Olivia Colman

Olivia Colman’s a bit of a cunt, isn’t she?

Initially it was quite humorous seeing this funny-looking goon in productions but now the moon-faced ferret is in everything. It’s as if she’s cloned herself for every channel.

Who can forget her demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with the Northern accent in Peep Show? Or the demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with a Northern accent in Flowers? My favourite was the demented, wide-eyed screechy French woman with a Northern accent in Les Miserables. Now she’s up for an Oscar (who still watches this backslapping shitfest) for her role as Queen Anne as a demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with a Northern accent.

However, she’s recently remarked how she feels “threatened” by losing her anonymity and now lives “like a hermit” since achieving fame.


Colman, who starred in Broadchurch with that other portentous cunt David Tennant (who attended the Lifts-his-Right-Eyebrow Drama School) admitted that she rarely ventures out. “I have friends that I adore and I like going to safe places with them, my home or their home,” she said.

Yet another millionaire thesp “suffering” the pressures of fame. Listen chip-pan hair, if you don’t like the occasional little person kissing your arse, telling you they love you, and asking for a selfie then fucking retire! Nobody’s forcing you to appear in twenty shows a year. Christ on a skateboard! Start the clock on the “Trump man bad, Bwexit bad” gibberish. The only difference between you and any other whining, preening one-trick fucking pony is that you actually resemble a pony, you bug-eyed, bunny-toothed bore.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

Will Young (2)

Will Young has declared that ‘The Grand Tour’ is “pathetic and repulsive” for referring to a Jeep being driven by Jeremy Clarkson as a vehicle used by the homosexual community. Which is, of course, correct. It’s by far the gayest vehicle for men ready to leap fabulously from the closet, followed very closely by the Toyota Hilux (for northern men in denial).

He’s now threatened Amazon with being reported to Ofcom, those bunch of toothless twats. No doubt Amazon are quaking in their boots, being squared up to (online, of course) by a certified bumlord.

He ought to keep his nose out of motoring matters anyhow, as last year he was handed a driving ban for crashing into a car in Porridgeland, almost wiping out a pedestrian who had to leap out of the way. Quite how he lost control, we’ll never know…

Will Young – keep your nose out of mens’ business and stop going squealing onto social media when an innocent joke offends your poofy spinelessness.

Nominated by Thomas the Cunt Engine


This legalised extortion of drivers wallets needs a proper Cunting.

2 weeks ago my ‘renewal invite’ came through, with an astonishing increase from £300 to nearly £900. After telling them to ‘get stuffed’ yours truly begins to boil his piss and searches the market only to find that AXA come out as the 78th most expensive of 79 providers at a whopping £1279. Now sitting at the top is SAGA at a wonderful £270 for everything I want, so Grumpy Cunt becomes Happy Cunt and purchases said policy, and finds its underwritten by? Yep..AXA!


Nominated by The Eternally Grumpy Cunt

WEF Davos

The Annual WEF meeting or is that a skiing jolly for the rich and wealthy is in full swing this week.

Already blaming the world financial ills on brexit, China not buying much, because of brexit, and probably too much snow in Davos, because of, yes you guessed it Brexit.

Even LeGuard probably blames her own economic mismanagement of her alleged corruption on, yes, Brexit. (Nothing to see here).

All it needs now is the appearance of we’re all in it together 6 jobs Osbourne stuffing his face with grouse duck spread in marmite caviar, and the sighting of some prominent Tory MP talking to some dodgy Russian oligarch over the latest consignment of Novachek to Salisbury. All gloriously captured by a squad of around 70 journalists, outside broadcasts units, sent to cover this “major event”, and that’s just the AlBBC.

What exactly does the “World Economic Forum” do? Cunts.

Nominated by Speak Your Mind

Dead Pool [121]

Congratulations to Lord Biryani who has won Dead Pool 120 by picking the immimitable Windsor Davis. She was 88. Into the oven he goes and it ain’t half hot!

On to Deadpool 121

Here are the rules (pay special attention to the first one):

1. Nominate who you think is the next cunt on the way out. You can have up to five choices. List your nominations in the comments of this post. It’s the current Dead Pool. Comments not in this post (e.g. in the previous one or other posts) will be ignored!

2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and we start again. Of course, you can always be a really annoying cunt and steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the previous pool (like Black and White Cunt frequently does).

3. It actually has to be some newsworthy cunt that people have actually heard of!

Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies