Where to begin?
You know the type – young, unwashed and completely fucking annoying. Americans are by far the worst and will quite often make me wonder if my views on forced sterilisation need revising. But I have also met some British ones who made me want to fill my ears with molten metal, so perhaps unfair to single them out.
Trouble is the chicks are often quite fit, and a lot less likely to have AIDS than the locals, so I find myself falling into the trap of talking to them. Big fucking mistake! You have to pass the endless hours of them talking at you by imagining how good it would be to shut the stupid bitch up with your sweaty cock. The blokes are just as bad, but there is zero reason to chat with them so they don’t annoy me as much. They have their own uniform – bearded beta males, with skinny jeans and cuntishly round glasses – so easy to mark and avoid.
Usually you find these cunts sitting around beach bars like flies on a fresh turd – on leave from their ‘tough’ assignment somewhere. Really they are just looking for some unsuspecting target to bore to death with their stories, which are really just a way of telling you that they are better than you. Complete fucking predators.
Once they have a victim, they’ll drone on and on about doing ‘valuable community fieldwork’ in Africa or Asia or some other shithole. Why is it never somewhere cold and grim, like Russia? Or Mongolia? Because the cunts are really just there on holiday, justifying themselves by doing sub-standard work for people who could do it better themselves. Like how many skills does it require to hand out sanitary pads? Or build a shitter? Why do we need to fly white Europeans around the world to do these basic tasks that were mastered tens of thousands of years ago?
They are basically the modern generation’s missionaries, washing away the original sin of being born in a decadent, white middle class family. Then heap on top of it a healthy dose of daddy issues. You can just imagine the scene; first they get a nose ring, next a tattoo of some shitty dolphin or something, then they fuck a black guy three years older at high school. But that didn’t get the desired response, so now they escalate – ‘Daddy, I’m off to Uganda to teach women about feminine hygiene’. Like they even know where the country is.
I am struggling to deal with the epic proportions of their cuntishness. Why are they never engineers or scientists? You know – people who could actually help. No, these people are our fucking dross – dead beat idiots who fail to impress at school, now bored that their lowly bank balance can’t make them feel superior in any way to normal, economically active people, then think that their mediocre understanding of the world is somehow going to revolutionise Africa and some how turn people’s lives around.
Now I know what you are thinking? Every little helps right? Bullshit. These are the types of people who exude the worst characteristics of Westernism. They bring with them all the shitty social diseases that are running rife back home – socialism, feminism, egotism – you know, the fucking opposite of that a young African person needs to succeed in the world.
Who knows what they really actually do? I never actually see them in the field. You just find them doing what everyone else is doing – hanging out in bars, smoking weed and looking for a shag, but the difference is that the other people aren’t judging every other fucking cunt there.
The thing that pisses me off the most is how they immediately dismiss other lines of work. Work the oil & gas industry providing employment to thousands of Africans – that’s Western exploitation and you are basically Hitler. Build a fucking toilet out of some wriggly tin and a pallet – you are a fucking hero and need to be worshipped. How does this work in their head?
If you want to ‘transform’ Africa, run a successful business that employs local people. Show leadership, make difficult choices, teach them how to be economically independent. Don’t fucking treat them like wounded animals and breed endless dependency on Western charity just to feed your own bottomless ego. That is half the reason we are in this fucking problem in the first place!
Fucking cunts the lot of them
Nominated by Dick Malone