is a cunt.
This 19 year old from Ashford, Kent has a job and produces coaching videos on-line ( of course ) but would like a job that gives back to the community. Very commendable.
She has ambitions to become a frontline officer with Kent Police. Just one small thing though, she was born missing her lower right arm and as a result is licenced to drive automatic vehicles only.
Kent Police require their officers to hold a full licence. As they say, quite reasonably
” All officers responding to urgent calls may need to use a manual petrol car if that’s the only one available.”
I certainly wouldn’t like to think that I’d had to wait for a suitable driver to be found in an emergency situation. Quite apart from the licence issue, how useful do we think Keira would be dealing with a violent street brawl?
Try the Social Services love, or the Sally Army.
Nominated by Jeezum Priest.
It’s going to cost her an arm and a leg if she’s still willing.
13
19? Try 49.
Cunt off.
8
‘allo,allo,what haven’t we got here…😩
14
Having a missing limb shouldn’t stop you achieving.. take mr Han,he had a tropical island with a private army, beat mr Williams to death..
And would of got away with it, if it wasn’t for that pesky Bruce Lee.
You go girl..
15
Ps did her hand fall off from too much strumming..
8
Bullshit Mr Han Man!
9
She could go into porn, pretending she’s got her arm up blokes arse, or another tarts snatch.
20
Reminds me of the observation from Viz a few years back:
“Jeremy Beadle has an unusually small penis. But on the other hand it’s actually quite big.”
25
Or:
“Poor old Jeremy Beadle dying at such a young age, life really dealt him a shit hand.”
15
She should have applied to the BBC.
She’d be presenting Country File by now.
They love a Spacca.
She should probably declare herself a lezza though. Just to be absolutely sure.
20
What is this thing of people wanting to do jobs for which they are either incapable or totally unsuited or both? I can think of a thousand occupations I couldn’t have handled. I didn’t go bleating to the press about it FFS! Suck it up and move on.
20
No arfur, it’s only institutional heightism in the Jockey Club that prevented Richard ‘Altitude Sickness’ Osman becoming a jockey.
6
But on a more serious note, when it comes to this young lady using her truncheon, you gotta hand it to her.
16
Officer Stumpy can hit the bricks.
The Police are disabled enough.
How’s she going to handcuff a suspect?
How’s she going to drag a stabbing victim across gravel while treating him as the criminal?
Ishe can’t even clap for the marvelous NHS.
20
Like I suggested bellow, Mis. I think with all that weightlifting training, she should have a great big “fuck off” metal hand attached, for her to bash all the illegal black cunts faces in and have it filmed in widescreen HD, for everyone to see.
8
Forgot to mention, Mis. Neither could I clap to save my own life, due to my hand being twisted to fuck with rheumatoid arthritis. This lassie is better off than me.
5
yeah but you’re not moaning about being a front line copper Sammy.
wonder if she gets a discount on gloves?
7
She could wear mittens like me for the easiest.
4
She could be fitted with various prosthetics like some cut price Robocop.
10
I think she’s been unfairly treated.
Seeing as the majority of fatso’s are back at the station scouring the internet for hate speech, surely there’s an opening for someone who could operate a computer mouse?
Then, if she comes across some pensioner saying they don’t like park keys, she can go along with the other 15 arresting officers and do all the talking.
‘Shut yer laptop down, son. You’re nicked!
14
She’d be a perfect Kent Police telephone answerer. You only require one hand to answer the urgent calls and fob people off.
Caller: Help, there’s a burglar downstairs who’s brandishing a machete. He’s about 5 foot 7, male, brown skin…
One Hand: Whoa whoa, there’s no need for that racism, madam. We’re a bit busy now, but we can be there by next Monday.
15
Unfortunately Cap’n, I can confirm the truth in what you say. I once phoned in to report a blatant and serious crime. The tart who answered was very polite but it was clear that she regarded her job as getting rid of me. I went in the local nick and the guy on the desk had quite the opposite attitude. He took all the details and shortly afterwards a detective phoned me and we discussed the event at some length. I had a home visit which lasted an hour and at the end I asked if the miscreants would be prosecuted. He replied that the problem they often had in such cases was that people wouldn’t go to court as witnesses. I told him in no uncertain terms that if he supplied the court date I would turn up, suited and booted but I never heard any more.
13
She could have a metal hand attached and go on the front line, bashing illegals in the face who look to be causing trouble.
