‘It takes all sorts to make a world’, the old saying goes, and generally I can relate to that. It’s just that sometimes, someone whose outlook is a bit, well, odd, intrudes on my consciousness and I start to wonder.

Let me introduce Riley (aka Justin) Dennis, a self-styled male to female transgender activist and feminist, who ‘identifies’ as a ‘non-binary woman’ and lesbian. Fair enough, it’s okay with me if that’s his/her/hem’s (whatever) choice. However it seems that s/he’s not content just to get on with things. S/he wants to dictate the terms upon which everyone else must relate to him/her/hem (oh ffs!). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2X-PgHSZh6U
Check out this example, in which s/he claims that dating ‘preferences’ can be discriminatory.

Now Riley’s discourse is a bit hard to follow, but I think the gist’s this; you’re discriminating if you won’t date a transgender person purely on the grounds that they’re trans, rather than on the basis of the qualities that they demonstrate as an individual. Got that? Well I’ll grant that there’s a certain logic to the argument, but in return, I must be granted the right to disagree.

Here’s the thing Riley. Stop obsessively over-analysing everything when it’s very simple. I don’t give a fuck how you and those like you live your lives, or what you identify as. In return, stop spouting more ‘identity politics’ b/s. Give it a rest, and stop trying to project your hang-ups onto everyone else.

Society hasn’t somehow conditioned me over the years to develop an unconscious bias towards you. It’s not discriminatory behaviour because I won’t buy into your agenda and acknowledge this supposed ‘bias’. Think about this the other way around. I can like a transgender person on the basis of their qualities as an  individual, without being physically attracted to that person. I like a woman to have a fanny in her pants as opposed to a dick. That doesn’t make me ‘transphobic’; it means that I don’t fancy you. It really is about preference; it’s my choice, just as it’s yours to wear a dress. If I may paraphrase the old ‘Stonewall’ ad; ‘most people are straight. Get over it’.

Nominated by Ron Knee

Bubbles. Oh, there is a Cuntbubble on here. But we all live in bubbles don’t we cunters. When you think about it. Groupthink. That idea?

The most suffocating bubble is of course the cult bubble. Scientology say where people are coerced or brainwashed into thinking what the group believes. The bubble. The metaphor actually fits perfectly because you can see the person in the bubble (it’s transparent) but you cannot communicate with them.

Are YOU in a bubble? Is it wrapped around your brain? Are you allowed to speak? Not even a squeak? Are you all singing from the same hymn sheet? Yes bubbles from the Holy Book. Remember the non-conformist conscience? They all rejected ‘strong drink’. ‘Bubbly’ come to think. So they ‘conformed’ in that sense. More a party line than a bubble.

The modern atheist bubble A horrible bubble this. Emits a hiss. They don’t know how they came to exist. Witness ‘Hitch’. Trolls on the internet. ‘Bubbles’ by Millais. A work of art turned into an advert.

CAPITALISM. The capitalist bubble mutates into little economic bubbles. Popping up all the time. So destructive. In fact you could argue that the biggest bubble in the world is the capitalist one. Suffocating the world.

‘Bubbles’ Michael Jackson’s chimp. Like a nightmarish imp. Presented to Japanese dignitaries….as though.. from the Evolutionary bubble. The Modern Art bubble. Fucking Horribubble. Full of pride, insolence, impudence. Terrible to live in a bubble reader-to know EXACTLY 100% what’s coming next, to always know, to always get, the talk you expect. Like the Thought Police in your head. The Psychobabble bubble. Babbling big words. Self  actualization. What does it actually mean? Infantile babbling has truly more meaning. They are attempting to communicate at least.

Bubble wrap. Protects the contents of the box. But you’ve got to think outside the box. To get outside of your bubble. So a paradox. Bubblegum. You must keep shtum. Keep your mouth shut (in the bubble). Keep your gob shut. Like a gobstopper in your mouth. Stopping your mouth. From fear. Like in North Korea. Like ‘Kim’. The bubble is him. Like Buzz Light year. A bubble round his head. A bubblehead. Atop his bulbous neck. Above his people. And yes the Trump bubble. And the Nuclear bomb. And if both bubbles collide one huge blast and the world will be gone. There’ll be a bubble bath. If you’ll excuse the pun.

