So the story goes something like this. A woman, known only as CL, sued her ex-boyfriend, known only as HG, for damages/expenses over what she alleges was a broken promise or several.

While they were still a couple, CL had arranged to attend a concert with friends which involved a flight and being away from home for a period of time. To facilitate this, HG agreed to take CL to the airport and stay at her place to look after her dogs while she was away. OK, fair enough. But before this took place they broke up. Permanently. They were already living separately and for whatever reason ended their relationship of 6 and a half years. Oh dear, how sad.

On the day of CL’s flight however, HG failed to show up at her place for the airport run and subsequently did not stay at her place to look after her dogs. Why would he? They were no longer a couple. This caused inconvenience and additional expense for CL for which she then sued HG for compensation. Can you believe this shit?

Knowing any promises or arrangements made before the breakup were likely to be off the table post breakup, CL could have (and should have) made alternative arrangements. But no. She assumed HG was a fucking mug and would give up his free time to help someone with whom he was no longer involved.

Let’s examine the logic here. There are 3 possible ways (living) people can end a relationship.

1. Both parties mutually agree to go their separate way. Rare I know, but it happens. In which case, make your own arrangements CL and get on with your life.
2. CL breaks up with HG. He’s now upset and much less inclined to do her any favours. In which case, make your own arrangements CL and get on with your life.
3. HG breaks up with CL. She’s been given her marching orders. In which case, make your own arrangements CL and get on with your life.

We now live in a world where everything has to be done according to your wishes regardless and if it isn’t, it gets legal. Wow! One assumes that at some point during their relationship CL promised to take it in every hole whenever it took HG’s fancy. Now that’s not happening, presumably he can sue her for the cost of top shelf hookers who will.

Sky news

Nomination by Imitation Yank.

I’m not talking about the third of the world’s population that were born to use chopsticks.
Those sneaky, yellow fuckers deserve their own cunting.

I’m talking about the smug bastards who think that they are impressing people when they use chopsticks.

Go to any Chinese restaurant on any night of the week and there will be at least one cunt, perhaps even a table full of cunts who insist on ‘living the experience’ by eating with these ridiculous things.

Who the fuck do these people think that they are?

They are certainly not impressing the waiters.
The waiters have been using chopsticks since they learned how to feed themselves.
They are just amused by the efforts of westerners.
They probably chat amongst themselves “又一个他妈的贱人” (Another fucking cunt).

They don’t impress any of the other diners in the restaurant.
They just think that they are wankers.

How many hours have these dimwits spent at home practicing, using elastic bands?
How many shirts have they ruined by dropping food on themselves?

These are the people who order a Chinese takeaway and ask for it to be delivered with chopsticks.

After many hours of practice and hundreds of failed attempts they go to the local Chinese restaurant.

Fucking idiots.

You think that you sound sophisticated by insisting on using chopsticks when everyone else uses a knife and fork?

You think that other people will regard you as well travelled?
You’re not.
You might have been to an international hotel in Hong Kong where there was a 15 minute demonstration on how to use chopsticks, but that just makes you a bigger cunt.

Do these same people go to an Indian restaurant and eat with their hands?

If I was Chinese and owned a restaurant and someone asked for chopsticks I would give them a plate of peas as well.

See how you get on with them, you cunt.

Nominated by : The Artful Cunter

The BBC using Michael Mosley’s death as a climate change push? Surely not. They’ve scrabbled enough deaths, five, over 131km² to justify their ridiculous story. That’s a little over 1 heat death per 26km², bigger than the island nation of Nauru.

Anyway stop driving, eating meat, having kids, using aircon or farting too much. Michael Mosley died because of all of you. Yes, you. Not anyone at the BBC. You. It’s your fault.

BBC News.

Nominated by : Migrane

A cunting please for Life Wirral School, Wallasey.
(It’s on Merseyside, laaaa. Draw your own conclusions, laaa – NA.)

Fuck me, I really thought I wouldn’t have to pen another nomination on this sort of topic so soon after the last one. Once again, disabled children have been abused at a school that was paid big money to look after them. This time, said abuse had involved swearing at children, mocking their disabilities/conditions, and putting them in what the BBC describes as ‘dangerous headlocks.’ One senior staff member even confessed to fantasising about drowning a child (!!!). Oh, and the CEO is an abusive narcissist too who (allegedly) bragged about assaulting a child.

Can someone please give me some sort of explanation as to why, post-Winterbourne View, places like this are still allowed to exist, and people like this are still allowed to get these sorts of jobs? Answers on a fucking postcard please.

BBC News.

https://www.lifewirral.com/ (Read their hilarious statement here – NA)

Addendum: on the same day, this has been published. Maybe if the relevant authorities actually did their jobs properly and ensured that money WASN’T going to such heinous institutions, the deficit wouldn’t be as large?

BBC News.

Nominated by : OpinionatedCunt

Daily Fail.

Scion of the celebrity chef and complete waste of DNA, Marco Pierre White Jnr is not only a cunt but a fucking plank to boot.

The drugged-up criminal nugget posted pictures of his tattooed arse on Instagram then broke into a deli to steal money from the till. Squeezing out of the broken window his trousers got snagged, revealing the anal artwork on CCTV, thus making his identification a doddle. So that’s another spell in chokey for Brain of Britain.

But this case got me wondering. What tattoos might others have which would reveal their identity in similar circumstances? I’ll give you some of our soon-to-be Lords & Masters for starters:

MAGIC GRANDPA
On his Iron Curtain road trip with Diane Abbott, Grandpa had Karl Marx and Diane tattooed by the State Tattooist in East Berlin (no Imperialist, Capitalist tattoo running dogs for our Jezza). Sadly the ravages of time have rendered Diane’s image into a thick, black blob. So just like the real thing really.

EMILY THORNBELLIES
Due to its immense size, Lady Nuge has had all 361 chapters of War and Peace imprinted round the back door.

GRETA TURDBERG
Grotta wishes to maintain her virginity, so her bum reads simply ‘How dare you!’

OWEN JONES
‘Marxists only’ on one buttock, ‘Never been bummed by a Tory’ on the other. Owen’s party piece is to fart ‘the Red Flag’ through his rectal prolapse.

DAWN BUTLER
Dawn is art-free around the rear. However she can still be identified by the fact that her arse is indistinguishable from her face.

ANGELA TWO HOMES
Crayons has ‘Front or back’ on one, and ‘You choose’ on the other. Classy.

DAME KEIRA
Finally our glorious PM-in-Waiting. Keira started having tattoos done but changed her mind half way through. So nobody knows what they represent.

Dark key cunt added this regarding body desecration:

People with tats are not cunts per se. I have six but I treat my body like my living room walls. I would like a picture here and there. What I don’t want is a fucking mural. The tats are Arsenal or Leicester Tigers related and also related to my Hindu heritage (an Om and an Asoka’s Wheel, the wheel on the Indian flag). They are individual pictures on my limbs, not some ridiculous bollocks all over a limb.

I love Courtney Lawes as a rugby player but what the fuck is the point of this? He’s of mixed race but he wants to be green.

OK.co.uk.

There was some bint who worked at the reception at my gym who had loads of tats and I thought nothing of it until I had to speak to her at the reception about my membership. I then saw that she had cobwebs tattooed into both ears. That’s nothing other than a mental illness.

Cunt!