Yeah me neither..
Well she is a little nuts…

This ex BBC weather presenter ” there’s a surprise” was asked to leave a flight with her family. After boarding the flight she announces to the crew that her daughter has a nut allergy and can they put a announcement out..

Crew explain that’s not possible, she then decides to approach other passengers to explain the situation..

Captain is informed and they are asked to leave..

Now this is were the stories differ..
She says the Captain was screaming from the cockpit.

But it seems husband started banging on the cockpit door..

At the end of the day the airline is responsible for anything that happens to the passengers, so we’re in their rights to ask them to leave..

Obviously being a big celeb patsy palmer doesn’t feel it’s necessary to inform the airline about the situation..

When you get to Turkey, might I suggest you try a big slice of Baklava, you rude entitled cunt…

Daily Fail

Nominated by Barry zuckercunt.

“America’s first Muslim-dominated City.”

Pro-Hamas parades, animal sacrifice, women and girls expected to wear burqas, Arabic signage, music effectively prohibited, calls to prayer blasting over loudspeakers from every quarter… LGBT flags banned (causing the local libtards to explode with outrage, so not all bad. Though Republicans have apparently supported the Muslim council in their supposedly “anti-woke” crusade, doh…

Once a mighty American industrial centre, now virtually unrecognisable.

Naturally the local Demoncunts set the ball rolling, passing laws in the early noughties allowing for the “public call to prayer” to accommodate local Islamists.

Oh the irony! Pure schadenfreude!

Coming soon to a town near you.

GB news

Nominated by Shit-cake Baker.

Not just a mega-cunt, but a pathetic joke into the bargain.

The 93 year old “grandpa out of Texas Chainsaw Massacre lookalike” has married a 67 year old Russian gold digger.

What’s his game?

Egomania?

No chance of getting it up without a skip full of viagra.

Be dead next week, if not already.

Guess he goes by the Oscar Wilde maxim:

“There’s only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.”

Or in Rupert’s case: “there’s no fool like an old fool.”

What a silly bunt.

bbcnews

Nominated by Mingejuice Bottler.

This 24 year old was recently convicted of sexual assault and rape of two young females.

Admittedly, the young ladies were somewhat ‘refreshed’ after a boozy session, and were both asleep.
Not that this, in any way, excuses Mr. Fox. As both young ladies were obviously incapable of consenting, he should have kept it zipped.

That’s not what this nom is about.
Mr. Fox defense was he suffers from sexsomnia!

Eh? Thats got to be made up, JP, I thought.

Well, no. A few minutes consult with Aunty Google will inform you that it’s a real condition, like sleep walking, but with sex involved. I’d attach a link, but Google it because WordPress doesn’t like it if you try more than one link.

Liverpool Echo Link. Laaa.

Didn’t do him any good, he got 10 years.

Nominated by : Jeezum Priest

Recent unfortunate experiences with certain ailments has led me seek out further information and clarification about them. In this day and age, the obvious source of reference is the internet.

But my experience has taught me that referring your queries to Doc Internet are not good for you, being at once frustrating, unenlightening, and anxiety inducing.

Say for example that you’ve got an itchy spot on your arm. According to the Doc, it could be a pimple or a mole, BUT it might be skin cancer, so see your GP. Got a persistent cough? Could be an infection or hay fever, BUT it might be lung cancer, so see your GP. Having a wee bit of wee trouble? Could be an infection or prostatitis, BUT it might be prostate cancer, so see your GP.

In short cunters, my suggestion is that if you’ve got any health worries, save yourself time and angst by cutting out the middle man and going straight to your GP. It’s odds on that you’ll just end up doing that anyway.

As far as I’m concerned, Doctor Internet serves no positive purpose beyond acting as a spiritual home for hopeless hypochondriacs, which I for one am fast becoming.

Nominated by Ron Knee.