You know cunters the Nuclear Family has been blown to bits. By the Materialist bubble. Like a wrecking ball or wrecking bubble. And the main reason why millennials climb into bubbles. To feel less troubled.

Religious bubbles. The Islamic bubble so dynamic-‘it can go anywhere because it came from nowhere’. But careers around bumping into other bubbles. The Buddhist bubble. A huge big one this. And very old. Squatting over great swathes of Asia. Eternally hanging around. I am in the Catholic bubble I readily admit. We all live in a bubble of belief.

Nominated by Miles Plastic

Random roadworks and all who sail in them are cunts.

At least once a year some cunts decide to have some roadworks on my B-road commute. This year’s effort exemplifies the methodology.
1. Place cones, warning signs, lights on randomly chosen constricted bit, preferably adjacent to junction (closed)
2. Carefully tune lights to allow three cars in either direction past (5 seconds) and adequate time for a pedestrian to traverse the 20-yard coned bit (1 minute, minimum) with both lights on red for most of it.
3. Alternatively tune lights so that east or westbound traffic gets a red all the time and has to use its imagination.
4. Do absolutely fuck-all to the road for a week. Unless you like playing with the hazard lights on your van/truck as you block the road completely to inspect the cones. It is imperative that the surface of the road remains untouched for this period. You can move the cones around a bit if you like.
5. Enjoy the two-mile tailback of people trying to get to work in the morning. This is optional. If you want a lie-in, feel free.
6. On Day 7, dig a very small hole and fill it in again. You can dismantle the roadworks after this, but on the other hand you may decide not to.

Is there any reason under Dog’s heaven why the traffic jam needs to happen on any other day than that of the actual works? And what festering management box is ticked by the CO2 and particulate emissions added to the normal quota by the inching-forward line of poor cunts trying to get to their own jobs and do them rather better than the braindead cunts in charge of highway repairs?

It’s uncivil engineering, and it’s a cunt.

Nominated by Komodo

Firstly, I’m a fat cunt. I could do with losing weight. I’m not a housebound obese lardy fatberg though. There is some self-restraint. I work outdoors and pay tax. I can fit in a hatchback. I really don’t mind my doctor telling me to lose weight, or anti- obesity campaigns. It’s a social issue that’s only getting worse.

The problem is the ‘professional’ fatties (mostly women, and most of them are feminists) whose whole identity is around being fat twats. They want unconditional acceptance. They want to be told they’re beautiful and believe in ‘health at any size’.

They don’t want to be harassed for their weight, or shamed for wearing tight clothing. The don’t want doctors telling them they need to get rid of bingo wings, jellyrolls, muffin tops and cankles. That they will keel over and die by 45.

Tough. Stop being so fucking fat.

You can ignore abuse, confront it or act on it. Don’t expect some empty-headed, top-down awareness campaign on clickbait sites to magically alter the near- universal perception of fat people as lazy, stupid, greedy and clumsy. It’s not going to happen. Stop demanding men date you (same for fat neckbeards and incels who whine that ‘government’ isn’t providing them with a girlfriend – disgusting, creepy entitled, semi-castrated wankers).

Try getting off social media, posting affirmative memes and saccharine Upworthy/Buzzfeed videos about being ‘plus-size divas’, and being told you’re beautiful ‘just the way you are’ by soft-headed, creepy liberal men with bum fluff moustaches. As a slim woman once pointed out to a fatty on some reality TV show (I saw a clip, not the programme).
‘For someone who says they’re really happy with their body you spend a lot of time crying’.

Stop reporting hate crimes because Katie Hopkins made fun of you, or have a twitter meltdown over a cancer research campaign. (Sophie Haagen, bloated feminist ‘comedienne’, of course.)

Suck it up, you tubby useless fucks. Get out there and waddle.

From a fellow fat cunt.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime

I would like to nominate fgm and the cunts that do it for a truly heartfelt Cunting.

I’m keeping it short as this link provides all the info.

All I’ll say is. What the fuck are we doing letting these backward, evil fuckers into this country when they carry out these atrocities ?

Mutilation ? Casting spells ? Fuck off.

Send them back to the shitholes they came from.

Fucking savages.

Nominated by Jack the Cunter