A cunting please for Danny Dyer.

Since discovering that he is descended from Edward III and William the Conqueror, Dyer ( or HRH Prince Danny Duke of Cunts as he is now known) has become an insufferable knob head. It got worse when he discovered that he was also descended from a saint, in this case King Louis IX of France (later canonised as St Louis).

Dyer was a remainder cunt before this, raging over Cameron’s decision to hold a referendum on the EU. But know he knows he can cure scrofula with his royal touch he gone overboard, even announcing that Shamima Begum may return to the UK to receive his royal forgiveness.

What this cunt has forgotten is that nearly every one that can trace their family history back more than 700 years will find a king or two in their family tree.

Fuck off.

Nominated by Marvellous Mechanical Cunting Machine

Boris is the new Trump  As if we needed one. Boris seems to be getting the same media ridicule as Trump. Easy target I suppose. Like Trump, he is a cunt. And full of shit. But he seems to infuriate the lefty, liberal right-on cunts who also hate Trump and were up Rory Stewart’s arse. All of which puts him up in my estimation. And given that the alternative is ‘great negotiating skills’ Hunt, who fucked up the doctor’s negotiations and imposed an unworkable system on the NHS, perhaps Boris is the man. Who knows, he might sort things out?

Nominated by Cuntstable Cuntbubble

Emergency cunting for Boris Johnsons neighbour.  Boris and his girlfriend had a row at their place like couples do. Turns out one of his neighbours called the police on him, recorded what they could through the wall, and took the ‘evidence’ to the guardian. Now call me cynical but what are the odds of this neighbour cunt being a labour-supporting remoaner? I bet this busybody sadcunt has been keeping their ear to the wall for months and years hoping to get some dirt on Boris and help revoke article 50. We’ve all had to put up with nosy no-life cunts with nothing better to do but complain but imagine living next door to some pathetic weaselly bearded libtard spy out to get you. A cunting on moaners, grasses, and interfering neighbours everywhere.

Nominated by MandroidZ

Glastonbury

Deserves a cunting every year for being mainly populated by naive kids living and partying off someone else’s hard work, be that mum&dad or the taxpayer, while espousing socialist views of increasing taxes to pay for free everything for the idle.

In addition this year the festival of cunts is hosting two acts who call for members of the Tory party to be killed. We’ve got laws in this country that should suffice in protecting all groups and individuals from being verbally targeted for acts of violence by lone attackers or mobs, and this is a restriction on free speech that most right thinking people agree with. But not only are these reasonable laws not enough for leftists who have inflicted the nonsense of ‘hate’ speech upon us but now Orwellian restrictions like ‘Islamaphobia’ where even critiscising certain tenets of certain creeds is ‘racist, discriminatory…etc’. But whereas these laws against inciting violence are not seen as providing enough ‘safety’ for some groups for others, like heteronormal white males, it’s not even enforced at all. One band has a song ‘Kill Tory Scum’ another called for all Conservative voters to be executed. Give me two fucking minutes with one of these skinny millennial runts…*Censored for graphic descriptions of extreme violence*…the fucktards.

Nominated by MandroidZ

People that think recaptcha is appropriate are utter unredeemable pitiful cunts.

The football team I support just won a football match. I want to post on their official forums, share my love for the team, acknowledge their tremendous achievement. But no! To register I have to help Google train their AI to recognise a fucking street sign.

It wouldn’t be so bad but I’m assessed against their current AI model and a whole swathe of fuckwit Americans, which means that accurate street sign identification isn’t what they’re after. No, to register to post on a forum I have to accurately guess what some mutated inbred fuckwit American considers to be a street sign.

I could almost handle that. Almost. Except that to contact any company, regarding anything, I have to fill in a fucking recaptcha. Am I human? It doesn’t actually fucking matter, all that matters is that I spend my time and energy training Google’s AI to make the same fucking mistakes that the American public will make.

Fuck this anti-person technolgy, fuck Google and above all, fuck the cunts that think it’s reasonable to fuck over their customers, their supporters and any cunt trying to contact them by imposing such a nonsensical cuntish fucking waste of time, brainpower and energy on them.

Nominated by Quivering Quim