7
Thirty-odd years ago Sammy, there was a man worked in Cargo at Birmingham airport who was missing a hand. In its place he had a big stainless steel hook which he used skilfully and to great effect shifting some heavy stuff around. I remember thinking I wouldn’t have got in a fight with him but actually he was a nice guy.
8
Interesting arfurbrain. Hope no one ever told him to sling his hook. This policewoman could have all different attachments, depending on what job she’s needed for.
6
She’s fortunate having to only need one pair of scissors.
5
Keira Simple instead
6
She should be at the ready whenever they’re short handed.
7
stumpy has a point.
The police whine about diversity all the time,and have all sorts of pubeheads,
umbongos, curry rats, trannys,
puddle skippers etc.
Not many cripples though.
When’s the last time you saw a blind copper?
no, they have to make do with becoming a football referee or working for Border Force.
Nobody is more colour blind than a real blind cunt.
Although the labrador would need diversity training.
11
I’m afraid she’s going to end up being a till girl. At least its less likely to be finding her hand in it.
6
She could join the SNP and become the new Sturgeon – caught with her hand in the cookie jar.
‘Och, ah didnae even know we HAD a cookie jar.’
8
Sailors in wheelchairs being hauled up the mast on training ships. Wheelchairs pulled up mountains, caving is awkward but wheelchairs fold. Having part of an arm missing would be a large disadvantage for a frontline police office. More likely to be accepted by the RAF to train as a pilot if she claims trans or lezza status she could start next Monday. A question, my Bulldog is dark brown, smells, doesn’t understand English, does fuck all do you think he would qualify for benefits, ticks all the boxes
14
What a pity, Black biscuit, you could’ve used him as a money box, when they had them outside shops when collecting money for spastics.
6
Contacting itv because you don’t have the criteria for a job you want doesn’t achieve the standard of ‘news’, to me .. what it IS, is the equivalent of running home to tell mummy in the hope mummy will get whatever has occurred overturned.
Via an outpouring of public sympathy for whatever shit, presumably.
Always bleeding heart or lefty. I don’t think the cunter who recently described the problems with his new faeces-tinted noisy upstairs neighbours would get the call back from itv(or bbc)
The stupid dirty cunt that rang to tell ’em she pissed herself during a thunderstorm, though? (cunted last year) .. just looking for notice. And a fucktardo.
This lot aren’t even pushing advertising. I don’t know what the fuck is going on …
***
‘Would you sign this petition to force the police service to reconsider keira semples job refusal, Mr.Cuntrmall?’ We need just ONE more signature before some arbritary time thing runs out in 20 seconds, and it’d be guaranteed …
‘No’. 🖕🖕
10
Can’t even type my own fuckin’ name ..
8
Why stop with the arm? Remove a few more limbs and she could be a potential robocop, “Drop the knife darkee, you have 15 seconds to comply” “Dead or alive you’re coming with me” (dead preferably)
10
I want to join the rozzers…
I don’t think so mate.
10
She could bring back the old add from that’s ASDA price, when the girl slapped her arse.
7
Become a coppers nightmare instead and break the law. They won’t be able to handcuff you if caught.
6
She’ll be Semple Red with rage, if she doesn’t get the job.
4
Those pakis at Manchester Airport made the female officers cry.
A one armed version would like as not have been put in a coma.
“I think that paki broke my nose!”
“I don’t think he has mate”
Cunts.
Good morning.
8
ironside – cripple
Colombo- cyclops
kojak-leukemia
Ms Marple- dementia
poirot- Belgian
they didn’t let disabilities hold them back.
they are the long arm of the law.
11
Morning MNC…do you remember…Miss Marple’s cobwebby fanny is what got yours truly and a fan of Italian motorcycles into a little spat on the forum last year?!
5
It’s not often I have a fallout with anyone on here…not like you, you nasty bully. You’ve caused 3 people to top themselves.
6
I do, Thomas.
Me? I’m genealogy personified.
They started it anyway.
fuck em😃
5
geniality 😀
3
Missing lower arm? I’m sure the RAF would bend over backwards to accomodate her in an automatic typhoon with expensive adaptations.
4
Slasha johnson has only got half a head, but she is now the face of john Lewis new soup bowl range..
10
Someone suggested Kiera should go into porn.instead which isn’t a bad idea.
it’s more respectable than being a copper.
she could star in shark attack porn.
or chainsaw mishap porn.
butter up her stump and have it rubbing around my shitty anus while I drop a big wad of baby batter in her open mouth while dressed as Quint from Jaws.
7
🎵 You can go swimmin’
With no-handed wimmin’ 🎶
4