I understand that some people are utterly immersed in their own retarded universes, but I strongly object to those peculiarities affecting my reality.
Allow me to present to you Thick Eyebrows for a cruel and excessive cunting.

There are clueless girls running round everywhere, it would seem, sporting this abomination, and thinking that it is actually making them look beautiful.
Unfortunately for them, the reality is that cunters like me end up staring at them in total astonishment and disbelief. This is making trips to the supermarket or the pub very difficult, as the law of averages usually presents one of the twats in the form of a cashier who thinks you looking at them means you would like a polite conversation.
WRONG. Totally fucking wrong!
Perhaps they are inspired by their manbag toting beardy homo boyfriends and also wish to look like a circus clown.
What a bunch of deluded fuckwitted cunts.

Nominated by Cuntflap

The Gang of Seven

So seven one time (if ever) Labour MPs have jacked in their memberships orf the PLP for reasons rather murky. Big press launch, lots orf spindoctors in attendance but little orf substance said, just a general venting orf spleen and bile. Old slap head ex-wunderkind Chaka Umunna floats to the top like the regulation turd he is. These are they:
Chuka Umunna, MP for Streatham and former shadow business secretary.
Luciana Berger, MP for Liverpool Wavertree and former shadow minister for mental health.
Gavin Shuker, MP for Luton South and former shadow international development minister.
Angela Smith, MP for Penistone and Stocksbridge and former shadow deputy leader of the House of Commons.
Chris Leslie, MP Nottingham East and former shadow chancellor.
Mike Gapes, MP for Ilford South and former chair of the foreign affairs select committee.
Ann Coffey, MP for Stockport and former parliamentary private secretary to Alistair Darling when he was chancellor of the exchequer.

Are they going to resign their seats? How dare you suggest that. No People’s Vote for them. They will honourably form an independent group within Parliament and vote accordingly ie against Brexit and against Semitism and anything proposed or endorsed by Corbyn. They promise and threaten a new alignment in politics. They have funding and other backers and naturally Blair is in there too.

Reminiscent orf the Gang orf Four split with Woy Jenkins + ect ect ect and who remembers that earth shaking episode? Well just the speech impediment (left your mark on history Woy boi). Remember the SDP? Precisely. Only Uncle Wanker Vince Cable who remains as the sole floater in the toilet bowl.

Why go nuclear at this precise moment? They despise Corbyn and Momentum more than they do the Tories. Destabilise Brexit naturally in the final weeks before Fuckxit. In mythology seven is the heroic number but does not apply to these bunch orf cunts.

Nominated by Sir Limply Stoke

Plastic Straw Guilt-trippers are cunts, aren’t they.

When did plastic straws become the supervillain? Why has this issue become the obsession of the meeja?

It’s there in every lazy journalist’s news list; it’s there in our miserably incompetent PM’s laser sights; it’s there in the ten-minute epilogue at the end of David Attenborough’s Nature programmes – a one-hour episode consisting of 50 wonderful minutes of Penguins arseing about, five minutes of ‘how it was filmed’ and then five minutes of what awful people we are for being Westerners.

Naturally it’s all OUR fault. The egregious West. Yes, yes, the film of the turtle was horrible and the floating pile of plastic is awful. However, isn’t this shifting the blame from huge corporations onto the ordinary pleb who is trying, attempting, endeavouring to be as environmental as possible? Instead of blaming the proles for Global Warming, what about banning plastic cup lids, Starfucks?

In a world reeling with people broadsiding democracy, acid being thrown at passers-by, murders by smock-wearing religious retards, the media prates about this. You can stab people while shouting Alläh Akbar but you can’t use a plastic straw!

This is a rapid-easy fix to the real problem of littering and is desperate, piss-poor journalism written by cunty, po-faced whelps.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

A peaceful but legal cunting, your Honours for this nasty piece of trash who is the “lawyer” for the family of the 19 year old whore and Jihadist fancier, Shamima Begum. Apparently the little trollop has now dropped her baby (a boy the poor little cunt) and is clearly working to rehabilitate the strumpet. “It’s a boy” says his recent twat:

Tweets by mohammedakunjee

How could any decent person have sympathy for this girl and her rancid family, even if being paid for legal services.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

A gentle, RIP cunting please, for those “honourable” members of parliament who really do feel they are a special case and the usual rules of employment don’t apply to them.

These thoughts are bought on by the death yesterday of 84 year old Labour MP, Paul Flynn, who, by his own admission, had been bedridden for some months. He has been described as a “principled” man, yet it seems his principles didn’t stop him from claiming his £77,000 a year to do a job he was apparently physically incapable of doing.

Mr Flynn is by no means alone in continuing to get paid for political work long after he was incapable of doing it – so many MPs of all parties seem to keep their seats only to expire “after a long illness”.

Mr. Flynn was going to stand down when “the time was right” and he was a Remainer who wanted a second referendum. Sadly, like so many of them he believed rules were for other people.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs