Ah, Spring is in the air. Mild, sunny weather, the cheerful chirruping of the birds, the soothing drone of bees. There’s an explosion of colour in the garden, and I’ve spent the afternoon pottering about there. It’s time to collapse onto my sunbed and enjoy a glass of cool wine.

But what’s that? Oh no! Here they come, those cunts on four wheels, awakened from their winter hibernation and cruising around the neighbourhood grinding out those jangling chimes that are guaranteed to remove the wax from your lug holes and set your teeth on edge. Ice cream vans. Or should that be I scream vans?

There’s the cunt that blares out the theme from ‘Dr Zhivago’ every ninety seconds. There’s one who lets rip with ‘you are my fucking sunshine’. There’s another cunt who gives it large with ‘boys and girls come out to play’. Over and over. Every ninety seconds. No sooner has one faded blissfully away into the distance than another twat rolls up. The cocks must operate on a rota.

‘Boys and girls come out to play’? Here’s one boy who’d like to, with a grenade launcher and an AK-47. Ice cream? It would be a fucking case of eat lead, sucker, and peace in our time.

Nominated by Ron Knee

Tolga Binbuga, a Turkish natuonal, was convicted of a string of offences including robbery, burglary, assault and a criminal damage. He was also jailed for a year after pleading guilty to burglary in 2013 after he stole a Mercedes car key along with £3,000 worth of electrical goods from a house in Enfield, north London.

The 29-year-old came to Britain when he was nine and never applied for UK citizenship. Binbuga was also convicted of cautioned for drug possession and shoplifting.

He joined the north London-based Get Money Gang which the Met Police say are the second most dangerous groups in the country.

When the Home Office tried to deport Binbuga his lawyers appealed saying he was a ‘home grown criminal’, according to the Sun.

In 2016 Judge Evan Ruth ruled Binbuga’s gang affiliation proved he had ‘socially and culturally integrated’ into British culture and he was allowed to stay in the UK

Judge Ruth said: ‘It is a sad and unpleasant fact of life that, in various parts of London, gang culture is an accepted and widespread part of life for many young people.

‘In my view, although it is a sad and unpleasant conclusion, the likely association of Binbuga with this north London gang is a good example of his integration into one of the less savoury aspects of UK life.’

That decision was overturned by the Home Office under appeal in 2017 with judges finding Judge Ruth had ‘erred in law’ by stating that gang membership showed a level of socially integration.

Judges ruled there was no compelling reason to prevent Binbuga’s deportation. The ruling stated: ‘Membership of a pro-criminal gang shows a lack of such acceptance [of cultural integration]. It demonstrates disdain for the rule of law.’

Binbuga then appealed again, running up at least £50,000 in legal fees, before being rejected last week, the Sun reports.

It is not known if Binbuga has been deported yet.

Guess its all part and parcel of living in a big city…

Nominated by Dioclese

Alcohol Guidelines, or more importantly the consumption of, deserves a cunting. I was always of the opinion that men could ‘safely’ drink more than women, based on absolutely factually confirmed details such as metabolism, weight etc. Well it would appear no longer.

Seems that from August 2016 the government published new guidelines reducing men’s ‘safe’ units from 21 to 14 to be in line with wimminz.

So there at the brush of a stroke all wiped away the basic fact that men and women are not the fucking same. But rather than admit to that, easier to pretend that they are, especially in today’s ‘equal’ society.

Same applies to everything else in life, alcohol aside. Dunno about you, but if I was caught in a fire who would I rather have trying to rescue me? Surely physicality has to form part of the selection process to be able to do a specific job? Just sweeping it all away under the mantra ‘men and women are equal’ is complete and utter bollocks.

You can’t change basic biological facts you ignorant cunts. Why can’t we just embrace them and move on.

Nominated by Bellendiousmaximus

A prize nomination for Zamzam Ibrahim, the newly voted president of the National Union of Students.
The incoming president has said that she wanted to “oppress white people” and have an “Islamic takeover”.
Zamzam Ibrahim, 24, from Greater Manchester, also described the Government’s counter-extremism strategy as “disastrous” and “racist”.
Using the hastag #IfIWasPresident, she wrote on Twitter in 2012: “I’d oppress white people just to give them a taste of what they put us through!” She signed off the message by writing “LMFAO”, which in urban slang is short for “Laughing My F***ing Arse Off”.
Responding to questions online about what book everyone should read, she said: “The Quraan. We would have an Islamic takeover!”
In another question about friendship between men and women, she wrote: “I’ve had this debate with many friends! Maybe in some cases but Islamically it’s incorrect for girls to be friends with a guy anyway! So I’m gonna say NO not the kind of friendship they can have with the same gender there is always boundaries.”
Ms Ibrahim, elected as NUS president at their annual conference this week, said that her remarks should not be taken “out of context” and they were from a time when she was “struggling” with her view of the world.
She went on: “I was grappling with the deep injustices I could see around me and trying to figure out how I could make the world a better place. I said these things when I was young, impressionable and still developing my personality and opinions.”
Ms Ibrahim will take over running the NUS from Shakira Martin, 28, a self-confessed former drug dealer who did not go to university and once claimed to be more radical than the Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn.

So when is this hate filled piece of garbage going to be arrested and charged with racism and incitement ? Words taken out of context ? Bollox, that leopard will never change her spots. I wonder how many dopey white guilt-ridden arseholes voted for her.
Am I glad I’m not a child or a young person growing up today, and to think that some of these arsehole students might be tomorrow’s politicians or lawmakers.

Nominated by Mystic Maven

I must nominate Dame Jocelyn Bell Burnell and the Institute of Physics. Saw this daft mare on Al Beebezeera recently, bemoaning the lack of diversity, specifically wimminz and bames in the field of physics.

The answer? To launch a scholarship aimed at these poor oppressed groups. Male caucasians need not apply.

Nominated by Mystic Maven