On this auspicious day of days what better way to celebrate than to recall Burns’ great work, the Address to a Haggis :

Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the puddin-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o’ a grace
As lang’s my arm.

Ye Pow’rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o’ fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware,
That jaups in luggies;
But, if ye wish her gratefu’ prayer,
Gie her a Haggis!

Or for those you English cunts, a translation to the King’s English…

I say old chap
You’re a jolly nice pudding
Just look at all these nice ingredients
Bits of stomach lung and Christ knows what
What can I say that’s worthy
Of crap like this

Why in God’s holy name
Would anyone serve up such offal fare
Scots say they want no sloppy watery stuff
And yet they all eat porridge
So if the wife says slip her one
Slap her with a haggis!

Translated from the heathen tongue by the honorable Dioclese

A report published today (15/1/2024) made for a damning report in the many failings towards the GMP against grooming gangs in Rochdale, with young white girls kidnapped, raped and used as nothing more than sex toys by the usual suspects.

The report extends its findings to similar incidents in Manchester and Oldham, with the police failing to investigate crimes against young girls and that sexual abuse of young children has been going on since at least 2004 with little or no police intervention.

The link attached goes into detail of the many failings of the GMP, either through sheer incompetence, lack of intelligence or for more woke intentions.

Typically enough the chief constable in charge of the GMP at the time – Peter Fahy, was knighted in 2012 for his services to policing, FFS!

And yet despite the damning report against senior police officers and managers, will they be brought to task and face the consequences? I doubt it.

In the mean time thousands of abused young girls (and boys for all we know) will suffer genuine PTSD for the rest of their lives, not helped by the knowledge that the GMP failed them time and time again!

aolnews

Nominated by Technocunt.

(We have an extra nom at 5pm for all you Scots cunts – Day Admin)

Damien Byrnes, from Tottenham, was jailed for 5 years for GBH with intent after cutting off Gustafson’s penis with a knife. His two co-defendants Jacob Crimi-Applby and Nathan Arnold were also given custodial sentences for removing Gustafson’s nipple and freezing his leg, so he had to have it amputated.

LBC News

LBC News 2

Hang on JP, you might say, why is Gustavson the cunt and not Byrnes.

Because Gustavson PAID Byrnes to cut his knob , etc off and film it, which he then uploaded to his pay-per-view ” Eunuch Maker ” website.

Gustavson also required extensive hospital treatment, at the taxpayers expense, and claimed a considerable sum in Disability Benefits for something that was done at his instigation.

He is also due to stand trial, along with several other men, for a series of alleged castrations and other extreme mutilations, all of which were filmed for his website.

He is not a victim, but an instigator, and I hope he gets at least as long in jail as Byrnes.

The Guardian

Nominated by: Jeezum Priest

The management and other people at my office are constantly bringing food in….today we had 17 pizzas delivered as a treat for the staff!.

There was also a pile of boxes of shortbread and chocolate bars. It is starting to look so obscene that I am wondering what is really behind it, some sinister plan to keep us mentally dependant perhaps, or the idea that if people are constantly stuffing their faces then they aren’t moaning.

The culprits all bugger off early leaving behind half empty boxes for others to clear up or put in the fridge.

It is getting on my tripe so fucking much being surrounded by all this stuff, but try asking anyone to rein it in a bit and you may as well say you eat babies for dinner. Besides this there are all the fucking charity days where a veritable avalanche of cakes descend on the place.

Presumably the employer doesn’t mind if everyone takes eight weeks off a year because of type 2 diabetes complications. It looks particularly bad just after Christmas when most people have already overdone it a bit.

Is there no other way of rewarding staff than pushing more chocolate and lard on to them? Only yesterday they had fucking Blue Monday where the message was have a cup of tea and some cake to cheer yourself up – yes, what have you got to lose except more fucking weight.

What a bag of lardy cholesterol ridden fat arsed cunt.

BBC News

The Guardian

Nominated by: Mary Hinge

Let’s have a, you can’t make this shit up cunting for the Thinking Impaired Wackos of the Global Warming movement.

It is the primary season in the US and the “first in the nation Iowa Caucuses are today. For those of you not familiar with the American system Caucuses and Primaries are held in various States so parties can determine their nominee for President in the November General Election.

Accordingly, Donald Trump was in Iowa today giving a speech when he was interrupted and heckled by a Group of Global Warming Activists. That should come as no surprise as these Global Warming loons are like herpes…they never go away and like the tell tail sore, they always appear at the most awkward time.

But perhaps rather than a better sense of timing, they might benefit from a better sense of reality.

The US is in the grip of another dreaded Polar Vortex. At the time of this writing (according to the National Weather Service) the temperature in Indianola, Iowa where Trump was speaking is -15 Fahrenheit with 12 mph winds. KCCI Des Moines Television reports 7 1/2 inches of snow fell in the last storm and is still on the ground. They are forecasting record cold for tomorrow’s caucuses with a high of only -1 F.

And yet our intrepid climate change fanatics are there braving sub-zero wind chills to remind us all of the dangers of Global Warming.

This headline appeared on the Newsmax website:

“Trump Speech in Iowa Interrupted by Global Warming Activists”

Followed by this story:
news max
One has to wonder if while they were bundling up with winter coats, hats, gloves, scarfs and snow boots to go out to protest, if the thought occurred to any of them that perhaps the optics of a Global Warming Protest in sub zero temperatures really weren’t in their favour.

I hope all of the dumb cunts got frostbite.

Nominated by General Cuntster.