11 | April | 2015 | …. is a cunt

I’d like the local council to explain their reasons for planning road repairs and extensions / “improvements”.

Firstly they spend at least 2 weeks cordoning off and putting diversions into place, which causes mayem with rush hour traffic. (Steveie Wonder could plan these diversions better, as if they don’t necessitate you detouring at least 20 miles, they route you through the roughest council estates, giving the local “migrant workers” the opportunity to steal your tyres as you drive through.

Road works “planned time” is material for a comedy sketch. I’ve learned that you calculate the actual time of disruption by a formula which involves multiplying the actua planned weeks by a factor of 5 then adding on a day for each “white hat” on the job. Factor in two weeks for “inclement weather”, where they cannot do the job and add on 10% for lost time on Fridays, when they all bugger off early.
(Don’t be fooled by them working at weekends.. this is not work, its a religious festival of the church of the road digger, where they drink coffee in the portakbin, read dirty mags and smoke fags.

THEN, just as they can procrastinate no longer, and the work is complete, you can guarantee that they will leave all the contraflows, diversions and bollards in place for at least another two weeks. Not because they need to, but because its too much trouble to remove them.

Lazy cunts!

Nominated by: Lez

I would like to cunt roadworks the council or whichever other cunt is associated with the whole fucking process.

For weeks if not months I have had to travel for half an hour longer each time I want to get on the motorway. I wouldn’t mind if there was a noticeable difference to the road either, but each time I drive past nothing has fucking changed apart from where the overpaid high visibility “workers” are standing. I almost missed a flight today because some twat decided rush hour the day after schools break up is a good time to start a road widening scheme.

I am no expert on architecture, engineering or swiping public coffers but even I can see that was a fucking stupid thing to do. The iceing on the cake of cuntishness is that my tax payer pound sterling is paying for all this.

I really hate this country at times.

Nominated by: Cuntocracy

Today, I’d thought I’d try a multiple cunting. To start with, the staff at Selwood Academy in Frome, and the local police. Jayden Taljaard, a nine year old pupil at the school has recently been excluded. Apparently, every Friday the school has what they call the “Golden Hour”. This is where the children are encouraged to bring in a toy for the last hour of the school day.

Jayden, who apparently has ADHD and other learning difficulties, chose to take a BRIGHT ORANGE toy pistol. Being 9 years old, and suffering learning difficulties, Jayden was completely unaware of the shit storm he was about to provoke. THREE teachers ( who I can only assume had the collective IQ of a sponge) complained that felt threatened by the BRIGHT ORANGE AND OBVIOUSLY TOY PISTOL. The Head Teacher, who also has the IQ of a sponge, called the police.

As I’ve said on more than once, I spent 18 years in the army, defending this country from possible foreign enemies. It seems I wasted my time, because the true enemies to this once great nation, are the fucking left wing nonces, who infest every level of our public services. They’re soft bastards, who are intent on making the rest of us soft bastards.

Now, in a sane world, the police would have told the head teacher to get a fucking sense of perspective, grow the fuck up, and stop wasting their time. Unfortunately, we don’t live in a sane world. The police rocked up at Jayden’s home to explain the dangers of firearms. On top of that, Jayden’s mum and stepdad received a letter telling them that, as Jayden was currently excluded, he was not allowed to leave his house, because he wasn’t in school. So effectively, a nine year old boy is under house arrest, for the crime of mistakenly taking a BRIGHT ORANGE, OBVIOUSLY TOY GUN to school.

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw