Twitter

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I had a look at twitter once. Just to see what the fuss was about.

It must take a Stephen Fry size intellect to understand it, because as far as I could see, it was bollocks. Actually, you’d have to be a Stephen Fry sized twat to want to post on it.

Who the fuck is actually interested in anything that gets posted? It’s drivel.

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw

I am amazed at the number of people who follow blogs on Twitter. Why the fuck don’t they just read the blog or subscribe to it? I don’t get it. What the fuck is the point of just introducing another layer of shite?

If you’re reading this on Twitter, you’re a cunt…

Nominated by: Dioclese

Dead Pool [15]

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* * * * WE HAVE A WINNER! * * * *
Yes, Dioclese has won it again! What a clever little cunt I am!!

Congratulations to me who predicted the next dead cunt would be former Aussie PM Gough Whitlam who died on the 21st October. Being an extremely modest sort of bloke, I wasn’t monitoring it and didn’t realise how brilliant I was until somebody told me he’d snuffed it.

So we have a new Dead Pool champ and clearly I’m going to have to defend my title one more time! so the slate has been wiped clean and everyone gets to pick a new ‘dead cunt walking’ as we move on to The Dead Pool 15. Here’s the rules :

1. Nominate who you think is next on the way out.
You can have a maximum of five cunts each. Leave names in the Comments.

2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and we start again. Of course, you can always be a cunt and steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the last Dead Pool.

Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored. Any anonymous cunt who can’t be bothered to make up a name for themselves will also be ignored. Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies.

EastEnders

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I would like to nominate EastEnders for a proper cunting…

Yet another rape story. Sure, it’s a terrible, dehumanizing thing. But to make out it’s for raising awareness? What a load of crap. These cunts do this sort of shit just to shock and get ratings… There have been more rapes and murders in the Queen Vic than the Bates Motel and Rillington Place combined. One murder can close a pub. Yet that shithole is still open after several deaths, killings, dead bodies, sexual assaults and fires.

Not to mention the countless incest stories (Filddled wiv by Uncle ‘Arry/Archie/Ernie etc), the ‘Is me sister me mum?’ shite (they’re doing that one again), swapping dead babies, all the slags and wannabe Krays that seem to be in endless supply, the obligatory murder and the pathetic ‘Whodunnit?’ circus that always follows, and that fat bald cunt (Phil Mitchell) who gets away with every fucking crime and misdemeanaour known to man.

EastEnders is fucking shite!

Nominated by: Norman

Prince what-the-fucksit

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Is pre-natal cunting permitted? If so, may I be the first to cunt the new Royal baby due in April.

Also all those media cunts who are going to spout endless drivel in the months leading up to the Duchess dropping.

Nominated by: Fred West

So the heir is getting a spare for the heir’s heir. I am overwhelmed with disinterest. I could not give flying, frankly.

Still I suppose it’s better than President Blair. Certainly cheaper – and at least it’s not a Kaflik.

Nominated by: Dioclese

Ian Charters

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This attention seeking bellend is a total cunt… Auctioning off his kid’s football loyalties? Can’t the little spud choose for himself?

This is actually a sports news story on BBC Manchester… This world is fucking crazy, and this cunt wants a slap…

You couldn’t fucking make this up!

Nominated by: Norman