Evolution. ‘Religion is a fairy tale’ I have heard it said. But religion doesn’t believe animals can change into other animals. In fact fairy-tales are more realistic than Evolution. In Pinocchio a wooden toy becomes a human boy. Well at least it corresponds. In Evolution a zebra can turn into a giraffe. It’s utter bollocks. Bear with me-this blob of fleshy fish gunge crawls out of the primeval soup, somehow crawls into the interior, somehow crawls up a tree and millions of years later become a bald eagle. What do you think fellow cunters? He must have been a funny looking fella this pre-eagle creature with only half his wings evolved. Literally reaching for the skies.
‘The swan evolved from the duck’ we are told on Wikipedia. So a duck is an incomplete swan. Why are there any ducks at all then? There are so many things wrong with the theory. ‘Flightless birds evolved from flying creatures’ it says on Wikipedia. But I thought the fact they flew was THE supreme feature. So the cassowary, penguin, the ostrich, the emu are still an EVOLUTION of the bird. At least their feet are on the ground. Unlike Darwinian Fundamentalists whose speculations know no bounds.
It’s all bollocks. The claw. How did that evolve on the earth floor? Come to think-it is like a claw; evolution has hardened into a law. It has us in a vice like grip. The Darwinian Fundamentalist (his feathers ruffled) if you try to challenge it. Dawkins is a daft cunt like this. I remember once he said ‘apes are altruistic’. Chimp-like sniggers from the audience.
It is a very dangerous idea. I was arguing with someone on here about how many people have been killed by Communism. I would say that Social Darwinism will be the biggest killer of humanity in the long run. That’s for another cunting. Save to say-Evolution is like Marxism cunters. In Marxism all human thought, activity is governed by economics. In Evolution all human thought, activity governed by biology. Both have a dangerous determinism at their core.

Nominated by Miles Plastic

‘Eating more than the recommended amount of sugar’
Seriously, I’m sick of hearing this phrase. You know why we’re eating more than the RDA? Because the RDA is now an absurdly low 30 grams – LESS THAN THE FUCKING WW2 RATION! So fuck off you health Nazi, busybody cunts.

Nominated by OpinionatedCunt

Olivia Colman’s a bit of a cunt, isn’t she?

Initially it was quite humorous seeing this funny-looking goon in productions but now the moon-faced ferret is in everything. It’s as if she’s cloned herself for every channel.

Who can forget her demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with the Northern accent in Peep Show? Or the demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with a Northern accent in Flowers? My favourite was the demented, wide-eyed screechy French woman with a Northern accent in Les Miserables. Now she’s up for an Oscar (who still watches this backslapping shitfest) for her role as Queen Anne as a demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with a Northern accent.

However, she’s recently remarked how she feels “threatened” by losing her anonymity and now lives “like a hermit” since achieving fame.

Psh.

Colman, who starred in Broadchurch with that other portentous cunt David Tennant (who attended the Lifts-his-Right-Eyebrow Drama School) admitted that she rarely ventures out. “I have friends that I adore and I like going to safe places with them, my home or their home,” she said.

Yet another millionaire thesp “suffering” the pressures of fame. Listen chip-pan hair, if you don’t like the occasional little person kissing your arse, telling you they love you, and asking for a selfie then fucking retire! Nobody’s forcing you to appear in twenty shows a year. Christ on a skateboard! Start the clock on the “Trump man bad, Bwexit bad” gibberish. The only difference between you and any other whining, preening one-trick fucking pony is that you actually resemble a pony, you bug-eyed, bunny-toothed bore.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

How the fuck have I not cunted Michelle Donelan yet?

For those of you who are wondering who she is, until I finish university and move out of my parents house she is, unfortunately, my local MP. She used to do a column for the Wiltshire Times with another MP cunt called Claire Perry (she doesn’t represent my part of Wiltshire though) until the paper made the wise decision to drop political columns.

Anyway, the reason I’m cunting her is because she’s basically a Maybot puppet – she has said absolutely nothing against the old hag’s Brexit plan or the Tories in general, she hasn’t said anything against the Tory-caused special school closures (unlike the Tory MP for South West Wiltshire, Andrew Murrison – who was so furious he leaked the news to the press), she has said absolutely nothing against the closure of local GP surgeries and the litany of other bad Council and central government decisions, and, like that old spitting image clip of the two Davids, is in the pocket of the cunts at Westminster and loyal to the end at the detriment of us ordinary folk.

Oh, and she moved down here from Rotherham (the posh part no less) to advance her political career purely because she knew she couldn’t get a seat there! Apologies if this cunting is a little all over the place, but my point is, she’s a first class CUNT.

Nominated by Opinionated Cunt

Has the ‘Anna Soubry is a Nazi’ affair been cunted?

The thing is, who do you cunt?

The fragrant Ms Soubry who used it to talk about democracy? And appear to be a victim? The same Soubry who doesn’t represent the views of her constituents and who wants a second referendum because the first wasn’t to her liking?

The good old BBC who have ignored the braying of the Remain cunts outside Parliament for year or more? They also seized on the opportunity to identify Leave with ‘Far Right’.
The thick cunts who hemmed Soubry in and played into the hands of the Establishment by acting like fucking morons?

Fuck it. Let’s cunt the lot of them.

Nominated by Cuntstable Cuntbubble