Hillary Clinton [5]

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After weeks of speculation about Killary’s health and after she had a coughing fit last week, today she fainted at an event to comemorate 9/11. I’m sure you will all join me in wishing her a full and speedy recovery

Nominated by: Skidmark Eggfart

Ah poor Killary, something serious I hope. The stupid cunt is actually making Trump look good except I can’t take him seriously because trump is synonymous with fart where I come from. I might proudly wear a basket if deplorable T shirt though.

Nominated by: Alan Fistula

She is the epitome of the modern politician.. Out of touch with the voters, condescending, ignorant, self serving, blinkered, biased, untrustworthy, weak, venal, perverse, perverted, anti-British, two-faced,stupid, selfish and to top it off….as ugly as a butt-fucked warthog.

A pox on the whole stinking bunch of them

Nominated by: Dick Fiddler

Shane Allen

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Shane Allen is a cunt…

The BBC head of comedy is behind the current joke of a series that features modern remakes of Are You Being Served?, Porridge, Till Death Us Do Part, Steptoe & Son, and Up Pompeii!
Allen said it was “insulting” to suggest the BBC’s new comedies were not as good as the past… So where are they? What are they? Name one that is as good as Till Death, Porridge or Steptoe… Does he mean crap like Miranda, Gavin and Stacey, Mrs Brown’s Cunts and Citizen Khan? He’s having a laugh, the fucking prick…

On his remakes monstrosity, he said: “This is a chance to say these are titles and writers and pieces of work that are proven, and hallowed, and it’s a chance to introduce them to a new generation…”. What he means is that the BBC haven’t got the guts to show the originals (for fear of offending some left wing tosspot!) and they want to remake someone else’s work into a load of PC, touchy-feely, sanitised bollocks…

The Steptoe remake looks especially shite… Albert is now bigger than Harold and Harold is now a skinny, pasty gimp with none of the presence or comic timing of Harry .H. Corbett… And I’m dreading the Porridge one… Fletch’s grandson in for cybercrime? With John Bishop? Fuck off!

I think I’ll stick to the originals on DVD… And Allen and ‘Auntie Beeb’ can stick their ‘New Comedy World Order’ up their arses…

Nominated by: Norman

Experian

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I would like to cunt ‘ Experian’

WTF is that all about? They protect your ‘credit score’ don’tcha know? eh? How the fuck do they do that then?

If you’ve got no fuckin money you’ve got no fuckin money, what they gonna do about it? Pay money into your account? Actually no, precisely the opposite! This idiotic ‘service’ cost £12.99 a month – you gotta be a right cunt to fall for this shite!

Nominated by: Ozmandias

The Hajj

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Muslim pilgrims perform the final walk (

I’d like to cunt the hajj.

A bunch of delusional peaceful ones will go to this wankfest and end up throwing pebbles at a wall representing the made up Satan. 21st century and people go for this primitive bullshit. Just a few days ago a space probe started to orbit a planet millions of miles away.

No fucking wonder there’s only been ONE Muslim Nobel science prize winner.

Nominated by: Chris Horner

Tombstoning

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The fucking idiot craze of jumping into water from a height without knowing how deep the water is or what’s concealed underneath it. Apparently jumping off a bridge or cliff into water risking instant death as your body is mashed on hidden rocks proves how brave you are.

Until you lay mashed crippled or dead in the water then the whole world knows what a moron you are. May as well stick a rocket up your arse and light it whilst your mate films so it can be uploaded to youtube.

If your going to hurt yourself in a moronic way at least have the decency to record it so as we can laugh at you and kids being dumb enough to to think about copying you can at least see the possible results first

Nominated by: Sixdog Vomit

If you’re going to jump off a bridge into three of water, at least have some consideration and kill yourself because I don’t want my taxes contributing to your upkeep for the rest of your sad stupid life

Nominated by: Dioclese