I’d like to nominate “ vabbing”.
Yes folks, the act of smearing your face with clunge juice in order to attract a man.
I can honestly say, that I’m no fan of wimminz wearing perfume, I prefer them just to smell natural and clean, and one could argue that the fragrance of the clopper is natural too.
But here’s the rub 😉. What if you’re about to go out, done your hair and nails etc, and just before you head out, remember you haven’t vabbed, so decide to give yourself a quick smear from the fruits of the beaver on your way out, not realising you’ve just started your monthly.
What next? Fruity gentlemen sticking their fingers up their jacksie and putting on a little foundation.
Is there any need for this? Why not just wear a pair of soiled panties round your neck, or discreetly spike a chaps pint pot with clunge gunge, or even better, just go out and chat blokes up.
Nominated by: Cuntington Smythe
Also noticing the whiff is Dickie Dribbler:
Just when you thought you’d heard it all.
Are you a woman and looking for a little bit of hot, passionate lurrve action? Then try vabbing. Just stick your fingers in your organ of matrimonial necessity (cruder terminology is available on request) then smear the resulting secretions on your pulse points, behind the ears or, if you’re really gagging for it, why not rub it all over.
If the lunatics on TikToc are to be believed the pheromones in your juices will help you pull. What you’ll pull is open to debate. Perhaps penguins, herons, otters, seals, the Spanish trawler fleet, who knows but, unless he suffers from Anosmia (smell blindness), it’s not likely to be a man.
Who thinks of this cr@p.
Speaking as a single man I wonder if kn0b cheese has the same pulling power on women? I’m not volunteering to try it to find out lest one of the ladies with an Adams apple like a basketball gets the wrong idea.
Anyone willing to risk it?