VOTING IS NOW OPEN : CLICK HERE TO REGISTER YOUR VOTE
50% Bonus Savings Accounts With a Catch
16
I came across this little gem quite by accident, and the headline naturally appealed to me….a savings account offering a 50% bonus….with a catch? I thought, what’s the catch? Normally high return accounts only offer this if your have shitloads to save, and even then if you invest it for 10 years and you don’t touch it.
So, I watched our resident shirt lifter Martin Lewis explain to to me in the attached video what it’s all about. Apparently it’s only open to low income workers who are also on Universal Credit, whereby over a period of 2 years saving the government (ie..us, the taxpayer) will reward these savers with a 50% bonus of the highest amount they have saved in that 2 year period. So if you save a grand in the first year, then decide to remove all but a quid of it by the second year, us tax payers will give those on UC a bonus of £500!!
Now, forgive me but if you are drawing benefits from us hard working tax payers because you ‘have no money’ then surely you shouldn’t have enough ‘spare’ to save? And even if you have, wy the fuck are the tax payers paying such a high bonus for saving OUR money to recive it?
Bonkers….and a cunt.
Nominated by : Chuff Chugger
‘twelve good men and true’
will be a cunt, mark my words.
So Suh Lammy Henry (fat bloke in charge of our banana republic’s justice system) plans to do away with jury trials for less serious offences. Of course what is less serious is ill-defined so could be anything at all really.
This wheeze is another step on the road to totalitarian state, and should bring us firmly in line with Zimbabwe. The burning question is, what will the British people do to protect the right to a trial by jury? Sign a petition? Write a letter to their MP? Bend over and take it up the arse? Oh well, never mind!
Fucked. Totally.
Nominated by Twenty Thousand Cunts Under the Sea.
Bovine Lynching Legal Chaos
This is an important issue that we might like to keep an eye on given our ever increasing “enrichment”..
Given that this year the govt have issued 166,000 visas to Indian nationals it’s probably worth noting that they don’t take kindly to eating cows…
“Akhlaq had been sleeping with his 22-year-old son Danish on 28 September 2015, when a mob wielding sticks, swords and cheap pistols barged into their home, accusing the family of having slaughtered a cow and eating it.”
Put Them In The Curry indeed.
Nominated by : Unkle Terry
The COVID Report
Aint hindsight a wonderful thing. Everyfucker fucked up apparently. Well according to Baroness Hallet. A lawyer.
We know Boris couldnt organise a fuck up in a brothel but then, given the circumstances in 2020 who could?
However, should we get another pandemic then the answer is clear – a task force led by Baroness Hallet with a few hundred lawyers would soon sort the fucker out.
I am waiting for a similar no holds barred result of the Grooming enquiry.
In addition. This has so far cost £200 million. All going to the royal family (parasites) of professions, lawyers. In London.
Boris is blamed for 24 000 deaths for putting lockdown off, yet Sweden didnt lock down and did better than us. How does that work?
Expensive, pointless horseshit. Surely these lawyers would be better employed ensuring the scum of humanity are not deported.
Nominated by : Cuntstable Cuntbubble
Dead Pool [379]
Congratulationsto Shaun who has gone and won Dead Pool 378 by picking the renowned Scottish actor and comedian Stanley Baxter who died yesterday in Denville Hall a London care home for entertainers aged 99.Baxter started as a child actor and went on to host some legendary TV Stanley Baxter Show The Stanley Baxter Picture Show The Stanley Baxter Series and starred in Mr Majeika .He was predecesaed by his wife in 1997 and his long term partner in 2016.He published his autobiography in 2020 and moved to Denville Hall in 2023.He was best known for his many Characters in drag most notably Queen Elizabeth II.
On to Dead Pool 379
The rules:
1)Pick 5 famous cunts you think will conk out next.It is first come first.No duplicates allowed.You can always be a cunt and steal someone elses picks from the previous pool.
2)Anyone who nominates the worlds oldest man or a woman is a cunt who we will ignore.
3)It must be a famous cunt we have heard of.
4)No swapping picks mid pool unless they have already nabbed.
5)Hits are awarded based on chronology of death reporting not necessarily chronology of death.