phone in to her rancid show, having a fucking hugely annoying sense of self importance and a general “I’m better than you because I do everything right and anyone who dissagrees with me is wrong” type attitude get right up my japseye.

She’s just some fucking slack jawed hypocritical cunt who used to write for the Grauniad, and even then she was fucking shit.

What a cunt!

Nominated by: Hurling Dervish

David Attenborough

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David Attenborough is always scurrying around in bushes, spying on animals copulating. I mean it’s just not right, is it? Fucking bad enough we have to listen to twat rambling on about the life cycle of the lesser crested newt, but at least you know what your going to get if you want to watch one of his programmes, which are brilliant in spite of the pompous dick and not because of him.

I suppose all that zoological stuff is right enough, if you like that sort of thing. What pisses me off is the fact that, because he has become a multi millionaire by milking the Beeb for nigh on fifty years he thinks I give a fuck what he thinks about politics and world affairs. ‘Cause I don’t. Not one, little, fucking bit.

Nominated by: Termujin

Geoff Hurst

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Geoff fucking bastard cunting Hurst is a cunt. Apparently he scored a couple of goals in a footie match 50 years ago and hasn’t stopped talking about it since. Cunt. Fucking knighthood for services to being a total spazzy cunt.

And whilst I’m on the subject, any slum-dwelling Cockney cunt who says West Ham won the World Cup is a cunt.

Nominated by: Cunt’s Mate Cunt

Irritating people

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People that go to ‘Uni’; people with a degree in politics, economics or both; Civil Servants that are not civil and don’t serve; militant gays; tories; lefties; Nelson Mandela, Robert Mugabe and various other nig-nogs and pakis that are busily fucking up the brilliant legacies left to them by the British Empire; people who say they ‘would gladly pay more tax’ but don’t; that stupid bitch at the bank who asks you ‘Is there anything else I can help you with?’ when she hasn’t helped you with anything in the first place; people who are more concerned about fucking whales and polar bears than people; people who walk slowly, directly in front of you, at the shopping centre; women in their late 50’s with short, grey, motorcycle-helmet-hair-styles, with side partings and dandruff, who don’t bother with make up and squeeze their ridiculously fat arses into Tesco own brand jeans two sizes too small whilst displaying a patronising, know it all attitutude, then wonder why their husband doesn’t want to shag them any more; people who think I’m interested in how far/fast they jogged this morning; people that are ‘working from home’; people who are ‘on a gap year’; people who say ‘old school’ and ‘awesome’, people who have a fucking ridiculous tattoo in the hope someone will ask them what it’s about and then bore the tits off us with their shit story about a dead dog/parent/child, like we should give a fuck.

Cunts. The lot of them.

Nominated by: Termujin

Barry Manilow

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Barry Manilow – his only saving grace is at least he seems to be in semi retirement now, just popping up on TV occasionally to induce mass nausea. Fuck off Bazza you Copa Cobana wanker.

Those cunts at Heathrow shouldn’t worry about drugs or guns coming into the country, we need protecting from evil like this. Next time he tries to enter the country send him directly to camp Guantanamo for waterboarding and confiscate his syrup.

Said syrup should then be sent to Bruce Forsythe as that cunt has had the same one for decades.

Nominated by: London Cunt